Forestdale Inc. Fathering Initiative Father/Male Accountability

1. Forestdale Inc.Fathering InitiativeFather/Male Accountability “Looking For More Than Just A Few Good Men” Presented by: Howard L. Wheeler

2. Objectives • Provide an overview of the Forestdale Fathering Initiative philosophy and services offered. • Analyze the disease of family violence; symptoms and effects on the family system . • Identify personal barriers of father/males to change abusive behaviors perpetrated. • Identify immediate benefits to fathers/males who choose to change abusive behaviors. • During presentation exchange thoughts, ideas, insights and necessary actions needed to eliminate the disease of family violence.

3. Program Outcome Objective • Improve non-custodial father engagement with children. • Improve father support with children.

4. Forestdale Fathering Initiative Services Offered: Parenting Skills – “Foundation” - 24 sessions Anger Management – 12 Sessions Male Accountability Program – 12 sessions World of Work – Job Readiness – 12 sessions Supervised Visitation

5. Program Philosophy Who Am I

6. Disease of Family Violence What is a disease? In human beings, "disease" is often used more broadly to refer to any condition that causes extreme pain, dysfunction, distress, social problems, and/or death to the person afflicted, or similar problems for those in contact with the person.

7. Symptoms and Effects of Family Violence The Abusive Father/Man • Shows extreme jealousy and wants to keep the woman isolated. • Has an inability to cope with stress and shows a lack of impulse control. (This may not Necessarily appear outside the home) • Has a poor self-image and blames others for problems. • Shows severe mood swings. • May have a history of abuse in his own family and may have been abusive in courtship. • Presents a history of personal and/or family discord; unemployment, cruelty to animals, abuse of alcohol or other substances, and other unexplained behavior.

8. Symptoms and Effects of Family Violence The Abused Spouse/Intimate Partner • Shows guilt, ambivalence, and fear over living conditions. • Feels isolated and untrusting of others, even though she may be involved in the community. • Is emotionally and economically dependent. • Has a poor self-concept (this may not have been true BEFORE the relationship). • Has observed other women in her family being abused or may have been abused as a child. • Feels angry, embarrassed, and ashamed. • Is fearful of being insane. • Has learned to feel helpless and feels powerless. • Has unexplained injuries that may go untreated.

9. Symptoms and Effects of Family Violence The Abused Child/Children • Higher levels of aggression, anger and hostility • “Acting out” • Oppositional behavior and disobedience • Fear and anxiety • Withdrawal • Depression • Changes in sleeping patterns • Changes in eating patterns • Poor peer, sibling and social relationships • Low self-esteem

10. Barriers To Change • Denial • Habitual Blaming Behavior. • Trust Issues. • General Inability to look at “self”.

11. Male Accountability Program Program Focus: • Responsibility and Accountability • Acceptance of Abuse. • Forgiveness – Make amends when appropriate. • Pro-activity vs. Reactivity. • Take Necessary Risks for Change.

12. Male Accountability Program 8 Themes of Curriculum • Non-Violence • Non-threatening behavior • Respect • Support and Trust • Accountability and Honesty • Sexual Respect • Partnership • Negotiation and Fairness

13. Who Refers To The Male Accountability Program • Domestic Violence Court • Family Court • Faith Institutions • NYC Children’s Services • Dept of Juvenile Justice

14. Benefits of Change • Reduced feelings of shame and guilt. • Improved self-confidence and purpose. • Health respect for self and others.

22. Forestdale Inc. Anistiss Agnew Executive Director Forestdale Fathering Initiative Scott Leach Administrative Director 67-35 112th Street Forest Hills, N.Y. 11375 (718) 263-0740 www.forestdaleinc.org