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The True Dons

The True Dons. -the directing clan-. And Who Were the True Dons?. Cara “Angry” Beahm (of light) Gabby “Swimming with the Sea bass” Garncarz Ashley “Speedy Demon-balls” Meeddlebrook Sam “Always on Time” Martin. WHAT KIND OF EXPERIENCE DO YOU HAVE (No, Fulton, we’re not talking about in bed…).

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The True Dons

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  1. The True Dons -the directing clan-

  2. And Who Were the True Dons? • Cara “Angry” Beahm (of light) • Gabby “Swimming with the Sea bass” Garncarz • Ashley “Speedy Demon-balls” Meeddlebrook • Sam “Always on Time” Martin

  3. WHAT KIND OF EXPERIENCE DO YOU HAVE(No, Fulton, we’re not talking about in bed…) • What size part do you want to play?    Big, Medium, or small? Magnum? • On a scale of 1-5, what is your comfort level (being in front of an audience)?  1= uncomfortable, 5=extremely relaxed • Do you have any past performance experiences (plays, concerts, recitals, etc.)? • Do you mind doing suggestive and/or blasphemous (woo hoo!) scenes? We came up with a glorious survey, asking just a few, confounding questions: We got a wide variety of answers…enough said.

  4. AUDITIONS We held auditions in Breidenbaugh, naturally. Using the original, Derek Jetered script, we had people do cold reads. And let me tell you, some of them were really cold…just kidding! It was a surprisingly easy process, as each part fell naturally into place. We were coasting along, smoothly, like a Sunday afternoon drive through Harlem, or perhaps Compton… ….in any case…

  5. Fee ixnay on the scriptay...astardbay…

  6. We then met with the lost-in-translation group in the depths of the Men of Muscle Library, a favorite spot of ours… Heated, furious arguments ensued…reference books were thrown across the room…librarians heaved through glass windows…but, alas, we settled down and set the parameters for the “correct” script.

  7. After the translators gave us the new script, we perused its contents and decided there needed to be some changes (not that it was bad, but uh, yeah)…Thus, we revived it from its medieval slumber and gave it a more favorable, Jimmy Two-times (two times) lingo. “sleeping with the fishes” “We can definitely find a reason to whack this guy.” “Don Pilate” (which eventually evolved into Don Pollack) “Not so, Don…”

  8. ROLES WERE RECAST It wasn’t an incredibly difficult task; we simply had to do some minor refiguring, tweak things a bit. Even though we liked the original script, the new, fully-revised script (fully, man) did offer intriguing possibilities…

  9. A glorious cast list was sent by Hermes the Messenger: Yo yo ma's, the cast listizzo: • Pilate- Pollack • Jesus- Martin • Mary- Young • Caiaphas 1 - Fry • Caiaphas 2 - Mueller • Annas 1 - Beahm • Annas 2 - Joseph • Soldier 1- Fulton • Soldier 2 - Garncarz • Soldier 3 - Middlebrook • Soldier 4 - Rogers • Camera/mourners- Delauney, Krajewski • Soldiers/priests/mourners- Tuosto, Clifford, Curran, Gregory • Music- Coitus(and Lynch and Davis) Please, please, please start going over your lines! (Annas and Caiaphas parts, contact us for your lines because we're splitting the parts.  Thank you.) We will be having one or two readthroughs in class on Monday. Rehearsals start this week, so we really gotta rock and roll.Yay-Your directing clan, UNITE THE CLANS!!!!

  10. REHEARSALS BEGAN It was tough to find times where everyone could be at rehearsals, so we split people up into groups, based on the three main scenes that made up the play. The first rehearsals were essentially read-throughs, working on delivery and minor character development. We worked with the actors to develop blocking. Blocking was somewhat of an ongoing process, as new ideas were constantly being brought to the table by both directors and actors alike. Once people were off-book, characters really began to take shape, as the actors were able to act more, and think less about what line was coming next. But, alas, the lines were difficult for some, especially the soldier group, where short line after short line followed one another so incredibly quick.

  11. For those over 21 (or under 21 for that matter), devious activities involving children’s beverages and senior citizen party favors complemented line bashing. “Oh, you kids today…” “CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG! CHUG THAT YOOHOO!” “CUT THAT MEAT! CUT THAT MEAT!”

  12. THE BAND (“Take a load off, fanny”) We told the band what songs we wanted them to play… needless to say, it was a nice idea. They just did their own thing, but, hey, it worked. Cues were patiently explained to the band… “No, wait until after the bull dance. Fulton’s gotta feel the flow before you go (into the song)”

  13. Quarrels often broke out between band members… “No, Curtiss, I want to hold your drumstick.”

  14. THE COSTUMES/PROPS We gave ideas to the costume people of what we thought was needed. Originally, we thought Fulton should wear a speedo, but uh yeah, enough said… Our costume thesis was pretty much black and white: black is bad, white is good.

  15. We described to the props personas what type of cross would be the least painful for Sam to be annihilated on… “Piping not good for the back, eh? Too much like clubbing baby seals. He was asking for it, eh?”

  16. THE INTRO A meeting was held to write an introduction for the performance. Alas, nothing was decided, except that Sam should write the intro… AND HE DID! We determined that the supermodel women girls (in the words of Coitus) would read it, because they didn’t have any lines…so we gave them some… AND THEN THERE WAS MUCH REJOICING.

  17. PRIMARY ROLES OF EACH DIRECTOR • Meeeeeeeeeeeeedlebrook: Acting/blocking specialist; advice on memorizing lines; random gyrations; the loud one who yelled too much • Beahm me up Scotty: script re-writing; feeder of lines (“eat them; dammit, Charlie”); read Jesus in a convincing Apu accent; present at just about every damn rehearsal • Garncarz (darn cars): breaker of Breidenbaugh fourth floor bookshelf; sender of mass emails/answerer of mass questions by the peons; organizer of rehearsal times • Sam I am (I like bloody eggs and ham): Acting/blocking specialist; instructor of “exploring the space”; provided over-the-top illustrations of how people should act; author of introduction; survivor of duct tape and Fulton’s crotch-watch

  18. CLOSING THOUGHTS • PROJECT!!!!!!! • DAMN THE CINDERBLOCKS!!!!! WE DON’T NEED NO STINKING CINDERBLOCKS!!!!! MAMA MIA!!!!! • SOMEONE ELSE CARRY THE CROSS!!!!! • Good job, everybody, it was one hell of a time. “These are the days to remember.”

  19. This is the end; this is the end, my friend.

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