Managing Former Co-workers & Older Staff

1. Managing Former Co-workers & Older Staff Developing New Relationships with Peers November 5, 2009 MLA – LMD Presentation

2. Two Challenging Issues for New Managers • Managing older, more experienced employees • Managing former colleagues and friends.

3. Areas to be Covered • Positive aspects • Challenges • Pitfalls to avoid • How to find support systems

4. Examples of my real life experiences • Suggested ideas for making the best of a challenging situation • Resources for Assistance

6. Advantages of Older Subordinates • Institutional knowledge • Maturity • Comprehensive skills and knowledge • Experienced • Reliable

7. Learning from someone who has a history with the organization • Developing a relationship with someone who is reliable and mature

8. Challenges of Older Subordinates • May resent reporting to someone younger • May feel that you are not as experienced and don’t have the same knowledge or skills • May feel cast aside because they believe that they should be in the position • May secretly want you to fail because they feel jealous of your success

9. May be reluctant to make changes • May be slow to embrace technology • May be resistant to new ways of looking at work • Generational differences

10. May try to sabotage your successes • May actively contradict any new ideas that you implement

11. Barriers to working with older staff • Poor communication • Feelings of intimidation • Allowing your personal feelings to interfere • Insecurity about your skills • Not dealing directly with potential conflict

12. Two Older Librarians at an Orioles Ball Game

14. How to Make the Most of These Relationships • Recognize and accept that it will probably be challenging at first • Accept the discomfort and move on • Develop clear cut expectations with all staff • Take time to reassess your situation frequently • Don’t be afraid to change your mind and admit that you may have made a mistake

15. Develop your listening skills • Show respect for that person’s skill and knowledge • Learn the strengths of each employee and make certain to give them an opportunity to use them for the benefit of the organization. • Take opportunities to ask their thoughts on specific issues

17. Friendships at Work • Provide companionship on the job • Make work more enjoyable • Gives us someone to bounce ideas off of • When individuals are peers they are generally uncomplicated

18. Managing Former Friends • Can be extremely complicated • Can destroy a friendship • Can create tension and unhappiness on the part of both individuals • Can cause one to question the desire to be promoted

19. One or both friends apply for a position – competition is inserted into the relationship • If one person is promoted, the other friend may feel resentful and angry • All of the behaviors that are so common in children in the playground or with siblings appear

20. Feelings that are Created • Jealousy • Anger • Resentment • Competition

21. Barriers to Having Former Friends as Subordinates • Perception of favoritism by others • Expectation of special treatment • Friendship complicates hard decisions • Conversation limitations that are work related • Inability to socialize at work

22. How to Make the Most of These Relationships • Talk to your friend(s) and be direct about your new responsibilities and your expectations • Set defined boundaries for this new relationship • Make certain that your friend(s) understands your position and that you intend to do your best in your new job. • Meet with all staff to discuss your expectations, either individually or as a group • Limit your socializing with your friend until after work hours • Limit your discussions to personal issues outside of work

23. Communicate with staff on an ongoing basis about issues of concern • Be aware of the perception of favoritism and try to avoid it • Seek out other managers for support to discuss issues of concern • Hone your listening skills

25. Resources • Maryland Library Association, Library Management Division • American Library Association, Library Administration and Management Division • American Management Association • (free website and white papers)

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