H umanist Ceremonies

1. Humanist Ceremonies Your name, e.g. naming, wedding & funeral celebrant British Humanist Association

2. The Humanist Ceremonies network “Humanist Ceremonies™ is the network of non-religious celebrants trained, accredited, insured, and quality-assured by the British Humanist Association. We are the UK’s longest standing provider of non-religious ceremonies and provide individually prepared ceremonies to mark important occasions in life such as the arrival of a child, weddings and funerals. 97% of feedback received awards us 5/5.”

3. A brief introduction to Humanism • Builds on atheism(meaning no religious faith) • A statement of what isimportant • “For the one life we have” • About using evidence, experience and reason to understand the world • That we can have a good, meaningful life without belief in god(s) • Promoting human rights and freedoms • Living cooperatively with people of other beliefs • https://humanism.org.uk

4. The importance of ceremony • We all mark many milestones throughout our lives (e.g. birthdays) in a non-religious way • Ceremony is: • natural • emotionally healthy • about community • Not necessarily connected to religion

5. “Although this wedding will be reasonably relaxed in style, it nonetheless marks the official part of today’s proceedings. For in the end, marriage is a serious commitment and this is why we mark such occasions with a certain ritual and ceremony. For ceremony is important to us individually and collectively. It has been used over many centuries and across all cultures, and fulfils a very human need in enabling us to step back to reflect on the significance of major changes in our lives. It’s also a time when we are able to say the important things that we do not often say in the course of everyday living.”

6. Why humanistceremonies? • British Humanist Association’s (BHA) remit is to express and represent the needs of the non-religious • Ceremony provision developed in response to a need • Members have been conducting funerals for each other since 1890s • Over time demand has increased dramatically and the training of celebrants has developed greatly • BHA at the forefront of developing non-religious ceremony

7. The basics • ‘Celebrants’ are trained and accredited by the British Humanist Association (BHA) • Three main ceremony types for ‘hatches, matches and despatches’ • baby namings / welcomings • weddings • funerals • some others too (e.g. renewal of vows, coming of age) • Most ceremonies are for those who are simply not religious rather than who describe themselves as humanists • Ceremonies are held where and when people choose – no restrictions on time/place

8. What is a humanist ceremony? Our strap-line says it all: Meaningful: sincere and honest. Non-religious: no talk of God(s), scripture, afterlife etc. Just for you: bespoke, personal with no set script.

9. Facts & Figures • Approx. 300 ‘celebrants’ • Conduct around 9000 ceremonies each year • Approximately 85% of these are funerals • Around 750,000 people go to a humanist ceremony each year

10. Our three main ceremony types • Pics of leaflets

12. Humanist weddings • A more personal, flexible way for people to mark marriage • Usually include information about the couple, how they met, why they work • plus discussion of what marriage means to them • Involves somework for the couple – but well worth the effort. Humanist weddings aren’t (yet) legally binding Some advantages of this: • can be held anywhere – not just licensed venues • Complete flexibility with words (civil weddings are very limited) • Can write their own vows • can be much cheaper!

13. Format of a humanist wedding • Entrance to music • Words about marriage from a non-religious perspective • The couple’s story • A reading / poem • Deciding to get married • Couple’s promises • Exchange of rings • Words of well-wishing

14. Personalising humanist weddings Humanist weddings may include: • Writing own promises / vows • Including words of advice from friends/family within the ceremony • Symbolic actions such as handfasting • Music – including sing-alongs • Talking about the couple’s relationship

15. Lizzie & Joel’s wedding, Gloucestershire

16. Example wedding promises Julie you are my best friend and partner in crime, I promise to be there for you in good times and bad. I love the person that you are and I promise to give you space to be yourself and to never try to change you. I promise that I always try to make you feel happy, secure and content regardless of what life throws at us I promise to respect your opinions even if they are different from my own i.e. wrong. I also promise that I will not stop making you bacon sandwiches of a Saturday morning just because we are married. I give you all of my trust, all of my love and all of my tomorrows, all of my life.

17. What people say about humanist weddings “Never been to one before – so much better than mine! Much more personal and perfect wording that suited J & R so well.” “The most beautiful wedding ceremony I've ever been to.” “The joy and laughter that the readings and music brought were wonderful.” “Sincere and dignified, touching, and full of humour.” “Best thing we ever did was having a humanist wedding!” “We’ve had so much lovely feedback from our guests about the style and nature of the ceremony. You did a great job in reflecting our journey so far and aspirations for the future. “

18. Writing a humanist ceremony Whatever type of ceremony it is, we take the same general approach: • Celebrant meets the family • Talks about what is wanted from the occasion • Make suggestions about content, format, contributions (e.g. songs, readings) • Writes a bespoke ceremony • Edits in light of feedback • Delivers it with aplomb

19. The rehearsal • When and where • Who is involved • What we do • What it’s like • How it helps

20. Any questions or comments?