How to Talk to Your Partner Better When Words Don’t Work

1. How to Talk to Your Partner Better When Words Don’t Work Any good relationship is sustained through communication. In marriage, communication is key, as it is essential in expressing the couple’s needs, both verbal and non-verbal, feelings, thoughts, and other needs. When there’s a breakdown in communication, for instance, when partners are not effectively communicating with one another, and when they do, it is often with arrogance, accusations, and shouting at each other, this is likely to lead to physical fights, depression, suicidal ideation, separation, and eventually divorce, among others If in an unfortunate situation, communication breaks down in a marriage. the partners experience reduced intimacy or none at all, are emotionally disconnected, and trust issues develop that lead to insecurity. Couples who are not able to communicate in a timely and effective manner struggle to resolve conflicts, leading to increased stress, frustration, and eventually a breakdown of the relationship, either separation or eventually divorce

2. When the Talk Ends A few years ago, I counselled a couple, let’s call them Tony and Sue. They had just celebrated their 10th wedding anniversary. Their life on the outside would be what most people admire, with two cars and a lovely, spacious home on a mortgage. Tony was doing well in a contracting business while Sue was in a well-paying Job as an accountant. However, looks are deceiving. The two looked admirable from the outside they but deep inside, things were burning and empty. They had reached a point where every conversation almost ended up in a fight, so they agreed to seek professional counselling. Sue was the first to go. “We rarely create time to talk and when we do, it always ends up in a quarrel ,” she said softly, hardly being heard. “He’s always on his laptop, phone or TV when he gets home late most of the days, Most of the times, I am attending to the children or fixing a meal. By the time I am done, He is either too tired to talk or sleepy.” Tony spoke in a deep voice, brief and concise. “I am always on the wrong. Every time I talk to her, she just gets defensive, and every issue is turned against me. Everything I say is wrong. So I’ve learned to keep quiet. It’s easier and safer for me.”