The Single Life Assignment #1

1. The Single Life Assignment #1 • Think of 3 characters from 3 different tv shows, movies, books that are in this stage of the lifecycle (18-29). Try to think of characters from different time periods. • Do a short write up on each of the characters. What is their age? Are they married? Dating? Who do they live with? Do they go to school? Do they work? Etc. • Write a short paragraph comparing this character to what we have read today. Is there consistency between the character and the text? What are the differences? Why are there differences?

2. Part 1: Becoming independent: The Single Life (continued)

3. Review of what we learned last class … • More single people than in the past due to delayed marriage and cohabitation • 2003 stat – average age first marriage: Men 30 Women 28 • There is a trend toward young people either living at home longer to finish schooling or moving back into the parents’ home after living on own for a period of time (boomerang effect).

4. Stats • In 2006, 43.5% of young adults aged 20 to 29 years lived with their parent(s). This is a significant increase from 25 years ago. • In 2006, more than 50% of young men and young women aged 20 to 24 lived with their parent(s). • Boomerang Kids — Almost one quarter of young adults who live in their parental home had left the household at some point in the past.

5. History • Before industrialization young people worked in family business. After this period more people left home and moved to urban areas to look for work. Higher pay – shorter hours. • Men had the option to remain single, women generally made less and could not support themselves alone. • Some racial or cultural groups were limited to certain jobs and wages.

6. History • Expansion of formal schooling. • WWII Canadian men went overseas, women worked in factories and offices. • 1960s student loan program – more people could get post secondary education.

7. Changing attitudes toward being single • Men proposed to women. If he didn’t then it meant he chose not to be married  Having a good time; “sowing their wild oats” • If women were not married it meant no one had asked them yet  Pitied

8. Mona Lisa Smile • Tells the story of Katherine Ann Watson (played by Julia Roberts), a teacher at a conservative women's private liberal arts college in Massachusetts, United States in 1953. • Watson encourages her students to study to become career professionals. She wants her students to lead the world and not just to live as the wife of somebody. She uses modern art to suggest that they need not conform to female stereotype. She feels that women can do more than solely adopt the roles of wives and mothers. • The film focuses on the lives of various students of Watson‘s: • Elizabeth "Betty" Warren (Jones), a rich girl with a conservative, domineering mother who marries a lawyer who is unfaithful to her, and who also clashes repeatedly with Watson; • Constance "Connie" Baker who has insecurities about her body while searching for a boyfriend; • Giselle Levy, one of the few Jewish students at Wellesley at the time, has an affair with a teacher Ms. Watson also is involved with but is one of her first admirers • Joan Brandwyn, who is initially conflicted about whether to pursue law school after graduation or become a housewife to sweet-natured Tommy.

9. Mona Lisa Smile • Clip 1: Beginning - 2:20 • Clip 2: 8:16 – End • Clip 3: Beginning - 1:10

10. Social Change • 1960s – 1970s  democracy, sexual revolution, feminism, anti-consumerism, criticism of nuclear family, alternative relationships, casual sex, contraceptive use, changes to abortion laws • Feminist and gay liberation movements contributed to greater acceptance of single and childless lifestyles. Fight against homophobia and heterosexism.

11. Now • Increase to number of couples sexually active outside of marriage • Common-law relationships • More couples may live together, remain childless, have smaller families, become single parents, separate, divorce, and new respect is given to different family forms. • http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2007/09/12/census-families.html

12. End of review

13. Being Single • Right now most of you are still single although you may have a boyfriend / girlfriend. 16-18 year olds being single is normal. • Many of you will decide to get married or form a common-law union at some time in your life.

14. Costs & Benefits of Being Single • Generally living alone is a positive experience • Some newlyweds may have difficulty if they have not yet gone through the process of developing their own identity and need to go through this while adjusting to living with their partner.

15. Being single gives time to … • Learn about self • Enjoy time for travel • Adjust to changing jobs • Adjust to adult responsibilities

16. Downside … • Loneliness • Dwindling circle of friends • Difficult to have the intimacy and stability needs met  may have more sexual freedom but less ways to express and receive affection.

17. Overall … • This is a time for finding out who you are as a person. Those with a strong sense of identity make better partners in the future.

18. Part 2: Education and Work Choices

19. Education and Work • Society still defines who we are based on what we do in life. • Many of you have more options in this areas than your parents may have had. • Greater affluence (wealth, resources) • Fewer children • More university / college / vocational training programs • Financial aid • Better wages • New careers in technology

20. Education and Work • All those young men and women who went to college in the 60s and 70s led to big expansions of classrooms and campuses. • Affirmative action programs have helped women and minorities to not be discriminated against in the work force. • With all these options, it may cause some confusion as to what to do.

21. Statistics Canada 2006 • 48% of Canadian adults aged between 25 and 64 had completed either a college or university education in 2006; 24% of adults reported attaining high school as their highest level of education, and 15% had less than a high school education. • Young adults had higher levels of education than the older generation. About 29% of adults aged 25 to 34 had a university degree in 2006, compared to 13% of adults aged 55 to 64.

22. Weighing the Alternatives • Exchange theory = cost vs. benefit • Cost = Anything you stand to loose • Benefit = Anything you stand to gain • You will choose the best option for you to minimize cost and maximize benefit.

23. Resources, Values, Education • University / College costs money • As a student, you will not earn much money • A degree will usually generate a better job / higher wage = high benefit; however, jobs are not always easy to come by even after getting a degree; decreased economic benefit but increased social and intellectual benefits

24. Resources, Values, Education • Generally, your values will play a role in what you decide. • Other people’s expectations are also a factor • Many young people believe making a choice rules out other possibilities  not necessarily true. People may change jobs or careers 2 or 3 times in their lives. • However, deciding to become a parent at a young age would limit future opportunities.

25. Employment • Some may want to get a job right out of high school. • Some may not have a clue what they want to do • Some new high school grads may be discouraged at what type of jobs are available. • If you have no special skills you will probably start at minimum wage. • May be a good idea to get additional training (i.e. on the job training, apprenticeship programs, etc). • Remember to check with a guidance counselor before signing up for a commercial training school (some may be more reputable than others).

26. College / University • Many people will go to college or university but the more important question is where. • Some factors may be cost (ie. Community college vs. ivy league private university), competition to get in and stay in, location, size, and personal interests.

27. Travel • Some young people do take time to travel before beginning work or education. • Some will combine this with a job (working for a tour company, cruise line, etc. or through internship); some may find travel opportunities through volunteering with church or through school groups

28. Moving Away from Home • As we have said before, single people living alone basically hadn’t existed before the 1960s. • Now many young people may move away from home and this may be difficult on parents.

29. Dorms • Gives some independence but without all the responsibilities of living on your own. • Have your own room, do own laundry, etc. • Shared bathrooms, common areas • Meal plans • Some rules and regulations • Some react to this change positively while others may become depressed.

30. Apartment Life and Roommates • Renting an apartment as a university student or as a worker means more responsibilities. • Groceries, meals, bills, cleaning, etc. • Freedom to make own rules without interference • More realistic experience of “living on your own” • Generally a joint venture  Very expensive

31. Roommates • Some schools may match you up with a roommate, sometimes you may be thrown together with a random person. • Sometimes you may room with a friend. • Either way, adjusting to living with another person can be challenging however, it gives you life lessons on getting along with others. May be a precursor to dealing with living with a romantic partner.

32. Cohabitation • Unmarried couples living together. Again .. On the rise. • Situations vary widely • The End of Today’s Lecture

33. Next time …. Relationships, Love and Dating