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Affair-Proof Your Marriage. Proverbs 7:1-5. God-Given Goals of Marriage. Procreation, Gen 1:28; 4:1 Purity, Heb 13:4; Gen 2:25; 1 Cor 7:2 Partnership, Gen 2:18, 23-24; 1 Pet 3:7. Matthew 19:6. 2.
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Affair-ProofYour Marriage Proverbs 7:1-5
God-Given Goals of Marriage • Procreation, Gen 1:28; 4:1 • Purity, Heb 13:4; Gen 2:25; 1 Cor 7:2 • Partnership, Gen 2:18, 23-24; 1 Pet 3:7 Matthew 19:6 2
Identify the ProblemRecognize the Sins that Strain and Destroy Marriages • Pride, Prov 15:25; 28:25 • Selfishness, cf. Gal 6:2 • Dishonesty, Eph 4:25; Gal 4:16 • Infidelity, Heb 13:4; Prov 6:32-35 3
Protect Your Marriage! • First, know the danger is real, 1 Cor 6:18; 10:8, 12; 15:33; Jas 1:14 • Next, fully commit yourself to God and to your spouse, Mal 2:14; Prov 2:16-17 (1 Jno 3:18) • Then, combine knowledge and practice, Col 1:9-10 5
Knowledge and Practice“If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them” (Jno 13:17) • If knowledge is power, then knowing each other (and yourself) will give you power to excel in your marriage, 1 Peter 3:7 • God gave Eve to Adam (and Adam to Eve) to help fulfill needs, Gen 2:18, 24 • When our spouse’s needs are not fulfilled there is trouble in paradise! 6
Affair-Proof Your Marriage Her Needs His Needs SEXUAL FULFILLMENT Prov 5:15-20 Vow of faithfulness, Prov 2:17 His greater sex drive puts responsibility on the wife (with-out resentment), 1 Cor 7:3-5 • AFFECTIONSS 2:6, 10-14; Col 3:19 • Expression of care • Security, protection, comfort & approval (Vital) 1) “You are important to me” 2) “I am concerned with the problems you face” 7 www.marriagebuilders.com
Affair-Proof Your Marriage Her Needs His Needs RECREATIONAL COMPANIONSHIPGen 2:18; Eccl 9:9 Do not “go your separate ways” Share life together Protects against investing time and energy in another • CONVERSATIONCol 4:6; Prov 15:23 • Good conversation • Informs, focuses, is balanced and undivided • Conversation killers • Demands are made • Disrespect is shown • One or both get angry • Dwell on mistakes 8 www.marriagebuilders.com
Affair-Proof Your Marriage Her Needs His Needs AN ATTRACTIVE SPOUSE, SS 4:9-11 He is enraptured by your appearance, voice, smell…beautiful to him! She cares how she presents herself to him (and to the world) Only has eyes for you, Prov 6:23-25 • HONESTY AND OPENNESS, 2 Cor 8:21 • Establishes a sense of security, Eph 4:25 • Trust is undermined without it • Builds compatibility of common goals, aspirations, etc. 9 www.marriagebuilders.com
Affair-Proof Your Marriage Her Needs His Needs DOMESTIC SUPPORTProv 31:10-12 (13-26), 23 Manages the house, 1 Tim 5:14 Worthy woman who watches over the ways of her household – worthy of praise! (Prov 31:27-29) • FINANCIAL SUPPORT1 Tim 5:8 • Support that helps her be secure and content • Not greediness and covetousness, Heb 13:5; 1 Ths 4:11 10 www.marriagebuilders.com
Affair-Proof Your Marriage Her Needs His Needs ADMIRATIONSS 5:10-16; Eph 5:33; Prov 21:9 (19:13) Show him you appreciate him and his devotion to you Express your respect with esteem; not contentious complaining • FAMILY COMMITMENTEph 6:4; Prv 3:1-2; 22:6 • Husband who is active in the development of the children (moral, spiritual, educational) • Husband who takes responsibility for how the children turn out 11 www.marriagebuilders.com
His Needs, Her Needs • Men, ask yourself: “How am I doing at affair-proofing my marriage and fulfilling these five primary needs of my wife?" • Women, ask yourself: “How am I doing at affair-proofing my marriage and fulfilling these five primary needs of my husband?" Ephesians 5:33 12