Building awareness of our campers

1. Building awareness of our campers “It is impossible to watch out for trouble and have a normal childhood at the same time.” -Doris Sanford

2. How are our campers different from most of us? They are children; we are adults. Our campers have: • Greater racial, ethnic, and cultural variation • Greater diversity of religious and non-religious backgrounds • More diverse and less favorable family backgrounds • More mobility and disruption of family life • A background of abuse and neglect (Only 1 out of 100 children have a DSS substantiated case of abuse. RFK campers have that in common.)

3. How are our campers different from other children? Children with nurturing, non-abusive families tend to display: • Trust in others • Self-worth • Self-control • Willingness to try new things • Socialization skills [table manners, getting along with peers, sharing, taking turns, respect for authority3] • Normal developmental skill levels [reading, swimming and other play skills]

4. RFK Campers: Developmental delays and asynchrony Some campers will be delayed in virtually all areas of their development [mentally, physically, emotionally, socially] Some campers will exhibit developmental asynchrony [i.e. normal or advanced in some areas but delayed in others] For example: • Body of teenager and sexually experienced with emotional age of a five-year-old • Small for age, but gifted mentally • Normal appearing but behind in school with zero self-confidence

5. The “parentified” child Some campers have been thrust into parental roles prematurely • Caring for younger siblings • Looking after an addicted parent • Having premature exposure to “adult” life [sex, drugs, crime] They may appear “mature” but they are still children They need to let go of responsibility and be “children” at camp

6. Accelerated development Children inherently display the ability to “bounce back” from adversities: Consider this example: • Twins are smaller and have lower birth weights than single babies • This is due to limited resources and overcrowding in the mother’s womb • At birth, unlimited resources are now available • At birth, twins grow faster than normal and catch up

7. Accelerated development at camp? How is “accelerated development” relevant to our campers? • Our campers have been in neglectful environments – not conducive to their physical, social, mental and emotional development • RFK provides a positive environment conducive to growth • When campers trust us and engage with the program, they may gain more from the week than so-called “normal” children

8. “I’m an artist!” • In 1995, Andy almost didn’t come to camp. • His mother was reluctant to send him because he was “uncontrollable” • Andy’s counselor happened to be an art teacher • Andy soon bonded with his counselor and began to try his hand at “art” in some of the activity centers • In chapel on Thursday, when campers were asked what they learned this week, Andy jumped up and proclaimed, “I’m an artist!” • In the last activity session of the week, Andy rapidly made pipe cleaner creations while checking how many minutes remained. • It was Andy’s “time to grow” and he was making the most of his opportunity • In 2007, at the age of 20, Andy is enrolled in college and studying graphic design

9. …also known as…child resiliency Accelerated development or “bouncing back” is known in research literature as “resiliency” [defined] -- The ability of every child to overcome adversity if important protective factors are present in one’s life. (Patterson, 2001) Although resilience may be inherent in children, it can also be enhanced by what we do at camp.

10. Years of research on resiliency have identified many factors that enhance child resilience These can be summarized with three words: Milieu Mentors Message Create the milieu, enlist the mentors and frame the message properly and one can create “turning points” or “moments that matter” for children Resiliency factors Milieu Mentors Message

11. Milieu:The camper’s internal and external environment External milieu • How can one structure the ideal environment for abused and neglected children to “bounce back” and to “grow” • Residential camp • Create positive memories • Two to one ratio • Cooperative interaction that limits harmful competition • Consistent, well-structured program

12. Milieu:The camper’s internal and external environment Internal milieu • What can one seek to structure internally or “inside the camper” • Build trust • Build self-worth and esteem • Foster skill development • Help campers develop proper boundaries • Help campers to plan and to solve problems • Give campers “tools” to help themselves

13. Mentors:Recruit, train, and support good role models for campers Mentors • The staff and counselors are the catalysts who engage campers with the program • Determine what qualities are most important for mentors to possess [empathy, love, listening ear, role models, etc.] • Select volunteers who already possess these qualities • Train volunteers to enrich their abilities to succeed with abused/neglected children • Support volunteers during the week of camp with timely assistance, regular breaks

14. The Value of Empathy? • Mentors are most helpful not so much when they pity children and see their suffering, but when they see and affirm their potential and foresee their healing. (Quinn, 2002)

15. Message:Help campers to frame experiences in ways that heal and move them forward Getting the “message” across We need to help children • Enlarge their world • Frame experiences more constructively • Acquire healthy expectations and a sense of hope • Sense purpose and meaning to life • Use personal faith as tool for understanding and recovery “You have a royal heritage!”

16. On reframing bad experiences… “While you cannot change the past, you can change the way you understand it. You can frame your story around themes of your resilience or themes of your damage. You can find reasons to be proud in some of your worst memories, or you can let yourself be overwhelmed by the harm of it all.” (Wolin and Wolin, 1993)

17. The “premium” blend As local RFKs seek to create a “premium blend” of milieu, mentors, and message they will provide “turning points” or “moments that matter” for children.

18. RFK and the “premium blend” • Framing the message = ROYAL • Envisioning, empathic mentors = FAMILY • Internal milieu= KIDS • External milieu = CAMP

19. 3 FOR 3 Before we move on… Let’s have three questions about this section. AND / OR three Take-a-ways