Zoi Manesi, Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam Panos Kordoutis, Panteion University Greece

1. Probing The Truism: “Romantic Love Has Passion But Will Be Short-Lived, Companionate Love Will Give You Satisfaction And Will Last Long”:Effects of Love Types on Satisfaction, Longevity and Frequency of Sexual Contacts. Zoi Manesi, Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam Panos Kordoutis, Panteion University Greece 3rd International Conference “Children And Youth In Changing Societies”. December 2010

2. The Triangular Theory of Love(R. J. Sternberg, 1986) The three components of love • Intimacy-the emotional investment- feelings of closeness and bondedness, sharing, warmth, reciprocal self-disclosure and emotional support between partners • Passion-the motivational involvement- romance, psycho physiological arousal, sexual desire Additional needs such as those for self-esteem and self-actualization, nurturance, affiliation, dominance and submission are satisfied • Decision/Commitment-the cognitive involvement- the short-term decision to love a certain other and the long-term commitment to maintain a faithful and conscious loving relationship with that partner

3. Sternberg’s Typology of Love Relationships Note. - = low levels of this component; + = high levels of this component Different component combinations give rise to 8 possible kinds of love

4. Relationship quality indicators: relationship satisfaction, longevity & sex frequency • The present empirical study investigates whether two of the most common, among young people, love types: Romantic and CompanionateLove yielded satisfaction, relationship longevity, and affected frequency of sexual contacts

5. Relationship quality indicators: relationship satisfaction, longevity & sex frequency • Relationship Satisfaction • relies on the perceived dominance of gratifying experiences over undesirable ones in the loving relationship. When rewarding interactions (affection, communication, emotional support, equity, etc) exceed unpleasant situations (arguments, conflicts, breaking up), relationship satisfaction is enhanced. • Relationship Longevity • is determined by driving forces that either encourage relationship maintenance (such as high satisfaction level) either deter one’s self from leaving a partner (such as high interdependence, emotional and time investment, common social network, vulnerability due to mutual confessions). • Sex Frequency • is closely tied to sexual desire, which is affected both by the age of the partners and by the age of their relationship.

6. Type of love relationship will affect relationship quality (satisfaction, longevity and sexual frequency) Companionate love relationships will yield: greater satisfactionThe predominant importance of friendship (related to gratifying processes like affection, social support, communication) is easier to detect in companionate love, when intimacy is paired with commitment than in romantic love, when intimacy is paired with passion. Also, the prioritization of the loving relationship and the realism in expectations reduce the chance of undesirable experiences (arguments, etc). considerable relationship longevityIt is based on commitment processes (i.e. investment, interdependence) which are time-consuming and on progressive intimacy processes (like self-revelation). Romantic love relationships will enjoy: more frequent sexual contactsFantasy and irrational idealization (determinants of passion) enhance sexual desire. Hypothesis & predictions

7. Method¹ Participants • N=177, men=82, women=95 heterosexual undergraduate students mainly fromAthens having at least onesexual relationship in past 12 months • Age M=21.79, SD=2.24 Relationships and partners • 52% had an ongoing or “current”relationship • Median relationship duration was 527 days • Median frequency of sexual contacts was 1-2 times a week

8. Method² Measures & Procedure Participants: • provided • their demographics • their relationship’s basic profile (beginning-end, duration, frequency of sex, partner’s gender, age and education) • rated their relationship • on the 45 items for intimacy, passion and commitment of the “Triangular Love Scale” (Sternberg. 1988) –on a scale from 1(=does not describe it at all) to 9(=describes it absolutely)

9. Method³ • assessed their overall relationship satisfaction • using the 7-statement Relationship Assessment Scale (Hendrick, Dicke, & Hendrick, 1998), rated on a 5-point Likert scale with higher scores reflecting a greater degree of relationship satisfaction. Two items are reverse coded.

10. Results¹ Hypothesis testing • Multiple regression analysis (enter method) was performed in order to examine the substantive impact of the three components of love on relationship satisfaction, longevity and sex frequency • Participants’ and partners’ gender, age and education, relationship duration, current or past relationship and sex frequency were included in the analysis as potential predictive factors • A two-way ANOVA was carried out to determine the main and interaction effects of gender and relationship type on the three indicators of relationship quality

11. Results² Table 1. Relationship Satisfaction Note. *p<.0001. R²=.77, N=177, F (11,165) =51.16, p<.0001.

12. Results³ Table 2. Relationship Longevity Note. *p<.05. R²=.17, N=177, F (11,157)=2.88, p<.01.

13. Results Table 3. Frequency of sexual intercourse Note. *p<.05. **p<.01. ***p<.0001. R²=.21, N=177, F(11, 157)=3.76, p<.0001.

14. Results Table 4. Means for the 3 relationship quality indicators Note. Means in a row are significantly different. Lower means for sex frequency indicate higher frequency of sex.

15. Discussion¹ • 82% of the relationships analyzed can be categorized into romantic and companionate love. • In 64% of those relationships feelings of romantic love were aroused, indicating the vulnerability of young adults to romance. • Relationship Type affected relationship quality • Satisfaction: Companionate love evoked greater overall relationship satisfaction than romantic love. On the average, companionate lovers felt “very satisfied” with their relationship, while romantic lovers were “moderately satisfied”. • The intimacy component, coupled with commitment, played the largest part in satisfaction.

16. Discussion² • Longevity: Companionate love was more durable than romantic love. The mean relationship duration was approximately two-fold longer in companionate love than in romantic love. • Commitment to the partner played the primary role in relationship longevity. On the contrary, passion undermined relationship longevity and/or tended to fade over time. • Sexual Frequency:Romantic lovers had sex more often (>2 times per week) than companionate lovers (1-2 times per week). • Passion was proven to be the major motivating factor for frequent sexual intercourse. The levels of activity were also enhanced by relationship satisfaction. However, participants highly committed to their relationship tended to enjoy sex less often.

17. Conclusion & limitations • It became apparent that both Romantic and Companionate love contribute to relationship quality. • Romantic Love -rooted in passion- heightens sex frequency. Despite the ephemeral nature of desire, romantic lovers enjoy sexual happiness. • Companionate Love or the so-called “true love” -by the aid of intimacy- meet one’s deeper needs for affection resulting in greater satisfaction. At the same time relational exclusivity -promoted by commitment- enhances temporal continuity of the loving relationship. • A longitudinal study, which will involve repeated observations of the same loving relationships over longer periods of time will examine the above conclusions.