WalkaboutzZ

1. WalkaboutzZ Helping men heal from the trauma of suppressed emotions

2. Who are you?

3. Human Development •     Spirit touches matter and consciousness results; this consciousness, touched with memory and expectation, can become bondage or freedom.  –Nisargadatta

4. From narcissism to selective selflessness • Behavior • Inherited • genetic • Learned • Adaptive…..growth • Healing • Compulsive……stuck • Healing is stalled…..environmental elements out of balance such as pollution, bad habits

5. Human Development 2 • Ego: a necessary tool • Survival • A lens of understanding • collecting information • categorizing • Enhancement • Selective • Growth producing • Harmonious • personality

6. EGO ……. …..a combination of present awareness combined with past understanding developing an intention of influencing/bringing about an outcome in the physical, emotional and mental worlds. Indivdual : everyone develops an ego Group: in a group we feel the emotions of others see, hear, We can as a group experience the same thought of another and develop it with a deep sense of commitment and cohesiveness

7. Trauma Individual: Psychological trauma is the unique individual experience of an event or enduring conditions, in which: The individual's ability to integrate his/her emotional experience is overwhelmed, or. The individual experiences (subjectively) a threat to life, bodily integrity, or sanity. Defined: E. Giller, Sidran Institute The individual may feel emotionally, cognitively, and physically overwhelmed. The circumstances of the event commonly include abuse of power, betrayal of trust, entrapment, helplessness, pain, confusion, and/or loss. You can have countless traumas and they will all be recorded in your memory

8. Trauma residue Until the initial threats are perceived as out of existence, the potential for reoccurrence continues. All that is needed to resume the perception frozen in the original experience is something in the environment, no matter how small, to be recognized by the memory as similar to the original trauma.

9. PTSD=Regression=Result of Trauma • Regression is fear-based perception/vantage pt and resulting thought, feeling and behavior arriving in the present moment from experiences which have already happened. • Change thought with present intention

10. Wife: honey, are you angry about something? No, I’m fine….

11. Anger….what is it? ……an intense state of arousal designed to protect individuals from harm Our attention narrows and becomes locked onto the target of our anger. Soon we can pay attention to nothing else. In quick succession, additional brain neurotransmitters and hormones (among them adrenaline and noradrenaline) are released which trigger a lasting state of arousal. We’re now ready to fight.

12. Anger 2 “I’d rather be angry than vulnerable”

13. Anger or vulnerability & fear? Boys experience threat, pain and social exclusion for demonstrating fear, apprehension, “girl” behavior The intensity and power of emotional bullying of boys occurs at levels which deeply impact boys’ sense of safety in relation to their own emotions. Feeling that they will die emotionally if they show fear or vulnerability, they learn instead to show anger Anger, violence, loudness, dominance are valued in the underdeveloped male personality. Despite the discomfort that accompanies them, they become preferred emotions in the case of vulnerability or anger. Grown men regularly revert to anger when they feel vulnerable.

14. Addiction to anger as avoiding fear

15. Addiction • a deeply rooted thought/behavior combination started and stuck in an experience and resulting belief that there is only one (no way) way to deal with this trauma and the after effects of this trauma

16. During Regression • Your usual identity is replaced by: • Memory • Aggregate memory • Words/images leading to aggregate memory

18. Healing • To heal anything which is damaged requires loving attention in the present moment • There never has been anything wrong with me • Trauma convinced me that I was not good enough b/c I couldn’t avoid or change what happened….I felt inadequate (Z forgiveness) • We are here to love each other and bring compassion to suffering.

19. During Intentional Regression • Something in memory is replaced • by something more real

20. Recognizing present perfection, harmony, intelligence (HI) • Senses (eyes, ears, skin, organs) attentive to the present will result in a calmer slower body. • Depression is a slowing of compulsive negative thinking and expectation. The body seeks escape from the subconscious fear.

22. Vulnerability without anger • Bring compassion to unreal isolation, i.e. experience of imagined vulnerability • PTSD is the result of noncompassionate (insensitive) interaction between an individual and the world “out there” that results in overwhelming pain. Parents/ gangs, weather

24. I can’t stop thinking….if I do I’ll die • Actually it’s the ego which will begin to evaporate

25. Mindfulness • The simple “aware state” with no thought, is the creative state out of which all emotions including anger are arising • From this state we are able to watch and understand the circumstances of emotional response. • This includes thought watching….thought is awareness of the future and past • Yes this is meditation. Yes it’s like sitting on a hot coal at times

26. Understanding You are right here right now but may not know it • Hand in glove……..awareness inhabits the body and everything around it. Let’s watch • our posture • our breath • our awareness • When our awareness is focused on future or past rather than your breath.

27. Walking the line…. Emotional reference points • Draw a timeline of your life • Mark your birth and the present • Answer this question by placing a mark, date and circumstance on the line for the answer you get: What • haven’t you recovered from?

28. You are more than your body • Where is the body of your one year old self? • Where is the body of your twenty year old self? • Who is making those judgements? • Watch your breath and label the “in” and “out” of each breath silently in your mind. • Notice the observer in-between breaths which is watching and judging the “in” or “out” status. • Four notions of fear diamond sutra • Self…….this body is me • Pairs of extremes……birth qnd death….being/nonbeing…… self and other….eternity and annihilation….nothing is permanent…..middle path …..the flame manifests, being there before, during and after…..reality transcends the notion of being and non being………same and different are to be thrown away

29. The Body Believes • No difference between thought and reality • The body is in the present where it belongs • When mind focuses on past or future conflict, the body responds with heightened anxiety and self-preserving behaviors • Understanding conflict in conditioned responses requires stopping or releasing thinking and becoming present.

31. Conditioned behavior • Conditioning sets up “compulsive” behavior. Once a behavior is “set” the body including emotions, thoughts and physical movements, acts automatically, compulsively • Physical: behaviors • Mental: judgements • Emotional: preset feelings

32. EGO 2 • Destruction • Trauma

33. Is memory reality?No, memory is not reality • Death happened but it is not reality • Reality is only the present, anything else is a projection, based on experiencess from the past.

34. Past Presence Future • Time doesn’t exist in the present • An idea or thought of mind may exist in the present while being absorbed in the future or past • Time exists in mind when we stretch awareness into the future and the past • Your body is in the present and will be totally fine so long as no danger is introduced • Saber toothed tiger • Slipping on ice on a mountainside

35. Anger Definition Psychology of Anger Harry Mills, Ph.D. Anger is a natural and mostly automatic response to pain of one form or another (physical, mental or emotional). Anger can occur when people don't feel well, feel rejected, feel threatened, or experience real or imagined loss. The type of pain (pems)does not matter; the important thing is that pain is unpleasant and demands our awareness and response, except in the most unusual circumstnces. Because anger never occurs in isolation but rather is necessarily preceded by painful feelings, it is often characterized as a 'secondhand' emotion. Pain alone is not enough to cause anger. Anger occurs when pain is combined with some anger triggering thought. Interpretation of the present happens through thought, conscious and subocnscious, intentional and authomatic. Pain amplifies the assessment process’ importance. A sharp pain that rates 8 or 9 of 10 doesn’t demand the same quickness of response that

36. What constitutes an anger triggering thought? Thoughts that can trigger anger include personal assessments, assumptions, evaluations, or interpretations of situations that have already decided someone else is attempting (consciously or not) to hurt them. Subconscious determination (memory) is necessary for judgement of danger/threat. In this sense, anger is a social emotion; You always have a target that your anger is directed against (even if that target is yourself). Feelings of pain, combined with anger-triggering thoughts motivate you to take action, face threats and defend yourself by striking out against the target you think is causing you pain.

37. Anger 1 A Substitute Emotion Anger can also be a substitute emotion. …….sometimes people make themselves angry so that they don't have to feel some other pain. People change their feelings of pain into anger because it feels better to be angry than it does to be in pain. This changing of pain into anger may be done consciously or unconsciously. Being angry rather than simply in pain has a number of advantages, primarily among them distraction. People in pain generally think about their pain. However, angry people think about harming those who have caused pain. Part of the transmutation of pain into anger involves an attention shift – from self-focus to other-focus. Anger thus temporarily protects people from having to recognize and deal with their painful real feelings; you get to worry about getting back at the people you're angry with instead. Making yourself angry can help you to hide the reality that you find a situation frightening or that you feel vulnerable.

38. Addiction • Experiences • PEMS • Thought is a combination of pe and m • Form • Feeling • Perceptions • Mental formations • consciousness

39. Regressionn Integrating self Bridge Regressed self

40. Basic Assumptions • You can’t do anything outside of the present moment

41. Trauma Responses Re-experiencing: Reliving what happened Thinks a lot about what happened to him/her Has bad dreams or nightmares Gets upset or has physical symptoms (headache, stomachache, heart beating fast) at reminders of what happened Avoidance: Staying away from reminders Doesn’t want to talk about what happened or tries to push it out of his / her mind Wants to stay away from people, places, or things that are reminders of what happened Afraid of something that s/he was not afraid of before (or a previous fear or worry seems to get worse) Not interested in usual activities, since the injury Not interested in being with people s/he usually likes, since the injury Hyper-arousal: Feeling anxious or jumpy Worries a lot that something else bad will happen Startles easily – for example, jumps if there is a sudden noise Irritable or has angry outbursts, since the injury Has trouble paying attention to things, since the injury

42. Group trauma Group: Defined: E. Giller Psychological trauma is the unique group experience of an event or enduring conditions, in which: The group ability to integrate emotional experience is overwhelmed, or. The group experiences (subjectively) a threat to life, bodily integrity, or sanity. The group may feel emotionally, cognitively, and physically overwhelmed. The circumstances of the event commonly include abuse of power, betrayal of trust, entrapment, helplessness, pain, confusion, and/or loss.

43. Trauma, anger and regression Regression is confused behavior when the appropriate response from the past , which might have been life saving, appears in the present circumstances which those around us do not see as threatening. Remedial interatcion is what we are doing with intentional healing regression……we are remediating, like a remedial math or reading class….picking up where the skill development stalled out

44. Regression • Anger is meant to avert death • But often is used when there is no threat at all, just memory. Regression is an automatic/subconscious action of moving back and forth to find where the strength is, to avert pain and death

45. Automatic regression • Sudden anger, fear, hopelessness • Emotional coil that has been pushed down and springs back with more power than is needed b/c it is not responding to the weight of the present, but the past.

46. Integrating Self • You have two choices • Stay where you are in the scene you have been experiencing since you got trapped there. • Come into the presaent where I am and be with me, and I will protect and nurture and love you.

47. Intentional Regression

48. Pieces to the regression puzzle • Post traumatic stress disorder PTSD • Post traumatic growth order PTGO (Gary Keil, Leaders ) • Emotional trauma pattern: Identify the clue of emotionality in the present or near present. • Integrating self • Regressed self (memory, for our purposes only traumatic) • Bridge of transition/power/higher consciousness

49. Using the body in healing regressions • Stored memory retrieval is instantaneous • Regressive responses vary in the degree of intensity depending on initial intensity of fear and pain • The body gets confused with competing stimuli from past and present, and will default to the stimulus that holds the most emotional charge. • Regression • Present

50. Using the body in healing regressions 2