Coaching for Improved Performance:

1. Coaching for Improved Performance: 9.18.12 Engaging confidently in critical conversations

2. By the end of this session, you will have… • Considered conversation skills and behaviors that contribute to the building of successful relationships and extraordinary leadership • Participated in a structured conversation • Engaged in collaborative problem-solving

3. Susan Scott, Fierce Conversations Our lives are a series of relationships, the success or failure of which happen one conversation at a time. Extraordinary leadership is the result of having fierce conversations with ourselves first and then with others. Only then can any of us hope to provide the caliber of leadership that our organizations need and desire.

4. Using a structure to facilitate the conversation • Be clear about what you want from the conversation and what you do NOT want from the conversation: • What do I want for myself? • What do I want for others? • What do I want from the relationship? • How would I behave if I really wanted those results?

5. Using a structure to facilitate the conversation • Establish a mutual purpose: • Find a shared goal—it immediately reduces stress • Clarify the common outcome

6. Using a structure to facilitate the conversation • Establish respect by finding common ground(emotions can run high when people feel disrespected) • STATE your course: • Share your facts (start with least controversial and most persuasive) • Tell your story (explain what you are beginning to conclude) • Ask for other’s facts and stories • Talk about what is fact and what is assumption • Encourage differing views

7. Using a structure to facilitate the conversation • Actively listen to understand • Express interest • Respectfully acknowledge emotions • Restate what you have heard to reflect understanding • State your agreement, where fitting • When there are significant differences, compare the two views as opposed to pointing out right and wrong

8. Using a structure to facilitate the conversation • Finish clearly • Determine any action to be taken and by whom • Establish any timelines for completion of actions • Schedule a follow-up time

9. Experience the conversation • Choose a scenario that reflects an area where you would like practice • Take a few minutes to think about what you want from the conversation • Role play • Process the role play

10. Windshield work • Role play the other scenarios