Who Am I?

1. Who Am I? Regina Avery HSP 301 Professionalism and Personal Systems

2. Great Grandmother Bernadette Thomas Ancestry Me Regina Rene’ Riley-Avery • (Last Hereditary Native Princess) • Grandmother • Hazel O. DulayUnderwood • (Native Princess) Dad Robert Ray Riley • Great Grandfather • Chief Edwin Underwood • Mom • Lorena M. Dulay • (Native Princess)

3. Born December 25, 1969 at Harrison Memorial Hospital, Bremerton WA • (I turned 42 this last Christmas! Picture on title slide taken one day before my birthday) • Lived on Bainbridge Island until I was 6 years old. • Lived in Milton, WA . K-6thgrade • Moved to Monroe, WA . 6th - 10th • Back to Bainbridge Island 11th – 12th • One brother, Robert Ray Riley • He’s two years younger Growing up

4. I enjoyed life as a child… I spent every summer with my grandmother who I adored. My grandmother was Native American and my grandfather was Pilipino. We spent our summers working in their berry fields on Bainbridge Isl., camping, hiking, staying at grandma’s cabin at the beach, fishing, crabbing, digging for clams etc.She also taught me skills that I would use for the rest of my life; how to sew (at age 4), bead using a loom, make jam, use a canner (to can vegetables and fish), smoke salmon, use some power tools, lawnmower, chainsaw, and she taught me how to drive a stick shift when I could barely see over the steering wheel! Most of all how to speak up for what you believe in.

5. Socioeconomic Conditions ~ Mostly middle class neighborhood in the back country. Grew up in a very diverse family, although most neighborhoods were not. Often when race or ethnic jokes were made (I’m very fare complexioned) I would wait & then tell them my nationality, it was an eye opener for many! I still do it today. Raised to see all as equals – there was no difference between races. Most memorable childhood experience-mom picked up a student who was treated as an outcast while walking in the dark. The 1.5ft mohawk and piercings didn’t mean a thing to her. I was friends with all at school and didn’t differentiate anyone.

6. I like to think growing up is a continual process something we do till the end. Definingme! • Mom, friend, daughter, granddaughter, niece • Culturally diverse • Curiosity – openness to learn new things • Persistence – complete tasks regardless of obstacles • Love – value close relationships, • Forgiving , hopeful • Creative, love to learn new things • Open minded Grew up ridding dirt bikes & horses Skiing, camping, hiking Love outdoors Responsible, fare, gratitude Well rounded Tom boy at heart Baseball coach while kids in school My boys mean everything to me… I could not have been blessed with children any more considerate or kind!

7. Jaecen Wise before his time! Teachers commended him for truthfulness, ability to advocate & stand up for what’s right now matter what peers thought. Adrenaline junkie, very athletic, friend you can trust & count on. Great big brother, hard worker & will fight for what’s right. Will yell at the top of his lungs “Mom I LOVE YOU on campus”! His friend’s are all so close – there like my kids as well. I know at any given time, I could count on them. Junior at WSU – Criminal Justice Program He insisted I stay at his frat for mom’s weekend so I was close… Taekwondo – after 2 months of training he placed 1st at State, at 4 months placed 2nd Nationally. His best friend did not have medical & was denied service. So, he literally stitched up his friends finger.

8. Josh To smart for his own good, would sit back, watch, observe and learn from his brothers mistakes. He didn’t talk until he was 3 because big brother did everything for him. He was very shy, a closet comedian, and within the last few years busted out. Has always been athletic and adventurous. Loves his dogs and helps train them. Hard to believe he’s gone from chocolate face to graduating this year.

9. ~ Cultural Trauma from the Past ~ I am also interested in helping Native American’s. Issues are a little more delicate and rapport is difficult to achieve. Based on past history Native’s have an inability to a trust. At the age of 5 the government took my grandmother away from her family and placed her in residential school. The Catholic Church inflicted physical and emotional abuse for 8 years of her life before she ran away.She was caught and returned but while she was out she spoke to family. Running away was to bring attention to the starvation, physical and sexual abuse of the children. At a young age she understood her right to speak, being a Hereditary Princess and of High Born Status. Attended Kuper Isl. Residential School

10. Our family/people were from a matrical society. My G. Gma was a hereditary princess. This was handed down to each 1st born female in the family. I am the last princess in family because I had two boys. When I was about 4 years old I asked how you get a name. I was told that it’s handed down from a deceased ancestor. I apparently told my see-la (g. grandmother) that I did not want a dead person’s name. So she gave me her name personally. Culture G. Grandfather Chief Qua-Dee-Mut (Means he who works for his people) Family naming – We were all given Native names from our ancestors. I have always looked to my grandmother for strength. She was also raised during a time of pre-arranged marriages and it was what royalty did. She had the strength and will power to tell her father as an only child she was not going to marry someone she didn’t know or love.

11. Dad I grew up as daddy’s little girl but always knew something was off. He at times had a hidden temper but I didn’t see it much but a few times. Once he shoved me against a wall for not washing my hair the night before. When I used to wash it in the morning before school because it was long and would get tangled from sleeping. Then he had this weird obsession with trying to make my brother and I like vegetables. He used to pour Tabasco sauce in our mouths if we did not eat the vegetable chosen. To no avail , this caused me to grow up with a huge aversion to most vegetables especially green ones. By the time I was thirteen I really knew he was up to something and figured out he was cheating on my mom. When I was sixteen my mom finally figured it out. He left and married my babysitter from when I was about three. I never hated him for any of it and figured things happen for a reason. When my kids were born I figured they had a right to know who granfather was and they used to hang with him. He was a great grandfather taking them camping, teaching them how to run heavy equipment, and horseback ridding.

12. Josh and I both love photography (he took the first 4 pictures)

13. My World Keeping up with 2 very energetic outgoing boys. We went camping & hiking while josh was still in a portable crib. As they got a little older I taught them to ride dirt bikes at 3 & 5, fishing and skiing. Look who crashes and goes to bed early with the dogs! Not me (there 17 & 19 in that picture napping). We were all born in December. Josh & I were both born on Christmas. Loving brothers and best friends to the end!

14. Cudjo-my smallest dog was just down right mean. Prior owner had to muzzle her taking 2 people to trim her nails. She had specific spots on her body that if you touched she would bite. Within a week I had all bad habits cured. Rescue Pets My bird was alsoanabused rescue pet. All my pets were rescued but my beagle Lacey. She was extra special to me! I trained her to know sign, ring a door bell to go potty, play hide and seek (in case kids were ever lost camping), and close the door when she came in. I had the pleasure to work with a traumatic brain injury student for 4 yrs. When we first met there was a lack of motivation and that was understandable. One day your walking the next in a wheelchair for life. I had Lacey certified as a service dog just to work with him. She gave him the courage learn how to drive his wheelchair, participate in PT, and would go down the slide on his command. She became his moving legs. I had to put her down about 6 months ago. Naiya – big fox hound was abused and afraid everything. She’s currently an awesome babysitter and loves to snuggle. She was given up because of bad behaviors (which didn’t take long to overcome). She would lay on floor and allow the bird to walk on her.

15. ~ Friends ~ • I wish I was able to stay in touch with my old friends before moving– but as life changes, families happen, we become busy and grow a distant. • But we all know if anyone is in need we are a phone call away! • Friends come in all ages – including blue hair on game day! These crazy nuts were instant friends from day one too ;o) I met Bobbi while on vacation. She’s serves in the Air Force. It was like meeting an instant 15 new friends with all her co-workers. • Hollie and I both work with special needs students at the High School Level. • Kelly and I became friends instantly the day we met.

16. I Am a Survivor! Within our own chaos we have learned to survive… Thus making me stronger in the end! ~ Specialists tell my mom & I how special I am because I don’t fit within the norm by far ~ Took 30 yrs to diagnose rare sleep disorder Constantly hear 3 tones ringing in ears & vertigo When I had my kids – 1st kid 3 epidural's & spinal block nothing worked. 2nd kid 3x’s normal amt. in a spinal block nothing worked. Car accident 2 yrs ago – Finally someone heard my pleas of pain. My clavicle’s dislocated at sternum, I need shoulder surgeryand elbow reconstruction. This is the medical field – I was told I was fine the whole time. My mom is my “rock-& savior” in difficult situations! OR when I’m laid up She’s my nurse, chauffeur & cook. Foot surgery less than 2 wks ago. 19 yrs. to diagnose (found old chart dated 93’).

17. Further Education ? • Age 20 enrolled at Olympic College taking prerequisites • Surprise baby on the way • College on hold • Life comes to a halt - after 16yrs of marriage husband said he’s moving out • Reality hits after 16 year old son has heart to heart talk withme • Return back to college after 18yrs • College not moving fast enough-step it up to full time • Am I nuts college & wk full time? • Made President’s List 3 times & Dean’s List - I actually called my college asking what it meant. I had never heard of the Dean’s or President’s list prior. • Graduated AAS Transfer Degree with Honors - summer 2011 • *MOST gratifying academic moment was graduation because I had a “counselor advise” me to give up my first quarter back after being out of school for eighteen years. • NOW I’m at WWU… Great difficulty academically Native tutor elementary through Jr. High Moved Jr. year to Bainbridge Isl. High School and I fell through cracks & my grades plummeted No help was provided I lived with my grandmother my Jr. & Sr. year working through H.S. 3 days after graduation – I was hired out of town and moved NO after graduation fun! I started working at the age of 14.

18. How I cope when stressed! In all honesty – this was a 1st and it felt good. I took my printer and hucked it across the room. Put it back together, all was good and it worked. My friends didn't believe me. But on a normal bases I will take my dogs out, meet a friend, go on a walk, and just breathe. I have even gone as far as just laid in the yard and asked “grandmotherwhat should I do now”.

19. ~ Things that are hard for me ~ Accepting praise – I don’t mind being told I did a good job but it’s hard when I am told by a lot of people that I have done well. I like to think if we work as a team we should find positives in our team efforts as a whole. When things involve my children. I have no issues with following through or disciple. My recent hurdles are convincing the medical field that my son has been in pain for the last 2 years. I’m told he’s young, has good grades, he’ll recover and he should play sports. Hewould almost be in tears from pain after soccer. I’ve seen his poor range of motion, lack of sleep, pleas for me to rub his neck/back, and his frustration. What teenager is up at 3am and only gets 4-5 hours of sleep? I’ve slept in the same room experiencing his restlessness and I was exhausted! Seeing how the system treats others. I don’t understand it and would like to make a change and help others so they don’t have to leap through massive hurdles like we have.

20. Relationships constructed through interaction • I have my friends • And then I have my friends - who all have wide varying backgrounds ie: drug rehab, state assistance, almost homeless, ex-cons, repeat juvenile offenders, massive dating through match.com (fear of being alone), shopaholics to the point of massive debt. I don’t see or treat any of these individuals any different than the next. We all have issues. • Then there are people you just meet along the way Tasks that come easy in life Working with anyone in need. I see the potential in everyone. People are just drawn to me. Working in high stress, fast, tedious, and stressful situations. Higher risk jobs. The ones others tend to shy from. Working with highly aggressive children. Working with children who have physical limitations and mentally disabilities of all ranges. Working with children who are medically fragile-needing specific medical attention.

21. Connection to nature • Your asking someone who can’t wait for summer so she can sleep on the porch and count bats and stars. The boys and I used to take off and go camping for a week at time, we’d play in the mud, watch sunsets & sunrises. • The wilderness would always seeks us out. How many are brave enough to sleep outside when it’s 17degrees out for 2 nights when your son says “mom want to sleep outside with me”?

22. How I perceive my self Lucky/Fortunate Compassionate Persevering Enduring / Caring Nurturing Adaptable/Quick to Learn Good communicator Activator Includer

23. How other’s perceive me Intuitive Good listener Advocate for other’s and self Goal orientated Organized Empathetic/Calm/Kind Adaptable to any situation Good communicator

24. Why I want to be a helper! because I love what I do • I find that adolescents regardless of age, race or disability are so individually unique that I still have so much to learn with an open mind and heart. I see potential in every child. I know it takes time, understanding, patience, and compassion to allow a child to evolve and build confidence in themselves so they will want to learn and grow.I specifically like working with adolescents who have highly aggressive behaviors, special needs, fragile health and physical abilities believing we are all worthy. I enjoy working with children of all ages and they like working with me. • In pursuing this further, Ihave found many individuals do not have the patience or “take the time to be patient” while working with youth. I find that this trait in a helper is not easily taught and if the helper possesses a fear while working in this type of situation it does not benefit anyone. It’s all about “waiting for a child to process what’s going on around them before they can open up and trust”. • I have been lucky enough to be a part of these wonderful transformations. Our youth have adults give up on them all the time, feeling discarded and unwanted. I also have aspirations to assist and advocate for those who are non –verbal. I have been in the field for twelve years and love every day. I know that I can be a positive influence and make a difference in the lives of young people.

25. The End ~ The End ~