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Comparing Weddings: Indonesia vs. the United States

This overview explores the distinct traditions and practices surrounding weddings in Indonesia and the United States. In the United States, weddings often emphasize love, with the bride's family taking on significant planning responsibilities and ceremonies held in religious settings. Common elements include bridal showers, rehearsals, and lively receptions. In contrast, Indonesian weddings often involve arranged marriages, elaborate ceremonies that signify full adult status, and a strong emphasis on kinship, with numerous gift exchanges. Join us as we delve into these cultural differences.

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Comparing Weddings: Indonesia vs. the United States

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  1. Weddings Indonesia and the United States Emma Espel

  2. United States • Marriage for LOVE • Groom may ask bride’s parents out of courtesy • Wedding planner • Bride’s family pays

  3. Ceremonies • Bridal Shower • Rehearsal Dinner • Ceremony • Reception • *Honeymoon

  4. The Wedding • Usually in a religious setting • Mainly Christian in the US • White wedding dress/veil • Religious leader

  5. The Wedding (Cont’d) • The wedding party • Ushers, Bride’s maid, Best man, Flower girls, Ring bearer, Music • Wedding vows • Exchange of rings • Kiss • Wheat or rice

  6. Reception • Guestbook • Food • Greet the couple • Dancing

  7. Guests • Family and friends • Gifts from registries or money • Dress up • Some only come to the reception

  8. Indonesia • Each clan is different! • Marriage symbolizes “full adult status” • Before the Wedding • Parents arrange OR • Marriage for love • Supports kinship • Many gift exchanges occur

  9. Java, Indonesia • Arrangement of Marriage • The greater the social status, the greater chance of arranged marriage. • The groom’s family usually stays out of all of the organization. • Sometimes there is a “make-up woman,” who is like a wedding planner (Pemaes)

  10. Ceremonies • Traditional engagement • Bathing ceremony • Relatives all meet the night before at the bride’s home. • Wedding Ceremony • Reception

  11. The Wedding • The bride and groom approach each other • Throw bundles of betel leaves • Groom crushes an egg, and the bride washes his feet • Wedding chair • Couple sits on the lap of the groom’s father. • Then the couple sits in the chair.

  12. Wedding (cont’d) • Exchange of wedding rings • The bride gets certain gifts from the groom. • They eat and drink together • The couple kneels and the parents bless them

  13. Guests • Weddings are for everyone! • Fancy invitations. • Asks not to bring flowers or gifts • It is an insult not to attend • Most people come only to the reception. • Guests dress nicely

  14. Reception • Guests arrive at the reception after the wedding. • Dancers precede the couple • Family speeches • The guests greet the couple and eat • Alcohol and dancing are considered rude

  15. Java vs. United States • Both have: • Differences across the board • Bride’s family does a lot of the planning • A wedding planner • Parents give away the couple • Wedding Rings

  16. United States Full adult status at 18 No chair Gifts from registry or money Friends and family Dancing, alcohol at reception Many shorter speeches Java vs. United States • Java • “full adult status” • Arranged marriage • Only money gifts • Everyone invited • Entertainment is dancers • Long speeches

  17. "You may now kiss the Bride"

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