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Families with Problems. Living Through Divorce. Sometimes families experience difficulties beyond those that they can solve by themselves. They may need help of marriage counselors, religious leaders, friends, and family members.
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Living Through Divorce • Sometimes families experience difficulties beyond those that they can solve by themselves. They may need help of marriage counselors, religious leaders, friends, and family members. • If current trends continue, a little less than half of the marriages formed today will eventually end in divorce. • Among children who live with parents ¼ live in one-parent families. • In cases where conflict between parents causes extreme anxiety and pain to family members, divorce may prevent further injury.
Living Through Divorce • Divorce requires everyone to adapt. Most children adapt to the changes and live normally. Some however, do not adjust quickly and can experience depression. • Both parents and children can feel hurt, lonely, or angry over a divorce, even if the previously intact family unit was destructive. • Some children and teens will feel that one or both parents do not love them or that the divorce was their fault. • In advance of a divorce, parents should tell their children where they will live and with whom. Children will need time to prepare for changes as new homes, friends, and schools. • The parents should talk with the children and listen to their concerns. The parents need to remind them it is not their fault and that they are still loved.
Factors That Often Surround Divorce • Limited Income- Money is short, frustration and conflict may grow. • Great differences in values and backgrounds- People who have grown up in different social settings possess different values and may think and act in unharmonious ways. • Come from divorced families- People whose parents are divorced may be afraid to trust a relationship, and may be quick to discard it. Divorce may seem familiar and “acceptable” to them.
Allowing Time to Heal • Grieve- to feel keen emotional pain and suffering over a loss. • It is normal to grieve for the family that is gone or parent that is gone. • It takes time to build new families, especially with stepparents. • No family is perfect. • All families require effort and cooperation to succeed.
Dysfunctional Families • Dysfunctional family- is a family with abnormal or impaired ways of coping that injure the self-esteem and emotional health of family members. • Teens who live in dysfunctional families should seek help outside of the immediate family. • Active abuse- abuse involving one person’s aggression against another. • Passive abuse- abuse involving not taking needed actions, such as neglecting to provide food or shelter to a dependent victim.
Dysfunctional Families • All families face problems. No family is perfectly healthy nor totally unhealthy. • Healthy families do not remain upset. • Dysfunctional families often have members who have: • Alcoholism or drug addictions, or long-term mental or physical illnesses • Fail to abide by society’s laws and values. • Lack parenting skills or social skills. • Fail to engage in productive work.
Family Violence and Abuse • Child abuse- is verbal, psychological, physical, or sexual assault on a child. Almost 1,500 children die each year at the hands of their abusers. • People who abuse children are emotionally unhealthy, low self-esteem, and little power among adults. • Spouse/partner abuse- verbal, psychological, physical, or sexual assault on a spouse or partner. • Can happen to anyone regardless of race, gender, religion, sexual orientation. It affects all people regardless of background and education levels.
Family Violence and Abuse • Elder abuse- is verbal, psychological, physical, or sexual assault on an older adult. • An estimated 1-2 million older adults are physically abused each year. • Family violence occurs when other problems worsen an existing emotional problem. • Alcohol and drugs are strongly linked with child abuse. • Abuse can be passed down from each generation until someone seeks help. • A child who is rescued and supported can recover and achieve a high-level of emotional health. • Abuse is a learned behavior and abusers must first recognize that abusing others is wrong. • Asking for help is a courageous act. • Reporting the incident to the authorities can help prevent future abuse.
Society’s Support of Families • Day care- is supervision, usually at a facility, for preschool children or older adults who must be supervised during daytime working hours. • Society has changed drastically over the last 50 years. Both parents work, teens work. Today women have larger roles in today’s society. • Society may need to develop facilities to care for dependent members of the family. Another maybe to combine day care for all ages. Also employers develop flexible work schedules.
