Tough Talks Tough Talks A GUIDE TO HANDLING THE MOST DIFFICULT BUSINESS CONVERSATIONS
"Experience is valuable only if it's imbued with meaning from which one can draw salient conclusions. Otherwise, experience becomes imprisoning." -- Barry McCaffrey, general
Tough Talks Agenda • Introduce • Practice • Review
Tough Talks Key Message Tough Talks forge relationships that invigorate business performance and promote individual and collective wellbeing. They directly address the social, emotional and educational needs of individuals and are an essential skill for all business leaders.
Tough Talks What is a Tough Talk? A conversation between two or more people that addresses an important gap in behavior or performance and ends with clear commitments to win-win solutions.
Tough Talks When Do I Need to Have a Tough Talk? Emotionally upset Unsettled conscience Impacted behavior Acting out When the current state of an important relationship is impending performance and/or disturbing your peace.
Tough Talks Won’t It Just Work Itself Out? Tough Talks takes sacrifice and risk to overcome resistance: There are too many obstacles Out of my comfort zone I’m Afraid I don’t know how I feel vulnerable
Tough Talks Tough Talks Bring Significant Rewards YOU I feel engaged I have closer and more collaborative relationships. I gained new capabilities and confidence. They see me as a leader YOUR SPHERE OF INFLUENCE I made a difference. We addressed core issues and grew from it. We worked through it easier than I thought we would. I won the respect of my peers MANKIND Our company is now able to perform at a higher frequency and help the world.
Tough Talks Tough Talks Bring Significant Rewards Fear Confidence Separation Connection Powerlessness Personal and Social Power Exceptional Performance Low Performance
Tough Talks Our role as leaders is to challenge the inequality and command/control myths that exist in our companies and in ourselves rather than socialize everyone to accept the status quo.
Tough Talks Tough Talk Values • Personal Responsibility • Emotional Intelligence (social-emotional awareness) • Resiliency • Emotional Intelligence (social-emotional awareness)
Tough Talks 1. Engaging in Tough Talks is a habit not a talent 2. Look at everyone as a growth stock 3. Each person is a teacher and a student 4. Mutual respect and mutual purpose is the foundation of success 5. You are not your evaluation of yourself, nor are you the evaluation of them
Tough Talks “I am not bound to win, but I am bound to be true. I am not bound to succeed, but I am bound to live up to what light I have.” - Abraham Lincoln