Gender and Sex

2. Gender and Sex • Sex is a designation based on biology • Gender is socially and psychologically constructed

3. Gender • Neither innate nor necessarily stable • Acquired through interaction in a social world • Changes over time • We are born male or female • We learn to be masculine or feminine

4. Gendered speech communities • Labov defines a speech community as existing when a group of people share a set of norms regarding communicative practices

5. The lessons of child play • We can gain insight into how boys and girls learn norms of communication by observing them at play • Boys and girls learn how to talk and how to interpret what one another says during play • Young children almost always play in sex-segregated groups and play different kinds of games

6. Boys games • Are competitive, have clear goals, include physically rough play, and are organized by rules and roles • Little need to discuss how to play • Individuals status depends on standing out, being better, and dominating other players • Engage in more heckling, storytelling, interrupting and commanding • Usually involve fairly large groups

7. Boys communication rules • Use communication to assert your ideas, opinions, and identity • use talk to achieve something • Use communication to attract and maintain others’ attention • Use communication to compete for the “talk stage,” Make yourself stand out; take attention away from others and get others to pay attention to you

8. Girls’ games • Tend to play in pairs or in very small groups • Do not have preset, clear-cut goals, rules, and roles • Players talk among themselves to decide what they’re doing and what roles they have • Lack of stipulated goals cultivates an interest in the process of interaction • Girls have to cooperate and work out problems by talking

9. Girls Communication Rules • Use communication to create and maintain relationships. The process of communication, not its content, is the heart of relationships • Use communication to establish egalitarian relationships with others. Don’t outdo, criticize, or put others down. If you have to criticize, be gentle • Use communication to include others – bring them into conversations, respond to their ideas • Use communication to show sensitivity to others and relationships

10. Feminine Speech • Communication is a primary way to establish and maintain relationships with others – “RAPPORT” • Talk IS the essence of relationships: foster connections, support, closeness and understanding • Equality between people is important

11. Feminine Speech • Show support for others – attention to the relationship level of communication • Conversational maintenance work • Inclusivity – responsiveness • Personal, concrete • Tentativeness

12. Masculine Speech • Communication is a way to exert control, preserve independence, entertain and enhance status – “REPORT” • Use talk to establish and defend personal status and ideas by asserting themselves, telling jokes and stories, or by challenging others

13. Masculine Speech • Speak to exhibit knowledge, skill or ability • Avoid personal disclosures • Instrumental • Conversational command • Direct, assertive

14. Gendered Friendships • Commonalities in Women’s and Men’s Friendships • both women and men value intimate same-sex friends • both agree on basic qualities of close friendships: intimacy, acceptance, trust and help • what women and men want in friendships: trust, intimacy and instrumental assistance

15. Gender-linked patterns in friendship • Communication is central to women friends; activities are primary focus of men’s friendships • Talk between women friends tends to be expressive and disclosive, talk in men’s friendships generally revolves around less personal topics

16. Gender-linked patterns in friendship • Men assume a friendship’s value and seldom discuss it; women are likely to talk about the dynamics of their relationship • Women’s friendships generally appear to be broader in scope than those of men

17. Women’s Friendships: Closeness in Dialogue • Women use talk to build connections • Women exchange information about their daily lives and activities • Talk tends to be personal and disclosive • Talk tends to be expressive and supportive • Talk has explicit focus on the relationship • They state affection explicitly • Talk has breadth

18. Men’s Friendships: Closeness in Doing • Men express closeness through action and activities rather than talk • Women look for confidants; men for companions • Men’s friendships are instrumental; men like to do things for people they care about • Men use “covert intimacy” – joking, razzing, teasing

19. Friendships Between Women and Men • Offer unique challenges and opportunities for growth • Difficult not to see each other in sexual terms • Sex segregation in society • Different speech communities

20. Opposite-Sex Friendships • Each partner has something unique to offer the friendship • Women provide personal support • Men offer activities to increase closeness • Women benefit from friendship that is more fun; companionship less emotionally intense • Men benefit from access to emotional and expressive support • Both sexes seek women friends in time of stress; both women and men more comfortable self-disclosing to women

21. Misinterpretations Between Women and Men • Showing support • “Troubles talk” • The point of the story • Relationship talk • Public speaking