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Academic English iii. September 24 th 2012. Today. A look at coherence. - key nouns and pronouns. - using transitions. Coherence. But first… a word about unity. Unity. Remember: One paragraph = ONE main idea. - Topic sentence. All ideas directly support the topic sentence.
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Academic English iii September 24th 2012
Today • A look at coherence. • - key nouns and pronouns. • - using transitions.
Coherence • But first… • a word about unity.
Unity • Remember: • One paragraph = ONE main idea. • - Topic sentence. All ideas directly support the topic sentence. • For an essay. All supporting paragraphs should directly support the thesis statement.
Unity • Example: I live in a flat with my family. We have two bedrooms and a living room. We have a garden and we have some flowers there. In weekdays I arrive home at five o'clock and I have lunch. Then I do my homework and go to bed. I had a computer but now it doesn't work. I have a brother and a sister and I think I am very lucky to live with them. Sometimes our relatives visit us. Our flat becomes very crowded sometimes but I like it.
Unity • What details don’t fit here (are not describing the house)? I live in a flat with my family. We have two bedrooms and a living room. We have a garden and we have some flowers there. In weekdays I arrive home at five o'clock and I have lunch. Then I do my homework and go to bed. I had a computer but now it doesn't work. I have a brother and a sister and I think I am very lucky to live with them. Sometimes our relatives visit us. Our flat becomes very crowded sometimes but I like it.
Unity • Remember: STAY ON TOPIC.
Coherence • In writing, the sentences must “hold together”. • - This makes the writing easier to read and understand. • - Sentences should be in a logical order. • - Logical movement from one sentence to the other. Do not “jump” suddenly. • - Each sentence should smoothly flow into the next one.
Coherence • There are four ways to achieve coherence: • Repeat key nouns. • Use consistent pronouns. • Use transition signals to link ideas. • Arrange your ideas in logical order.
Gold, a precious metal, is prized for two important characteristics. First of all, gold has a lustrous beauty that is resistant to corrosion. Therefore, it is suitable for jewelry, coins, and ornamental purposes. Gold never needs to be polished and will remain beautiful forever. For example, a Macedonian coin remains as untarnished today as the day it was made 25 centuries ago. Another important characteristic of gold is its usefulness to industry and science. For many years, it has been used in hundreds of industrial applications, such as photography and dentistry. The most recent use of gold is in astronauts’ suits. Astronauts wear gold-plated heat shields for protection when they go outside spaceships in space. In conclusion, gold is treasured not only for its beauty but also for its utility.
Gold, a precious metal, is prized for two important characteristics. First of all, gold has a lustrous beauty that is resistant to corrosion. Therefore, it is suitable for jewelry, coins, and ornamental purposes. Gold never needs to be polished and will remain beautiful forever. For example, a Macedonian coin remains as untarnished today as the day it was made 25 centuries ago. Another important characteristic of gold is its usefulness to industry and science. For many years, it has been used in hundreds of industrial applications, such as photography and dentistry. The most recent use of gold is in astronauts’ suits. Astronauts wear gold-plated heat shields for protection when they go outside spaceships in space. In conclusion, gold is treasured not only for its beauty but also for its utility.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'These insights' is the best answer because 'they' could be ambiguously referring to 'insights', 'e-learning technologies', 'researchers' or 'people'.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text)tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'Screen text' is the best answer because 'it' could refer to 'vision'.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'The user' is the best answer because this is the first time 'the user' has been mentioned in the passage.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'Reading' is the best answer because the pronoun 'it' does not clearly refer to one thing in particular. 'It' could be mistakenly interpreted as referring to 'each line'.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'He' is the best answer because the pronoun clearly refers to Jakob Nielsen, mentioned in the previous sentence. 'The author' is ambiguous since it might be interpreted as referring to the actual writer of the passage.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
‘The files' is the best answer because it explicitly refers to the PDF files mentioned earlier in the sentence. While 'they' is not wrong, it could be misinterpreted as referring to preceding 'users'.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It)suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'The research' is the best answer since it explicitly identifies the subject of the sentence.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'Users' is the best answer since it explicitly states who may be repelled by reading a 'book-like page on screen'. 'Them' could be misinterpreted as referring to 'the files'.
Nouns and pronouns Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. (They/ These insights) were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. (It/ Screen text) tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as (the user/ he or she) descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, (it/reading) becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. (He/ The author) suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless (they/ the files) are first printed out. (The research/ It) suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns (users/ them) away because (the internet/ it) is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.
'The internet' is the best answer because it explicitly states what 'is not a place for reading and studying'. The pronoun 'it' is incorrect because its actual referent (the internet) has not been previously introduced.
Some fascinating insights into the disappointments of e-learning technologies have been revealed by researchers studying the way people read online. These insights were detected using eye-tracking tools that 'map how vision moves and rests' while reading screen text. Screen text tends to be read in a pattern that resembles a capital F. Sentences at the top of a screen page are usually read in full. However, as the user descends the page, fewer words on each line are read and, eventually, reading becomes an almost vertical activity. Indeed, web researcher and usability guru, Jakob Nielsen, claims that 'reading is not even the right word'. He suggests that PDF files represent 'content blobs' to users who will not read them unless the files are first printed out. The research suggests that 'a book-like page on screen' turns users away because the internet is not perceived to be a place for reading and learning.