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COMPLIMENTS, PERSONAL IDIOMS, & GIFTS. WHAT THINGS GET COMPLIM ENTED?. Performance Attire/Appearance Personality/Whole Person Possessions. COMPLIMENT FORM. DIRECT GENERAL NO COMPARISONS LITTLE LIKELIHOOD OF AMPLIFICATION. REPLIES TO COMPLIMENTS. RITUALISTIC/PLEASED ACCEPTANCE (53%)
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WHAT THINGS GET COMPLIM ENTED? • Performance • Attire/Appearance • Personality/Whole Person • Possessions
COMPLIMENT FORM • DIRECT • GENERAL • NO COMPARISONS • LITTLE LIKELIHOOD OF AMPLIFICATION
REPLIES TO COMPLIMENTS • RITUALISTIC/PLEASED ACCEPTANCE (53%) • ACCEPTANCE WITH AMENDMENT • NOT ACKNOWLEDGED • DENIAL
WHO GIVES & GETS COMPLIMENTS? • SAME AGE GROUP (56%) • SAME SEX (64%) • SAME STATUS (71%)
REASONS FOR GIVING COMPLIMENTS • DESERVED (66%) • NORMATIVE • MANIPULATIVE
FUNCTIONS OF PERSONAL IDIOMS • BUILD RELATIONSHIP COHESIVENESS • IDENTIFY & NEGOTIATE BEHAVIORAL NORMS FOR THE RELATIONSHIP
TYPES OF PERSONAL IDIOMS • PARTNER NICKNAMES • EXPRESSIONS OF AFFECTION • LABELS FOR OTHERS OUTSIDE THE RELATIONSHIP • CONFRONTATIONS • REQUESTS AND ROUTINES • SEXUAL REFERENCES & EUPHEMISMS • SEXUAL INVITATIONS • TEASING INSULTS
GIVING GIFTS • TIMING IS IMPORTANT • The unexpected gift • The forgotten gift • The too frequent gifts • The “make up” gift
TAILORING THE GIFT IS IMPORTANT • Give to other’s needs & relationship needs • Stress relationship needs on anniversaries • NEGOTIATION IS IMPORTANT • Norms for when they are expected, costs, etc. • THE RESPONSE IS IMPORTANT