BULLYING

1. BULLYING Gail White School Counselor Martin L. King, Jr. Elementary

2. What is Bullying? • Aggressive behavior or intentional “harm doing” • Carried out repeatedly and over time • Occurs within an interpersonal relationship by imbalance of power

3. “According to the National Education Association every hour of every day 2,000 students are physically attacked on school grounds.”

4. Bullying includes: • People calling you names • Making things up to get you into trouble • Hitting, pinching, biting, pushing and shoving • Taking things away from you • Damaging your belongings • Spreading rumors • Threats and intimidation • Making silent or abusive phone calls • Posting insulting messages on the internet • Taking your friends away from you

5. Other behaviors related to bullying: • Arguing – students with each other • Bossiness • Cliques/Ganging-up • Physically dangerous behaviors to self or others • Self-control issues • Threatening others (staff or students) • Victim– students who is always picked on

6. Legal Implication of Bullying • Title IX Amendment address: severe, persistent harassment that adversely affects a student’s education or creates a hostile or abusive educational environment • Anti-Bullying Act passed in different states • District Framework– Target 2: Safe School • Duty Care • In loco parentis- we are held legally responsible for students while they are in our care • Liability Issues: Negligence– a duty to care, duty was breach, and damage resulted

7. Important things to remember: • Protect the victim so that he/she will not suffer retaliation from the accused.

8. What can and should be done • Resource: The Teacher’s Encyclopedia of Behavior Management (p. 157-185) • Goal: Students will stop the “bullying” and will learn to interact with other students in more positive and socially acceptable ways.

9. The Teacher’s Encyclopedia of Behavior Management • Plan A: For a situation in which the problems has just begun. • Plan B: For students who does not know how to interact with others in more respectful ways. • Plan C: For a student who has trouble managing anger and engages in bullying when angry or frustrated. • Plan D: For a student who bullies because he enjoys exerting power over others.

10. Things we can do as a school to address bullying: • Conflict and dispute resolution curriculums available in all grades. • Close monitoring of cafeterias, playgrounds, and “hot spots” where bullying is likely to occur away from direct supervision. • Behaviors contracts signed by students and parents and written behavior codes for students, teachers, and staff members that are circulated to all parents and students. • Classroom and schoolwide activities designed to build self-esteem by spotlighting special talents, hobbies, interests, and abilities of all students.

11. Teasing DOs and DON’Ts: • DO: • Be careful of others’ feeling • Use humor gently and carefully • Accept teasing from others if you tease • Tell others if teasing about a certain topic hurts your feelings • Know the difference between friendly gentle teasing and hurtful ridicule or harassment • Try to read others’ “body language” to see if their feelings are hurt—even when they don’t tell you. • Help a student when he or she is being ridiculed.

12. Teasing DOs and DON’Ts: • DON’Ts • Tease someone you don’t know well • Tease about a person’s body • Tease about a person’s family members • Tease about a topic when a student has asked you not to • Tease someone who seems agitated or who is having a bad day

13. Friendship is… • Friendships are positive • Between friends, there is give and take • Friends usually have similar issues • Friends share and celebrate their differences • Between friends, there is a balance of power • Friends are kind, respectful, fair, and honest.

14. “Educators must provide wounded children with a view of optimism and hope so they can make healthier choices. In some cases, we must renew our hope, leaving cynicism outside the school’s doors. We can and must make a difference by offering students a core set of nonviolent, educationally relevant values. We must model less violent choices and behaviors and teach the skills needed to make responsible nonviolent choices. Maybe no one can do this all the time, but all of us can do it some of the time.” • Safe and Civil Schools

15. For more information on addressing Bullying issues: • Alexander, Martha G. Move over, twerp. New York: Dial Press (1981). Grade K • Blume, Judy. Blubber. New York: Dell (1976). Grade 4-6 • Bother, Barbara. Mean Maxine. New York: Puffin Books (1981). Grade 4-6 • Cohen-Posey, Kate. How to handle bullies, teasers, and other meanies. Highland City, FL: Rainbow Books (1995) Grade 3-5 • Cosby, Bill. The meanest thing to say. New York: Scholastic, Inc. (1997). Grade K-5 • Johnston, Marianne. Dealing with bullying. New York: Powerkids Press (1996). Grade 3-5 • Sachar, Louis. Marvin Redpost: Why pick on me? New York: Randon House (1993) Grade 4-6

16. Other Resources: • Don’t Laugh At Me www.dontlaugh.org • Why is Everybody Always Picking on Me: A Guide to Handling Bullies by Terrance • The Bullying Prevention Handbook by John H. Hoover & Ronald Oliver • Bully Free Classsroom by Allan L. Beane (Free Spirit Publishing) • Hands are not for hitting by Martine Agassi (Free Spirit Publishing)