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Exploring the Depths of Love: Friendship, Desire, and the Essence of Connection

This exploration dives into the intricate nature of love and friendship, reflecting upon the duality of desire and utility in relationships. It examines different Greek concepts of love—Eros, Philia, and Agape—offering insights into how they shape our perceptions of connection. By addressing themes such as the conflict between pleasure and gain, the importance of mutual respect, and the balance between passion and reason, we uncover the complexities that define enduring relationships. Can true love exist without reciprocity? Let's delve into these philosophical inquiries.

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Exploring the Depths of Love: Friendship, Desire, and the Essence of Connection

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  1. FRIENDSHIP • FRIENDSHIP OF LOVERS • Question of permanence (time) • Immeasurability of love? • Conflict of desire/ motive (telos): • enjoyment vs. gain • Complains: excess of love is not met (though nothing is lovable about her) • Loving for the sake of pleasure/ utility • Non-possession of qualities expected of someone.

  2. GREEK WORDS FOR LOVE • EROS • Intense desire for something: beauty (Platonic) • To love is to love the platonic form of beauty • Not the person but the element present in the person • Sexual desire (erotic) • Present in the desire of the animals • Enduring? • PHILIA • Family, state: appreciation (qualities) of others • Loyalty: job or discipline • Love is being useful and pleasing • Enduring? • AGAPE • Complete vs utility & pleasure • Reciprocity: subj-obj

  3. FRIENDSHIP • IMPORTANT: PERSON OR QUALITIES? • Loving the person rather than the qualities • One who wishes the good • Love starts in attraction (goodwill) • Similar tastes • Loving oneself first • we cannot give that which we don’t have • Something is desirable in us/ something is good in us • Wicked man = duty vs. actions • What he does clashes with what he ought to do • Good man: • what he ought to do, he does • Obeys his reason

  4. PROBLEMS WITH RELATIONSHIP & HAPPINESS • DESTINY AND FREEWILL (pre-determinism) • PASSION VS REASON • MOVE ON, LET GO • SOCIETY

  5. DESTINY & FREEWILL • Belief: soul mates • STOICISM • IRRATIONAL

  6. PASSION VS REASON

  7. MOVE ON, LET GO • ADVANTAGE + PLEASURE • CONSEQUENCES • Ok: if friendship is based on pleasure or utility. • Pretending to love us • If a friend appears to be wicked? • Attempt: Capacity for reformation (change) • Transformation: intellect of a child – intellect of an adult • We can only love what is “good” • “so how are we to know that it just isn’t so… that we just have to let each other go…” • “If loving you is all that means to me, when being happy is all I hope you’d be… then loving you must mean I really have to set you free.”

  8. SOCIETY • GUARANTOR: virtue and happiness • Possible to be of great friend to many people? • One cannot live with many people and divide oneself up among them. • Girl bestfriend and a girlfriend • Muslim culture • Birthday party • “sanadalawaangpusoko”

  9. COMPLETE FRIENDSHIP • Reason • Mutual: dignity as a person • Reciprocity = return made should be fair to both parties • Similarities/ partnership • Sense of living/ sharing together • Pursuit to improve each other = marriage • Not fair to return the equivalent of what one has received? • To render to each class what is appropriate and becoming. • Equal Rights = democracy = polis

  10. Common? • Same sex marriage? • Is there an honor in Suicides?

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