Marrieds and NonMarrieds

1. Marrieds and NonMarrieds An Overview of marrieds, NonMarrieds and Families

2. Outline • Reading discussion • Marriage • Nonmarrieds • Families • Applying theories

3. Reading Discussion • What did you think of the reading? • Were there any parts you liked? Disliked? • What facts and figures stood out to you? • Critically, did you find any issues or gaps in the reading – areas you wish were discussed more, less, research that was confusing, facts that were suspicious?

4. Marriage: An Overview • Marriage • The book defines marriage as: • a legal union between a man and a woman as recognized by most of the United States. • The law defines marriage as: • In California, a personal relation arising out of a civil contract between a man and a woman. This definition may vary by state. • Religion defines marriage as: • a religious rite that may often include precepts of childbearing, sexual relations, living arrangements and religious beliefs/observances • Sociology defines marriage as: • a socially approved sexual and economic relationship between two or more individuals How do these definitions effect the recent debates concerning marriage?

5. Marriage: Laws • Cohabitation Laws as of 2001 were still on the books in seven states but are now no longer typically enforced and are believed to be unconstitutional by some people • Antimiscegenation Laws were the prohibition of interracial marriage, cohabitation or sexual interaction • From the time of slavery through the 1960s, many states had antimiscegenation laws

6. Marriage: Laws

7. Marriage: Trends • 1960: 80% of 25-35 year olds are married • 2000: 55% • 2010: 45% • Why: • Education • Cohabitation • All Things Considered

8. Marriage: Trends

9. Marriage: Indicators of Marital Readiness • Age and maturity • Timing of marriage • Motives • Sexual exclusiveness • Emotional emancipation from parents • Education and vocation established Should any other indicators be added to this list? Do you think some of these indicators are obsolete?

10. Marriage: Advantages • Better physical and emotional health • More wealth and income • Positive social status • More and safer sex • Life-long continuity of intimate relationships • Safer circumstances for children • Longer life expectancy • Lower odds of being crime victims • Enhanced legal and insurance rights and benefits (taxes too) • Higher self-reported happiness What are your thoughts on this list?

11. Marriage: Disadvantages • Large investment of time, emotion and energy • Women’s finances tend to decrease with marriage and the onset of domestic work and/or children • Possible domestic violence and isolation • Takes away from community and social connections – retreating into each other Are there any disadvantages missing from this list?

12. Marriage: Diversity in Types • Monogamy is the practice of marrying (or being in a relationship with) one person at a time. It is still considered the only legal form of marriage in modern western culture • Polygamy is a system of marriage that allows people to have more than one spouse at a time. It is practiced among some subcultures around the world but is not widely acknowledged as a legitimate form of marriage

13. Marriage: Diversity in Types • Polygyny is a system of marriage that allows men to have multiple wives. This is the most common form of polygamy. This form of marriage can be legal in some countries but is most often “spiritual.” Do you think it served a purpose at one time in certain cultures?

14. Marriage: Diversity in Types • Polyandry is a system of marriage that allows women to have multiple husbands. This is a more rare form of polygamy. Polyandry is recognized by some tribal legal systems but is also most often “spiritual.”

15. Marriage: Divorce • Marital Entropy is the principal that if a marriage does not receive preventative maintenance and upgrades it will move towards decay and break down • There are numerous reasons for divorce beyond lack of maintenance What do you find interesting about the main reasons for divorce?

16. Let’s Consider: • Instructions: • Divide yourself into groups • Designate a “speaker” to present your group’s point of view • Take 5 minutes and discuss the following questions Should singlehood be the preferred choice for people under the age of 30? Should the legal age of marriage be raised in the United States? (It ranges from 15, with parents consent, to 18)

17. NonMrarieds • Four types of singles* • Voluntary temporary • Voluntary stable (permanent) • Involuntary temporary • Involuntary stable (permanent) Demographic and Myths of Single Life Do you think there is a stigma attached with not being married by a certain age?

18. NonMrarieds: 4 Types • Involuntary Temporary • Would like to get married and are actively seeking a mate • Voluntary Stable (permanent) • Single by choice and satisfied with that decision • Includes those who have a lifestyle that precludes traditional heterosexual marriage • People who fit in this category • Members of religious orders • Gays and lesbians (although this is changing with civil unions and same-sex marriage legislation)

19. NonMrarieds: 4 Types • Voluntary Temporary • They are open to marriage but place a lower priority on searching for mates than on other activities (education, career, politics) • Involuntary Stable (permanent) • Dissatisfied with their singlehood but feel it is permanent • People who fit in this category • Professional successful women for whom finding a suitable mate is often a problem of demographics – lack of older, well educated single men*

20. NonMrarieds: Statistics • Increase in never-married adults • 2003: 24.4 % of U.S adults 18+ years old • 2006: 73% of 20-29 ♂ year olds • 2006: 62% of 20-29 ♀ year olds • Never-married by Race/Ethnicity • 38.9% of African Americans (over 1/3) • 30.9% of Hispanics (less than 1/3) • 22.2% of Whites (less than ¼)

21. NonMrarieds: Statistics Blacks are almost as likely to be never married as married What else does this graph tell us?

22. NonMrarieds: Statistics By 75, almost everyone has married once

23. Non Marrieds: Same Sex Couples

24. Non Marrieds: Same Sex Couples • Marriage, according to GLAD, is a unique legal status conferred by and recognized by governments the world over. It brings a host of reciprocal obligations,rights and protections. It is a cultural institution and is a fundamental protecting conveying clearly that you and your life partner love each other and are united and belong by each other’s side. No other word has that power, and no other word can provide that protection VS • Civil Union is a legal status created by the sate of Vermont in 2000 and subsequently by the states of Connecticut, New Hampshire, New Jersey, Rhode Island, Illinois, Delaware and Hawaii. It provides legal protection to couples at the state law level, but omits federal protections as well as the dignity, clarity and security and power of the word “marriage”

25. Non Marrieds: Same Sex Couples • As of January 2013, 9 states – Connecticut, Iowa, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York, Vermont and Washington – as well as the District of Columbia and two Native American tribes – have legalized same-sex marriage • In addition, Rhode Island recognizes same-sex marriages performed in other jurisdictions, and California, which briefly granted same-sex marriages in 2008, now recognizes them on a conditional basis • While several jurisdictions have legalized same-sex marriage through court rulings, legislative action, and popular vote, 9 states prohibit same-sex marriage by statute and 30 prohibit it in their constitutions. • The defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), enacted in 1996, prevents the federal government from recognizing same-sex marriages performed in other states. The provision of DOMA has been found unconstitutional in 8 federal courts, including 2 federal appeals courts. 5 of these cases are pending review in the Supreme Court.

26. NonMarrieds: Cohabitation • Cohabitation is living together as a romantically involved, unmarried couple

27. NonMarrieds: Cohabitation • Who cohabitates? • Between 50-60% of new marriages now involve couples who have lived together first • Typical cohabitating couple • Between 24-34 years old • Transition to cohabitation occurred rapidly (within 6 months) with plans for a future not having been discussed Do you suppose the high percentage of new marriages involving cohabitating couples are reflected in divorce rates?

28. NonMarrieds: Cohabitation • Before 1960, and Three’s Company, cohabitation was rarely ever heard of. • About 8% of all households are occupied by couples who are cohabitating As Sociologists, it is our job to understand why the number of people cohabitating has increased so much over the last few decades. Why do you think this is?

29. Non Marrieds: Cohabitation

30. NonMarrieds: Cohabitation • In Europe, cohabitation is a much more popular and socially acceptable living arrangement

31. NonMarrieds: Cohabitation • What makes the U.S. different? • Strong emphasis on individualism. In particular, expressive individualism which emphasizes personal satisfaction, self expression and personal growth • As a result, more short-term, fragile cohabitating relationships exist • This means Americans partner up frequently, for shorter amounts of time and then repeat the process

32. NonMarrieds: Cohabitation Activity • Instructions: Break into small groups. Discuss what you know about cohabitation. Use your sociological imagination. Brainstorm a hypothesis for why cohabitation is increasing. They don’t have to be the examples below, think outside the box. Designate one person to share the hypothesis with the class. • Why Cohabit? • Can not be examined separately from the social context • Reasons • Finances • Consider the economy • Convenience • Childcare? • Increased switch to urban areas • Housing needs Do you suppose that the reasons for cohabitation effect the outcomes of cohabitation?

33. NonMarrieds: Cohabitation • Negative effects of cohabitation on marriage • No evidence that cohabitation weeks out incompatible couples and prepares people for successful marriages • The divorce rate among those who cohabited before getting married is higher than those who have not • Not believes in marriage to begin with? • More committed to autonomy than marriage? • Focus on individual need fulfillment • For marriage specifically: • If cohabitation was a precursor to marriage for both participants (they cohabit after they have made plans to marry which is approximately 46%) this arrangement is seen as prenuptial and does not seem to effect the marriage outcome • A crucial component for success in any relationship (cohabitating or marriage)is communication of intention from both partners*

34. NonMarrieds: Advantages • Opportunities for self-development and personal growth • Opportunities to meet different people and have a variety of friendships* • Economic independence • Varied sexual experience • Freedom to control own life* • Opportunities for career change*

35. NonMarrieds: Disadvantages • Loneliness • Economic hardship* • Feeling out of place in social gatherings • Sexual frustration • Lack of children or lack of family in which to bring up children • Lack of family or close social ties*

36. Families: General Definitions • US Census Bureau: Defines family as two or more individuals related by blood, marriage or adoption living in the same household • Sociologists: Define family as a social group whose members are bound by legal, biological or emotional ties or a combination of all three What are your thoughts on these definitions?

37. Families: What is a Family? • Nuclear family • A familial form consisting of a father, mother and biological children • Parsons, a structural-functional theorist, discussed gender roles within this type of family How common is this family type now? Why?

38. Families: What is a Family? • Extended Family • A large group of relatives, usually including at least three generations living either in one household or in close proximity • Used to be very common and is becoming more common again Why is this family becoming more common?

39. Families: What is a Family? • Kin • Relatives or relations, usually those related by common descent How might this type of family life relate to arranged marriages?

40. Applying theories • Social Exchange Theory • Individuals weight the cost benefits of mate selection and remaining in a marriage • Conflict Theory • Authority comes from institutionalized, legitimate power • Institutionalized means embedding concepts, social roles, values and norms within a social system or society • Functionalist Theory • Society in a state of balance • Specific parts have specific functions • Family Systems Theory • Family is understood by conceptualizing it as a complex, dynamic, changing collection of parts, subsystems and family members • Life Course Theory • Marriage is an ongoing career that occurs within the context of other life course events. Relates to broader social context. How do these theories apply to this lecture on marrieds, nonmarrieds and families?

41. Food for Thought