Presentation Transcript

1. I love you!
2. smack smack
3. NORMALLY I know 1000 persuasion techniques… Whendidyou last use one? Cool! Wellitwas… … ?? VINHLY Thanks to www.vinh.ly, I learneffortlesslywith comics and I applyeverything! I know 1000 persuasion techniques… Whendidyou last use one? Cool! I do all the time! I’msold! www.vinh.ly
4. NORMALLY CO CO CO Great paper on the permafrost! You shouldpresentat the Helsinki conference! Well… I have anotherpaper to write, I’llbetoobusy… 2 2 2 Thanks! come on… gulp VINHLY CO CO CO Great paper on the permafrost! I bookedyou a slot to presentat the Helsinki conference! Yournameisalready on the invites! Is that ok for you? 2 2 2 Well… Ok, but it’s a bit intimidating Thanks! Gulp You’llmakeit… www.vinh.ly
5. NORMALLY 2 weekslater… I’lldefinitelythink about it… So, you’llfeedmyfish Romeo whileI’mawaynextweek, right? Thanks! ROMEOOOOOO!!! VINHLY 2 weekslater… I guessyouowe me one for next time… So, weagreedyou’llfeedmyfish Romeo whileI’mawaynextweek. Let’sshake on it! Ahhh, I keptthinking about you last week, Romeo… www.vinh.ly
6. NORMALLY Do youwant to come for ourwinetastingevent? It’sinteresting, but I’mquitebusy right now… Come on, everybodycanmake time for a bit of wine! Goodbye. VINHLY Do youwant to come for ourwinetastingevent? Come on, it’s not likewe’ll force you to stayagainstyourwill… It’sinteresting, but I’mquitebusy right now… Haha… www.vinh.ly
7. NORMALLY I can’tlower the price, I amworkingwith a verythinmargin! I’m a long-time customer, I’m sure youcan do something for me! I thinkwe’re close to an agreement. With a 5% price discount, I woulddefinitelysign. Well… VINHLY I can’tlower the price, we have a very strict corporatepolicy. But wecanextend the warranty for you. If that’s the best youcan do, thenI’lltakeit! I thinkwe’re close to an agreement. With a 5% price discount, I woulddefinitelysign. Great! www.vinh.ly
8. NORMALLY It’’squiteexpensive… How much for this banana? It’s a verygood product. For $10, it’s a literally a steal. I’llmake an effort, how about $9? VINHLY Then, let’sagree on $5… Wouldyouaccept $4 for this banana? I wouldneedat least $6, and I wouldmake a verylow profit. $5,50 and it’s a deal… Deal! www.vinh.ly
9. NORMALLY Wait! I thoughtitwas real fur… I don’twant a cheap knock-off! It’s a fantastichat! And no animal waskilled for it! I’lltakeit! Great! Follow me! VINHLY So do you come hereoften? No, but I should…I’mvery happy I foundthishat. I’lltakeit! Great! Follow me! Cool… www.vinh.ly
10. If it’s not Ly Vinh, thenI’mleavin’ But meeting Ly Vinh, that’swhatI’mlovin’ www.vinh.ly
11. NORMALLY Do we have a deal? So, the whole package willbearound $4500. I had a lowerprice in mind. Yourcompetitoronlyasks for $4300. VINHLY I’llsendyou the invoice. For information, with the custom VAT, warranty and shipping fee, the final amountwillbearound $4500 Yes! It’s the best offerI’veseen on the market! Just becauseit’syou, it’llbe $4000, do we have a deal? Great! Hrmm…ok www.vinh.ly
12. VINHLY NORMALLY Mc Gregor? Whywouldyouwant to vote for somebodywhodoes not keephis promises? Don’t vote for McGregor! He does not keephis promises… www.vinh.ly
13. VINHLY NORMALLY I must admit not many people boughtourproductuntilnow! It’s a very exclusive product. Onlysome happy few managed to gettheir hands on it. www.vinh.ly
14. My boss isgoing to kill me, but I’llgiveyou a special 10% discount Thanks www.vinh.ly
15. $$
16. NORMALLY I need to catch a flight tomorrow… Well, mywifeneeds the car tomorrow… so I don’tthink I can help. So, I wouldneed a lift to the airporttomorrowat 5am. Couldyou help me? hrmm Uh-oh! VINHLY I noticedyouwere out of staples, so I broughtyou a spare box… OK, I need to check withmywife, but I’llpickyou up tomorrow! By the way, I wouldneed a lift to the airporttomorrowat 5am. Couldyou help me? Thanks! hrmm Coool! www.vinh.ly
17. NORMALLY If I understandcorrectly, you have issues withpricing and shipping… For the pricing, wecanmakeyearlyinstallments for 3 years. Is that OK? For the shipping, wecanworkwith the supplier youwant… and… Wait! I’mstillthinking about the price! Ok… Yes! VINHLY I wrote down your issues withpricing and shipping… Nowthatwe’vedefinitivelydealtwithpricing, let’s talk about shipping… For the pricing, wecanmakeyearlyinstallments for 3 years. Can I cross pricing off? Yes! Right! Ok… www.vinh.ly
18. INERTIA SKEPTICISM REACTANCE I don’tlikethis! You are waytoopushywithyourproposal… I’m happy to staywith the supplier I have right now… I don’tthinkyour arguments fullyreflect the reality of my business www.vinh.ly
19. I’m back from Sydney, Paris and New York… It must be cool to travelthismuch for work… Trust me, all thosecities look the same: a runway, someairplanes and an hotelnearby.
20. Thosevoice-activatedgoogle glasses are way cool! ‘’sex change operation’’ Biip…2298 picturesfound AAHHAHHH ? Haha!
21. I’venoticedthatHungerGamesreminded me of web entrepreneurship! A bunch of teensfightagainsteachother to entertainoldrich people Then the survivorgets money sothatotherteenskeepcoming. That’s the perfect plan!
22. People sayit’s hard to keepyour tan whileworking in consulting. A bunch of teensfightagainsteachother to entertainoldrich people Then the survivorgets money sothatotherteenskeepcoming
23. NORMALLY Thankyou for your proposition, but we’vealready made itthis far withoutyou Here’s the deal, wereallywant to help you … And that’swhyyoushouldconsider us to beyour top tiersuppliers hmmm! VINHLY I thinkweshould team up and makesure wegetrid of them! I heard Goodwill istrying to stealyourcustomers… And I personallycan’tworkwiththembecausethey are locked in withothersuppliers … Good idea! hmmm! www.vinh.ly
24. NORMALLY Hello… Hello… VINHLY www.vinh.ly
25. NORMALLY Thankyou for your proposition, but we’vealready made itthis far withoutyou Here’s the deal, wereallywant to help you … And that’swhyyoushouldconsider us to beyour top tiersuppliers hmmm! VINHLY I thinkweshould team up and makesure wegetrid of them! I heard Goodwill istrying to stealyourcustomers… And I personallycan’tworkwiththembecausethey are locked in withothersuppliers … Good idea! hmmm! www.vinh.ly
26. NORMALLY So whatwouldyoursalaryrequirementbe? Whywouldyouthinkthat? I don’tthinkso. $90,000 wouldbe more realistic… It’smyfairmarketworth. $95,000 Come on… VINHLY $94,600? So whatwouldyoursalaryrequirementbe? It’s the averagesalary for people withmyexperience. Hrmmm…How about $94,000? $94,600 Hey… hey… www.vinh.ly
27. VINHLY NORMALLY Have youthought about purchasing a complementary retirement plan? I’mjusthere to help youdefineyour retirement strategy… I neverreallythought about it! Not interested. www.vinh.ly
28. NORMALLY Unfortunatelythose are the onlycolorsavailable. Which one of those do youprefer? I’m not sure about thosecolors. Do you have green? None. VINHLY The issue is not the color of the teddy, the issue iswhich one has the best texture. Tryit. I’m not sure about thosecolours. Do you have green? That’sreally soft! Right! www.vinh.ly
29. VINHLY NORMALLY Have youthought about purchasing a complementary retirement plan? I’mjusthere to help youdefineyour retirement strategy… I neverreallythought about it! Not interested. www.vinh.ly
30. Sighhh… Job Board NO. NO JOBS Are you feeling a bit down young man? Even I canseethat… What’syour story? Pfffff… ??? www.vinh.ly
31. It’s hard to find a banking job whenyou’ve been outside the job market for a few years. I was a successfulbankeruntilmywifeleft me. I had a completemeltdown. I had to take a break. Tell me more… Nina saidshewanted to staythereforever… I need to find a banking job to makeenough money to buy the farmas the ownerisretiringsoon. Then, I spenttwoyears as a farmemployee. Mydaughter, Nina, wasso happy to live in countryside… playingwithsquirrels. www.vinh.ly
32. So that’syourdream… Looks like a great story! You should tell it to yournext interview! I wasraised in a farm and I thinkyourdaughterwillbeverylucky. I’lltry… www.vinh.ly
33. NORMALLY Sorry, corporatepolicydoes not allowreturns I haven’ttouchedthis @#$#. You shouldgive me my money back! Sorry, corporatepolicydoes not allowreturns grrrrrr What? Customer support Customer support Customer support VINHLY I understandthere’s a policy, but I’m sure the king of customer support can do something… …I guess I cangiveyou a credit note for the nextpurchase… Sorry, corporatepolicydoes not allowreturns Ohh? Yipeeee! Customer support Customer support Customer support www.vinh.ly
34. NORMALLY You’re a good candidate for the job, but it’sworrying for me thatyoudon’t know accounting basics… I did not thinkitwas relevant for me to mention thatsinceit’s a HR position… Well, maybeyoushould have taken more time to understand to understandwhat the position was… What? uhhh VINHLY Yesterday I added the numbers in the phone book for fun… The final numberismysalary expectation! You’re a good candidate for the job, but it’sworrying for me thatyoudon’t know accounting basics… I did not wantyouraccountants to think I wasgunning for their jobs… but I know mywayaround a balance sheet… Ha ha Ha ha! www.vinh.ly
35. If I candemonstratethatwe have the best product in the market, wouldyoube able to purchase right now?… I thinkso… www.vinh.ly
36. Greetings, I have come to help vinhlysconquer the world. Surrendernow! Welcome! www.vinh.ly
37. DENIAL BARGAINING That’s not possible! I justsaw a guywalking out this shop with a bag full of french fries! Come on! I’m sure you have one or twoleft. Let’sjustsay, I takewhat’sleft and I leave, ok? Sorry, thereare no french friesany more… What? v ANGER DEPRESSION ACCEPTANCE OK… can I have a hamburger then? You better hand me your french fries or I’ll kick yourass to the moon! I’llnever taste the sweetflavor of french friesagain… booohoooo… v www.vinh.ly
38. This is a great article. I guaranteeit… or your money back! www.vinh.ly
39. We have 179 customerswho have boughtthisproduct. Wecan call any of them right now, and I know for a factthatthey’ll all saythey’resatisfied! hmmm Customers www.vinh.ly
40. NORMALLY Come on! You couldat least pretend to care! Wouldyou have some change for the Red Cross, sir? Cling! Cling! VINHLY Wouldyou have some change for the Red Cross, sir? Of course, it’s all about giving back! Cling! Cling! You are a truehero $$ www.vinh.ly
41. NORMALLY Calm down, I’ve been doingthis for years… Dr Weinsteinisready for you, youcan come in now… Haaa! VINHLY Go easy on me doc… Dr Weinstein, ourmostexperienceddoctor, isready for younow…. Don’tworry… You won’tfeel a thing… www.vinh.ly
42. You looking for a taxi? I’mvery cheap taxi. 300 rupees to city center… Nobodybetterprice. DELHI AIRPORT What? Huh? I need to check…. 2 am Delhi We have standard non negotiable rates. It’s 400 rupees. Taxi counter
43. 2 am Delhi You looking for a taxi? I’mvery cheap taxi. 300 rupees to city center… Nobodybetterprice. DELHI AIRPORT What? Huh? I need to check…. We have standard non negotiable rates. It’s 400 rupees. I toldyou, godismywitness, I never lie…. Taxi counter 2:30 am In the taxi
44. Oh, the road isblockedbecause of the Sheeva festival… I can’tseem to enter the area of yourhotel… 3:30 am Attourist information Let’sjustgetsome help from the tourist information… i Incredible !ndia Whatam I doinghere? I justwant to sleep….
45. There are no roomsleft, because of the Sheeva festival. We’llrefundyouyourdeposit. -Click. You’re French? So ismywife! Bonjour… So let’s call yourhotel Incredible !ndia Incredible !ndia That’s not a verycomfortable situation. But don’tworryyou’re not the onlytouristcomingherewiththat issue. This ID card shows that I ampaid by the government to help you and all the othertourists. Incredible !ndia Incredible !ndia ID
46. We have triedmany places now. Maybeyoushouldthink about visitingoutside Delhi for a few days? You’re free to refuse. 4:30 am Weonly have roomsavailablefrom $100 per night. NO! click Wejustpackagedthistraveloutside Delhi for thisamericanguy, there’shispassport copy inside, sopretendyou have not seenit It’s $650, I know itseems a lot, but it’sbetterthanwastingyour money on expensiveaccomodation in Delhi… What!!!
47. 1 hourlater 5:30 am It’s a hard bargain, but let’sagree on $420… Ok. Don’tworry about a thing. We’lltake care of everything. Can I have yourcreditcard? I’lljustbe right back… VISA
48. Meanwhile Hi Hotel Star Plaza? I justcalledyou, but I’m not sure itwasyou. Is ittruethat the roads to yourhotel are blocked? It’s a SCAM!! Get out now! Give me the personyou’retalkingwith… I wantmy money back… I justhad the hotel manager and you’re not a real government official. Let me talk to my manager. Huh?
49. No problem. Show me the cancellationreceipts, give me a cigarette a cup of coffee and drop me off atmyhotel… 10 minutes later Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Weapologize! Weconcelled the payment 7 am Delhi Hotel Star Plaza I’ll call mybanktomorrow to make sure everythingiscancelled. I have all your contacts if there are anyshannanigans… zzzzzzzzzzz
50. Can you, sir, give me 3 reasonswhyweshould not proceed as I proposed? huh? scratch www.vinh.ly
51. scratch scratch
52. GOOD STUFF Turn page Examples I don’t know how wecanlisten to eachother, wedon’t have ears. Example What? www.vinh.ly
53. NORMALLY I have no hands. You tell me you’re an awesomesalesman… sell me thispen! This penis a miracle of technology… think about all the contractsyouwillsignwith style! This has yourname on it… do youwantitnow or should I wrapit? VINHLY You tell me you’re an awesomesalesman… sell me thispen! Do youwritesometimes? Writingwith a penisreally good for creativity… Not really, but mywifedoes… sheis a writer… I neverthought about that… www.vinh.ly
54. NORMALLY Hi, can I askyou for a medium cup of coffee? Hereyou go sir… Thanks! VINHLY Hi, I wouldlike to askyou for the world… please. Hereyou go sir… someice? Yesplease. www.vinh.ly
55. NORMALLY I wouldreallyneedmuch more information to decide…! If youreallylikethisproduct, youshouldreallybuyitnow! VINHLY I thinkyoulikethisproduct, but youdon’t have to decide right now… Takeyour time. If you change yourmind in the week to come tell me! OtherwiseI’llsendyou the invoice. Ok? True. OK. www.vinh.ly
56. BIG THINK… THINK… www.vinh.ly
57. NORMALLY So what do you do…hrmmm…what’syournameagain? Hey, I’m Bob, what’syourname? Good to seeyouaroundthis networking event… John. John. Yup. VINHLY Well, it’s a pleasure meeting you, John. Hey, I’m Bob, what’syourname? John… It’s John right? John. Me too, Bob.. Yup. www.vinh.ly
58. NORMALLY Aftermonths of discussion, I’mgladwefinally came to an agreement.. I’msorry I did not talk about thatbefore, but I wantexclusivity for Europe. That’s non negotiable. If it’s not negotiable, I’ll have to agree. Good! Right! VINHLY After all we’vediscussedyou’redroppingthisbomb and refusing to negotiate. Sorry, I might as wellleave… Aftermonths of discussion, I’mgladwefinally came to an agreement.. I’msorry I did not talk about thatbefore, but I wantexclusivity for Europe. That’s non negotiable. Right! www.vinh.ly
59. DIRECT MARKETING I amamazing in bed! ADVERTISING Sheisamazing in bed! www.vinh.ly
60. TELEMARKETING I amamazing in bed! What?? CRM (CUSTOMER RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT) Do youremember me fromcollege? I wasamazing in bed right? True! www.vinh.ly
61. PUBLIC RELATIONS Hey you look great! You must beworking out a lot… want a drink? By the way, didyou know I wasamazing in bed? Hrmmm…yes! MERCHANDISING I amamazing in bed! SMAAAACK I canbelievethat!! www.vinh.ly
62. BRANDING I heard about you, you’reamazing in bed, right? Yes! DECEPTIVE MARKETING Don’tworry, youwon’t have to invite me for brunch tomorrow… www.vinh.ly
63. REALITY CHECK Is thereanybodywhowants to talk to me? www.vinh.ly
64. NORMALLY I’m not really sure I should switch for you, guys. Let me call mycurrent supplier… Well, they’re not answering… Good thingI’mhere!Let’s talk!! Go ahead! Driiiiiiing Driiiiiiing Driiiiiiing Driiiiiiing Bob Supply & Co www.vinh.ly
65. VINHLY I’m not really sure I should switch for you, guys. Let me call mycurrent supplier… Don’t trust them: they’re on the verge on bankrupcy, they’ll promise anything… Go ahead! Hello? Waaazuup! My man… How can I help you? Bob Supply & Co www.vinh.ly
66. PARVENUS PATRICIANS Look athis! McMillans! They’re $10,000, and youcan tell by the red frames… Those are McMillanssunglasses. I love the craftmanship… Mc POSEURS PROLETARIANS Hey, I swear! Those are real McMillans Why the hellwould I wear sunglasses indoor? ? ? ? China www.vinh.ly
67. NORMALLY I don’tthink I need to purchase a computer. It’suseless for me… You’rekidding right? Didyouget the memo? We’ve been in the 21st century for quite a while… Really? ThenI’ve been doingprettywellwithout computers… hrm VINHLY Imagine, tenyearsfromnow, whenyourealize all the thingsyou have missedbecauseyoucould not use a computer…… How wouldyoufeelthen? I don’tthink I need to purchase a computer. It’suseless for me… …Regretful… www.vinh.ly
68. NORMALLY Sorry. I’m not intoget-rich-quick schemes. Bye. Whodoesn’t? You willbathe and shower in free money everymorning. Are youready? Ri$k free money! RPG FUNDS Ri$k free Money! RPG FUNDS Ri$k free Money! RPG FUNDS Do youlike free money? Waiiit… VINHLY Whodoesn’t? Wow. Impressive. Mylatestcustomerbought a new yacht and justhanded me $100,000 extra to manage If you’reinterested, I canwalkyouthrough how me made thathappen. OK? Ri$k free money! RPG FUNDS Ri$k free Money! RPG FUNDS Ri$k free Money! RPG FUNDS Do youlike free money? OK… www.vinh.ly