Habit #4

1. Habit #4 Think Win-Win “Pursue Victory with Honor”

2. Ice-Breaker • Stand next to a partner. • One of you needs to make a fist; as tight a fist as you possibly can. • On the count of three I want the other partner to try and open the other person’s hand.

3. Follow-Up • Did any of you simply ask the other person to open their fist? • “When the environment feels competitive we automatically play with a Win-Lose mindset.” What does this mean?

4. Habit #4 - Think Win-Win • Think Win-Win is a habit that will help your relationships • You will be able to deal with issues, problems, arguments, etc more effectively and most importantly…keep both yourself and the people around you happy!

5. “Win – Lose” – The Totem Pole This Mindset: I benefit/get what I want while others do not. People with this attitude usually: • Use other people, emotionally or physically, for their own selfish purposes • Try to get ahead at the expense of others • Spread rumors about others • Concentrate on getting their own way without thinking about others’ feelings • Become jealous and envious when something good happens to someone else

6. “Lose – Win” – The Doormat This Mindset: I don’t benefit/get what I want, while others do. People with this attitude usually: • Set low expectations for themselves • Have low self-esteem and never consider themselves worthy or good enough • Compromise their standards over and over again • Give in to peer pressure • Allow themselves to be walked on with the excuse of being the “peacemaker” • Is there a time when a Lose-Win attitude is fine?

7. “Lose – Lose” – The Downward Spiral This Mindset: I don’t benefit and neither does anyone else. People with this attitude usually: • Seek revenge • Desire to win at all costs • Are obsessed with others in a negative manner • Have codependent and emotionally damaging relationships

8. “Win – Win” – The All You Can Eat Buffet This Mindset: I am satisfied/happy and so are others. People with this attitude usually: • Are happy when others succeed • Help others succeed • Think “Abundance” • Are willing to share recognition with others • See life as an All-you-can-eat buffet for everybody • Listen as a I read a story that demonstrates Win-Win (6 Most Important Decisions, top of page 26). • Watch the video to see another example of Win-Win in action: Sportsmanship

9. When do we need to “Think Win-Win?” • When we are playing sports, games, etc. • When we need to work as a group • When we need to address problems in our relationships • Really - we need win-win for most of our human interactions.

10. Keys to a Win-Win Mindset • Develop a healthy definition of the word COMPETITION; develop a balance between wanting to win and doing it in a healthy, positive way. • Realize that COMPARISONS to other people are not healthy and a waste of your time.

11. Group Activity • Get with your assigned group of four • This is the BEST activity for demonstrating the importance of working with others for a common “win.” • You need others in your group to succeed in order to succeed yourself. • The only way that your team can be successful is if you all participate.

12. Directions Each group has: - 4 pencils, 4 pieces of string, a penny and a “course.” • The goal is for your group is use the resources given to guide the penny through the course (start to finish) without touching the sides of the course. • This is NOT a competition with any other group in the room

13. Rules • The penny must stay within the lines of the course at all times. • The penny can only be touched by the pencil’s eraser. • Each person can only touch one of the strings • No one can EVER touch the pencil while the penny is en route • The paper may not be moved or tilted at any point while the penny is en route.