Strategies for Creating Success in College and in Life

On Course Strategies for Creating Success in College and in Life Chapter 8 Developing Emotional Intelligence

CHOICES OF SUCCESSFUL STUDENTSDEVELOPING EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

DEVELOPING EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE FOCUS QUESTIONS What is emotional intelligence? How can you experience the full range of natural human emotions and still stay on course to a rich, fulfilling life?

EMOTIONAL SELF-AWARENESS Knowing your feelings in the moment. EMOTIONAL SELF-MANAGEMENT Managing strong feelings. SOCIAL AWARENESS Empathizing accurately with other people’s emotions. RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT Handling emotions in relationships with skill and harmony. FOUR COMPONENTS OF EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Create a memory device that helps you remember and understand these four components of EI.

Read each description; then decide which component of emotional intelligence is being demonstrated. APPLYING THE CONCEPT EMOTIONAL SELF-AWARENESS Candace notices that her breathing is accelerated, her chest feels tight and her jaw muscles are clenched and realizes her anger is escalating. Alex is furious after discovering that his roommate has eaten all of the snacks that Alex bought. Alex decides to take a long walk and think before confronting him about the situation. EMOTIONAL SELF-MANAGEMENT

APPLYING THE CONCEPT Halalo’s friends come from very different backgrounds: one from New York city, two from St. Louis, one from a family farm in southern Missouri and one from a small town in eastern Oregon. Still, he can tell when each of them is upset about something. SOCIAL AWARENESS Mikel knows that Annette flunked the same test on which Kerri scored a “95.” Instead of telling Annette she should have spent more time studying, he lets her vent her feelings about the test and the class. Later, he asks Annette if she would like to join his study team. RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT

Write a list of as many emotions as you can think of. In your groups, read your lists to each other. As you hear emotions that are not on your list, add them. One at a time, each person share the emotion that gives him/her the greatest challenge in managing. Group members, offer suggestions for how the person can better manage that emotion.

ONE STUDENT'S STORY:Lindsey Beck Identify which component(s) of emotional intelligence got Lindsey off course. What new choice helped her get on course? What lesson from Lindsey’s story could you apply to your own life?

REDUCING STRESS FOCUS QUESTION How can you soothe stressful feelings that make life unpleasant and threaten to get you off course?

STRESS: SYMPTOMS As you read the symptoms appearing below, jot down each one that you are currently experiencing. high blood pressure muscle tension headachesbackaches indigestion irritability ulcerscold sores chronic constipation or diarrhea muscle spasms ticstremors sexual dysfunction fatigue insomniaemotional upsets Are there other symptoms in your life that may be caused by stress? On a scale of 1-10 (10 = high stress), what do you think is your present level of stress?

SYMPTOMS OF STRESS From the following list, identify which emotion is most likely to get you off course: OVERWHELM ANGER AND RESENTMENT FEAR AND ANXIETY SADNESS AND DEPRESSION JOY AND HAPPINESS

TRUTH IN CARTOONS With a partner, examine “The Far Side” cartoon by Gary Larson in the section titled “Healthy Stress Reduction.” Discuss: What is funny about this cartoon? What truth is expressed in this cartoon? How could you apply this truth to improve your own life?

ONE STUDENT'S STORY:Jaime Sanmiguel Jaime shares a common fear with many people: the fear of speaking in public. What helped Jaime choose to move past his fear and take a positive action? What fear of yours might interfere with achieving your desired outcomes and experiences? What lessons can you apply from Jaime's story to help you?

CREATING FLOW FOCUS QUESTIONS What are you doing when you feel most happy to be alive—when you become so absorbed that time seems to disappear? How can you create more of these peak experiences in college and beyond?

QUOTATIONS Choose your favorite quotation from the margins of the "Creating Flow" section. In your group, share the quotation you selected, what it means to you, and your reasons for choosing it.

Skill +Challenge= Boredom Skill +Challenge= Anxiety Skill +Challenge= Flow BECOMING AN ACTIVE LEARNER This is an example of conveying meaning in a visual way. Translate the meaning into words.

BELIEVING IN YOURSELF:DEVELOP SELF-LOVE Self-Care Plan Nurture Yourself Physically Nurture Yourself Mentally Nurture Yourself Emotionally Which of these is the area in which you need to work on most ?

EMBRACING CHANGE: DO ONE THING DIFFERENT THIS WEEK Look at the list of nine beliefs and behaviors. Which of these choices is most likely to help you move closer to your desired outcomes and experiences? Write about your choice, using one or more of the 4E’s (examples, experiences, explanation, evidence).

WISE CHOICES IN COLLEGE:MANAGING MONEY Pair up and look at the chart in On Course showing level of education, median earnings and unemployment rate. Discuss: What educational degree raises your potential salary the most? What effect does education have on your likelihood of being employed? What other conclusions can you draw from the chart? What effect did examining this chart have on your motivation to continue college?

WISE CHOICES IN COLLEGE:MANAGING MONEY Choose the strategy for “Decreasing the Flow of Money Out“ that has the greatest chance of increasing your abundance.

KEY CHOICES TO DEVELOPING EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE Creating Flow Reducing Stress Understanding Emotional Intelligence

TICKET OUT What do you think will be the most rewarding aspect of developing Emotional Intelligence? Why?

Strategies for Creating Success in College and in Life