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Customer care and its effects on dissatisfied purchasers of exotic birds (The ‘Dead Parrot’ Sketch)

Customer care and its effects on dissatisfied purchasers of exotic birds (The ‘Dead Parrot’ Sketch). Mr Praline. Background. Parrot purchased in this shop (erroneously referred to as ‘Boutique’) One hour previously Avian description – Blue Country of origin - Norway. SWOT analysis.

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Customer care and its effects on dissatisfied purchasers of exotic birds (The ‘Dead Parrot’ Sketch)

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  1. Customer care and its effects on dissatisfied purchasers of exotic birds(The ‘Dead Parrot’ Sketch) Mr Praline

  2. Background • Parrot purchased in this shop • (erroneously referred to as ‘Boutique’) • One hour previously • Avian description – Blue • Country of origin - Norway

  3. SWOT analysis • Strengths • Beautiful plumage • Moves when cage is hit • Weaknesses • No vital signs • Appears to be dead • Fails to respond to offer of cuttlefish

  4. SWOT analysis (contd) • Opportunities • Throw bird into the air • Bang it on the counter • Threats • Bird could be stunned • (Norwegian Blues are known to stun easily) • Could be pining for fjords

  5. New development • Cadaver is observed to have been joined to perch by means of a pointed piece of metal hammered in as a fastener (nail) • Rationale: • Had this precaution not been taken, it could have reached, and then prised apart, the cage bars.

  6. Conclusion • Aforementioned exotic bird is: • Passed on • No more • Expired; gone to meet maker1 • Stiff (and bereft of life) • Rests in peace • Off the twig [sic] • Shuffled off mortal coil • Gone to join choir invisible [idiom] 1 Reference to certain religious conceptions of origination • No replacement available at this time • Customer declined slug due to it not being able to speak

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