The significant transitions and situations of the lifetime of couples and families

1. The significant transitions and situations of the lifetime of couples and families Liina Animägi

2. Outline of a lecture • Life course approach • Pregnancy and birth • Childhood • Youth • Mothering/parenting • Marital breakdown • Old age and death

3. Life course approach • Biological processes: birth, growing and ageing • Social processes: socialization, education, expectations of others, norms and traditions in society • Life course as model of changes in persons life. • Erikson’s model (1963): childhood, work, marriage, retirement, old age. First of it’s kind. Later models include more stages. • Stage of life characterized by crisis. • Transitions between stages as rites of passage.

4. Life course approach • Age as one determinant of stage • Expectations of society on age-groups. • How person himself/herself defines his/her age? • Conflict of generations • Age structure of society

5. Pregnancy and birth • Historically pregnancy and birth are uncertain and risky. In modern societies infant and maternal mortality are low. • Social sciences talk about the control of reproductivity. Health care workers are providers of that societal control. • Control using relationships with health-care workers and technology. • Laws connecting prenatal care with subsidies.

6. Pregnancy and birth • Also, feeling of control as something parents-to-be expect using technologies. • Medicalization of pregnancy and birth makes woman patient, pregnancy illness and downplays social and emotional aspects of pregnancy. • Use of contraceptives as a mean of control. • Expectations regarding pregnancy and birth

7. Childhood • Society and structure of families influences childhood. • What does a child mean for a family? • It can be a resource and also burden. Emotionally and economically. • 10-19 century children were viewed as small adults, invisible. Expected to work soon after infancy. • First signs of concept of childhood can be seen 17th century (Aries,1965). • Welfare of children as a problem also by the end of 19th century. • What do we expect children to be? • Example of research: How parent perceive 6- month old babies (Goldberg & Lewis, 1972). Parents expect girls to be quiet, clean and restrained, boys a noisy and adventurous. • These expectations are self-fulfilling. Parent reward behaviours according to their expectations.

8. Childhood • Christian undrestanding – child is a savage and must be saved by religion. • Rousseau – Childhood as time of innocene. Newborn child as innocent and state of nature. Society corrupts child as it grows. • Childhood is something „natural“, and that can be positive or negative.

9. Childhood • Development of education systems and welfare created distinct conception of childhood. • How we define childhood? • Legal aspects • Parenting literature • Medical aspects • Media and advertising • How children experience childhood?

10. Youth • Youth as a modern invention. • How is youth defined? Who is „youth“? • Youth as a period of trouble and self-discovery • What causes trouble? • Why is self-discovery so important? • Subcultures of youth • Sexuality • Transition from education to work (expansion of education)

11. Paretning/mothering • 19. century, parenting was part of every lifecycle, due to the family structure. • In industrial societies there is “best” age to be parent. • Examples of changing expectations. • What defines the right time to become a parent?

12. Parenting/mothering • What do parents have to do? What does it mean to be a good parent? • Conflict of expectations, different understandings of parenting and mothering. • Expectations of health-care workers • Expectations of relatives and friends • Expectations of spouse and myself. • Different understandings/styles of parenting: • Biomedical • Educational • Spiritual, emotional

13. Parenting/mothering • Examples of parenting ideologies • John Watson (American psychologist, behaviorism) Psychological Care of Infant and Child,1928. • Watson’s psychology was influential on the first half of 20th century. • Children needed strict discipline: rigid sleep patterns, feeding and toilet schedules. Discipline helps to build up a character. • Mothers need to be emotionally detached from their infants. • Benjamin Spock 1950s. • Mothers should feed babies on demand, provide affection and attention. • Mothers should follow their own instincts. More permissive ideology of parenting. • These different understandings of parenting are being influenced by prevalent ideologies in society. • Today’s parenting styles? • Key questions regarding being a good mother?

14. Parenting/mothering • Fatherhood • What does a good father do? • We can see changes in expectations towards fathers. • 1930s-1970s „Absent father“. WWII, breadwinning. • 1980-s role of father at home increased. Equality of opportunity, egalitarian approach to parenting. • Legal approaches to fatherhood: • Parental leave policies around the world. • Fathers after divorce and separation?

15. Marital breakdown • How can marriage or cohabitation end? • Divorce • Separation • Cohabitaton „for the sake of children“ • What are determinants influencing marital breakdown? • Secularization of marriage, marriage as nonreligious, practical commitment. • Legal ease. • Longer life expectancy (divorce instead of a death of a spouse). • Individualism (choice and control over their lives), personal happiness. • Women’s participation of labour force, economic independence.

16. Old age and death • Ageing as biological process. What happens to the body? • Ageing as a social process? • What changes in persons behaviour? • How persons roles change? • How old is „old“? • How society perceives old age? • Ageing populations as a societal problem? • Workforce, welfare.

17. Old age and death • Retirement • Function of retirement • Experience of retirement • Fragmentation of retirement in modern societies. • Changing self of a retired person

18. Old age and death • Death • Perception of death in societies • How societies deal with death? • How individuals deal with death? • Fear of death • Mourning, expressions of mourning.

19. Summary • Life course approach can be valuable way of analyzing and understanding human life in societies. • Significant events of life are influenced by societal expectations.