Table Manners & Etiquette Business Dress

Keith Soster-University Unions Food Service Director Table Manners & EtiquetteBusiness Dress

Proper Introductions • Do the next five things with everyone you meet: • Look them in the eye • Give a firm handshake • Greet them by name • Say your name slowly when introducing yourself • Smile

Proper Introductions • When introducing two people to each other, say the name of the most important person first and then the name of the person being introduced. • Introduce people in the following order: • younger to older: “Coach Plocki, this is my niece Jennifer.” • non-official to official: “Mr. Martin, let me introduce you to my husband Doug Conrad.” • Clarify your relationship with the person: • “Coach Smith, this is my mother Mrs. Sally Conrad.”

Proper Introductions • Keep the forms of the address equal. If you use “Mr. Smith”, you must use “Ms. Taylor”. • Do say something about the person you are introducing so they will have something from which to springboard their own conversation. • Avoid the word “meet” in your introduction.

What’s ETIQUETTE? I can’t even spell it! • Etiquette is defined as the rules for socially acceptable behavior.

"Good manners never go out of style." • It consists mostly of common sense (although it sometimes doesn’t seem so common). • Using etiquette makes life more comfortable for you and makes you more confident in social situations. Examples: • Email • Internet • Gift/Thank you note • Golf course and tennis court attire • Job interviews • Networking • Table manners • RSVPs/ invitations

"Good manners never go out of style." • How are etiquette and table manners important to students at Michigan?

Components of Successful Dining Proper introductions The Table Setting At the Table-Before, During & After the Meal How to Eat…with Manners Top Table Manners

How to Eat…with Manners • Today’s Menu • Bread & Butter • Entrée • Dessert • Plus More! • Difficult foods • Finger foods

The Table Setting Listed manuals should be developed during green stage, and updated/refined at onset of yellow phase.

Two Great Tricks to Remember • “b & d”: Holding your hands in front of you, touch the tips of your thumbs to the tips of your forefingers to make a lower case ‘b’ with your left hand and a lower case ‘d’ with your right hand. This reminds you that ‘bread and butter’ go to the left of the place setting and your ‘drink’ is on the right. • “BMW”: Bread - Meal - Water

At the Table • Your silverware should indicate the courses that will be served. • Silverware: Work from the outside in. • Don’t sit until the host sits first or the host invites you to sit down. • Enter your chair from your left, exit to your right. • Do not touch napkin or silverware until the host does

What do I do if I drop a fork or my napkin on the floor?

Table Talk – DO’S and DON’TS • Relax for a few minutes before the meal with small talk. • A great host will guide the conversation and ask questions to his/her quests that focus on them. • Speak in low, intimate tones at the table. • Pay equal attention to the people sitting on both sides.

Table Talk – DO’S and DON’TS • Avoid offensive topics such as politics, religion, money, sex, etc. • Talk about world news, each other’s interests, sports and/or the well-being of common acquaintances. • If you are unaware of the topic being discussed, be a good listener. • Don’t interrupt.

Before Meal Basics • Remove your hat. • Cell phones off. • Place your napkin on your lap as soon as the host does. • Wait until everyone is served before eating (again - the host will lead). • Never do anything until the host does it first. • What if you don’t have a host?

Meal basics • What if you don’t have a host?

Today’s Menu • Mixed Green Salad • Entrée - Balsamic marinated boneless chicken breast with a fresh relish of artichoke hearts, green & red peppers, tomatoes, basil, cilantro, lemon & lime - Fresh vegetables tossed with fettuccini in béchamel sauce • Apple Pie with ice cream

During the Meal: Soup • The spoon is worked away from the bowl towards the outer rim and then brought forward to the diner. • No slurping! • The soup spoon rests on the plate between bites and when finished. • French Onion Soup: Use the side of the spoon to cut through the cheese; hold the rim if necessary (be careful as the cup may be hot)

The Napkin • When should I wipe my mouth? • What if I need to cough? Blow my nose? Sneeze? • Where do I put the napkin if I need to leave the table briefly? • Where do I put the napkin when the meal is over?

Making the Pass • When passing anything around the table, move items from the left to the right (counter clockwise). Place them on the table rather than in the person’s hand. • If someone asks for something to be passed, only reach for it if you are closest to the item. • You are not allowed to help yourself to this item until the original requester is done serving themselves! • Avoid reaching across someone to retrieve an item.

During the Meal: Bread & Butter • Take one slice (When offered) or one roll and continue to pass to the right. • If you start the pass, do not take until everyone else has. • Place the bread on your bread plate. • Take some butter using your butter knife and put it on your bread plate. • Tear off one bite sized piece of bread, butter it on the plate (not mid-air), and eat it one bite at a time. EXTRA: Tuck any kind of wrappers (cracker or sugar packets) under the bread plate (neatness counts).

Salt & Pepper • FORMAL: Individual salt & pepper are above the bread & butter plate. • INFORMAL: Salt & pepper are placed usually in two locations at the table. • When asked to pass one or the other, always pass both together. • Taste food before adding any seasoning.

During the Meal: Salad • It is appropriate to use a knife if the lettuce is too big. • Items such as olives or other pitted items enter the mouth with a fork and the pit leaves the mouth the same way - by fork. • Beware of cherry or grape tomatoes.

During the Meal: Meat • Meat: Cut and eat one small piece at a time. • Chicken on the bone: Cut meat off the bone with your knife and fork, then cut it into bite-sized pieces. • The tines are held in a downward fashion while cutting.

During the Meal: Vegetables • Peas, corn, pearl onions: Never use bread to corral the food - use knife and fork. • Green beans: Cut with knife into bite-size pieces. • Raw broccoli, carrots, cauliflower: as appetizer, can be eaten with fingers; otherwise, use a fork.

During the Meal: Pasta • Pasta should be eaten by twirling the pasta onto the fork (one may use a spoon if provided, otherwise use the lip of the plate) • Never slurp the pasta hanging from the fork; bite the remaining strands and allow to fall back onto the fork

During the Meal: Dessert • Brownies & Cookies: can be eaten with fingers unless it has sauce drizzled on it. • Pie with Ice Cream: Can use both spoon and fork. • Mini Desserts served on a platter: Pass from left to right; use your fork. • Coffee served with dessert: Don’t turn cup over to indicate you don’t care for coffee • Sugar & Cream

Difficult Foods • Artichokes - eat individual leaves by hand, the heart is eaten with fork and knife • Asparagus - eaten with knife and fork (can be eaten with fingers if firm and not covered with sauce) • Bacon - knife and fork (unless the meal is very casual) • Celery & Radishes - may be eaten with your fingers • BBQ – Usually eaten with fingers and wet wipes or napkins are used to clean the hands

Difficult Foods • Fried Chicken –with fingers only at a picnic; otherwise knife and fork • Corn on the cob - should be served at casual meals; eat with fingers • Lobster - large pieces may need a knife & fork; nutcracker and seafood fork are provided to help with meat • Baked potato - use fork, do not slather, stir and/or mash butter • French Fries - knife & fork unless casual

Finger Foods* • Artichokes • Asparagus (firm) • Bacon-crisp • Small fruit & berries with stems • Caviar • Corn on the cob • Celery & Radishes • French fries • Potato chips • Hamburgers • Hot dogs • Pickles • Pizza • Ribs • Sandwiches • Brownies & Cookies *If you’re not sure whether or not you can eat something with your fingers, just use a utensil.

After the Meal • When you are resting in between bites but not yet finished, the knife and fork should be “open” on the plate (A), cutting edge of the knife facing towards you. • When you are finished eating, the knife and the fork should be laid side-by-side, ”closed” in the middle of the plate at 4 o’clock, fork pointed down (B) B A

Question • Do I have to finish everything on my plate?

Question • Is it O.K. to ask for a doggie bag?

Top Table Manners • Come to the table with clean hands and face. • Turn off your cell phone and remove your hat before sitting. • Put your napkin on your lap after sitting down. • Start eating when everyone else does or when given the OK by the host. • Stay seated and sit up straight. • Keep elbows off the table while eating. • Don’t make negative comments about the food. If you taste something you don’t like, don’t make a fuss. • Don’t play with your food or utensils. • Chew with your mouth closed and don’t talk until you’ve swallowed.

Top Table Manners • Say “please pass the—” rather than reaching. • Don’t hunch over your food. Raise your fork to your mouth to eat rather than lowering your head. • Thank your host or whoever prepared or hosted the meal. • Offer to help clear the table(in the right setting). • Chat softly with everyone at the table. • Don’t make rude noises like burping or slurping. • Excuse yourself to apply lipstick, cough, blow nose, or pick teeth in a private area (i.e., restroom). • Ask to be excused when finished. • Restroom visits don’t need to be announced.

What is the best way to say “thank you” to someone who hosted you in their home?

Conclusion

QUOTES “The test of good manners is to be patient with bad ones.” ―Solomon ben Yehuda ibn Gabirol

Proper Business Dress

Men-Suits • Dark suits are preferred for business • Make sure the suit fits well- classic colors are navy or dark grey • When standing, button your jacket leaving the bottom button undone • Only take your suit jacket off when working in your office • Unbutton your suit jacket when sitting

Shirts • White is always your first choice, blue is also acceptable • Classic is white button down 100% or high blend cotton • Well fitted and not wrinkled • Enough room in the neck to insert one finger • Full cut undershirt (no “wife-beaters”) • The undershirt will make the shirt look whiter

Ties • Complement your suit • Show your personality • No cartoons or flashy ties • Center knotted well at the collar and meets the center of the belt • Tie tacks are appropriate • Top button of the shirt remains buttoned until the tie is taken off

Belts • Black or brown • No wider than one inch • Buckles must be modest • No advertising on the buckle • No worn notches on the belt

Socks • Socks should match the color of the pants • Long enough to cover leg hair • No holes

Pants • Well pressed • Long enough to cover midway down the back of the shoe • Pants should never touch the ground

Shoes • Clean and polished • Clean and polished • Lace up in black, brown or cordovan • Penny loafers are also acceptable • Heel is not worn • No tattered laces

Hair • Neat and clean • Convey well groomed & professional • Neck hair is trimmed • No facial hair unless it is neatly trimmed

Accessories/Jewelry • Keep jewelry to a minimum • One ring • One watch • Tie tack • No ear rings or other visible body piercings • Consider career options before you get that Tattoo- is it visible? Will it portray your professional side?

Don’t • Mistake professional clothing for being well dressed • Shop alone if you are uncertain about your taste in clothing

Table Manners & Etiquette Business Dress