The Value of the Funeral

2. The Value of the Funeral • Healing moments of remembering • A time of ceremony • Sharing of grief

3. The Value of the Funeral We’re among the first couple of generations for whom the presence of the dead at their own funerals has become optional. And I see that as probably not good news for the culture at large. Thomas Lynch, LFD and Author A good funeral gets the dead where they need to go and the living where they need to be. -Thomas Lynch

4. The Value of the Funeral • Vital for the grief journey

5. A Cultural Shift: Religion • The spiritual, but not religious • One in five people in the USA identify themselves as not affiliated with a church or a particular denomination • 70% of Americans say religion is losing its influence on American life • 80% of GenX (1960’s-1980’s) who did not grow up in a church attending family have never been in a church • 33% of adults under 30 are religiously unaffiliated 2012 American Religious Identification Survey

6. The big news about people with no religious identity, the Nones, isn't that they're No. 2 now in the USA, 19.6% and climbing. It's the diversity among these 46 million people. Cathy Lynn Grossman, USA TODAY 3:33 p.m. EDT October 9, 2012 • “In the 1960s, two in three Americans called themselves Protestant. Now the Protestant group -- both evangelical and mainline -- has slid below the statistical waters, down to 48%, from 53% in 2007 • Where did they go? Nowhere, actually. They didn't switch to a new religious brand, they just let go of any faith affiliation or label. • The Pew Forum on Religion & Public Life released an analytic study today titled, Nones on the Rise, now that one in five Americans (19.6%) claim no religious identity. • This group, called "Nones," is now the nation's second-largest category only to Catholics, and outnumbers the top Protestant denomination, the Southern Baptists. The shift is a significant cultural, religious and even political change.”

7. ACulturalShift:TheNones

8. ACulturalShift:TheNones • 40% said they had no childhood religious initiation ceremony such as baptism, christening, bar mitzvah, etc. • 55% said they had no religious marriage ceremony 2008 American Religious Identification Survey

9. ACulturalShift:TheNones • 66% said they do not expect to have a religious service 2008 American Religious Identification Survey

10. Cookie Cutter Minister • Scratch through previous name and enter the new one • Mispronounce the guest of honor’s name • Read the obituary • Recite the Twenty-Third Psalm • Cue Amazing Grace or • How Great Thou Art • Many in attendance don’t even know who “Thou” is • Close with prayer

11. When will this be over?

12. Altar Call Preacher • Save everyone’s soul • Admonish people for not attending church • Preach the attendees into Heaven

13. When I die. . .don’t do THAT!

14. The Value of the Funeral Vital for the grief journey

15. The Nones The message DOES NOT resonate! They do not see value in ritual that does not fit them They become the “cremation-no service” families

16. A Personal Experience • Memory Boards • Memorials • Tribute Videos • Music Selections • Theme Caskets • Printed Materials

18. History of Celebrants • 1973 - Australian Government established Marriage Celebrants Program • Provided an alternative to Registry Office and religious weddings • New Zealand soon followed

19. History of Celebrants • Of the marriages registered in Australia in 2009, approximately 67% were performed by civil celebrants • 60% of funerals

20. History of Celebrants • 1999 – Doug Manning had been investigating ways to help people who had lost a loved one and there was no service or ceremony • Having heard about the Celebrant movement in Australia & New Zealand, while on a speaking tour to both countries Doug interviewed funeral directors and Civil Celebrants to learn more Doug Manning Founder In-Sight Institute • Already highly regarded speaker and writer on the subject of grief, and well known to the funeral service professions, Doug founded the In-Sight Institute as the Celebrant training arm of his company

21. History of Celebrants • 1995 – Glenda Stansbury joined In-Sight Books after a career in teaching • 2003 - became a licensed funeral director & embalmer • 2010 –obtained her Master’s Degree so she could teach in the mortuary program at the University of Central Oklahoma Glenda Stansbury, MALS, CFSP Lead Celebrant Trainer • Doug and Glenda have trained in excess of 2100 In-Sight Institute Certified Celebrants since 1999

22. Celebrants: An Overview A person who seeks to meet the needs of families during their time of loss Celebrants provide customized, personal funeral and memorial services that reflect the personality and lifestyle of the deceased

23. Who needs a Celebrant? • Mumblers • The Wounded and Disenfranchised • The Liturgical Option • The purpose of a Certified Celebrant is not to eliminate ministers from presiding at funerals for their church members. • The purpose of a Celebrant is to provide a meaningful, personalized service of remembrance or life tribute • for those seeking more or an alternative to what is available

24. Who needs a Celebrant? • On a scale of 1-10, how non-religious should a person be before Celebrant services are offered? • The real questions seem to be, “Can a Celebrant say prayers and incorporate religious elements into a service, or should we call a minister to do that?” Aren’t prayers best left to the professionals? The short answer is: No • 90% of the families Celebrants serve want some religious elements . . . Hymns, opening and closing prayer, scripture

25. Who needs a Celebrant? • The most successful firms have made the commitment to offering two choices: the family’s personal minister or a Celebrant. • No more rent a ministers.

26. Offering Celebrants • On GPL As A Different Service • How To Articulate—Don’t Wait For The Perfect Wiccan Atheist • Families Who Don’t Want Anything • Offering Options • Explaining the value of the service and the Value of ceremony

27. IF YOU BUILD IT… THEY WILL COME

28. What Does a Celebrant Provide to Your Families? • Family Meeting 2-3 hours • Coordinate with funeral director • Prepare service 6-8 hours • Create give aways • Conduct service

29. Certified Celebrant Training Training consists of two and one half days of classroom lectures and participation and one full evening of work on your own.

30. Certified Celebrant Training The curriculum covers: • Articulating the Value of the Funeral • Listening Skills • Conducting a Family Meeting • Service Planning • Eulogy Writing • Music and Reading Resources • Master of Ceremonies • Presentation Skills • Closing Ceremonies • Developing the Celebrant Concept in the community

31. Certified Celebrant Training Training available through: • Various locations around the United States and Canada through InSight Books • Check www.insightbooks.com for training schedule • ICCFA University

32. Certified Celebrant Training Who should attend? • This training is specifically designed for anyone interested in understanding the process of the funeral service and in learning how to personalize and design meaningful funerals or tributes • A successful Celebrant is one who enjoys working with people, has writing and public speaking ability as well as listening and consulting skills

33. The Alternative? We’ve never done it that way before~

34. QUESTIONS?