SOCIAL AND PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT IN EARLY ADULTHOOD Seasons of Life Video - Early Adulthood Please watch the video via the link above. The link is in aqua
What makes young adults happy? • Happiest memories = psychological needs rather than material needs satisfied • Unhappiest memories = basic psychological needs left unfulfilled • Culture influences which psychological needs are most important in determining happiness
What makes us tick? Social Clocks of Adulthood - milestones of development - marriage? - children? • Cultural influence • Ravenna Helson’s research found that women become more focused as they age whether family oriented or career oriented, both fared well
Seeking Intimacy: Erikson’s Viewof Young Adulthood INTIMACY-VERSUS-ISOLATION STAGE Intimacy = Close, intimate relationship with others Isolation = Feelings of loneliness and fearful of relationships - felt that people who did not develop traditional relationships would suffer
Important part of adult life need for belonging Maslow Filters Proximity Similarity Personal qualities Friendship 481
Passionate and Companionate Love: Two Faces of Love • PASSIONATE (ROMANTIC LOVE) • Deals more with physiological arousal • COMPANIONATE LOVE • Affection that we feel towards family and loved ones
Sternberg’s Triangular Theory: Three Faces of Love • Robert Sternberg • Intimacy-feelings of closeness • Passion-sex, physical closeness and romance • Decision/Commitment-love and determination that maintain that love 484
Seeking a Spouse: Is Love All That Matters? • U.S. – love as a major factor • Love and mutual attraction • In other cultures, love may be a secondary • Emotional maturity, health, similar education, chastity • China-men look for good health • women look emotional stability and maturity
Attachment Styles and Romantic Relationships • Infant attachment style is reflected in adult romantic relationships (Shaver) • Secure • Happy and confident about relationships • Avoidant • Less invested, higher break-up rates, often feel lonely • Anxious-ambivalent • Overly invested, repeated break-ups with same partner, low self-esteem 489
Developmental Diversity Gay and Lesbian Relationships: Men with Men and Women with Women • Research findings suggest that gay and lesbian relationships are quite similar to relationships between heterosexuals • Most gays and lesbians seek loving, long-term, and meaningful relationships that differ little qualitatively from those desired by heterosexuals
To Marry or Not to Marry: That is the Question More people may be Labeled a POSSLQ – Persons of the opposite Sex living together
Why do people choice cohabitation rather than marriage? • Not ready for lifelong commitment • “Practice” for marriage • Cohabitating does not necessarily mean the marriage will work out • Chances for divorce seem to be higher for those cohabitating prior to marriage • Reject institution of marriage
Why marry? • Preferred alternative during early adulthood • Desirability of spouse roles – economic, sexual, therapeutic and recreational roles • Legitimatization of children • Legal benefits and protections
What makes marriage work? • Successful married partners: • Show affection • Communicate relatively little negativity • Perceive themselves as interdependent • Experience social homogamy, similarity in leisure activity. and role preferences • Hold similar interest • Agree on distribution of roles
Divorce Around the World Increases in divorce rates are significant worldwide.
Nearly half of married couples experience significant degree of conflict. • Realities of daily living sink in, and they become more aware of flaws. • Sources of conflict: • Separating from parents, becoming autonomous. • Some have trouble identifying with spouse, and some want to have separate identity from spouse. • Allocation of time with friends/family of origin.
But the news is not all bad! Most married couples: • View early years of marriage as deeply satisfying • Find themselves more deeply in love than before marriage • Report newlywed period as one of happiest in entire married life
Parenthood: Choosing to Have Children • Statistics • Costs • Reasons 495
Some children are unplanned, but couples cope, because they wanted children eventually; some unplanned children are unwanted. • Today most families have no more than 2 children, rate in US today is 2.1 children per woman (in 1957, it was 3.7 children per woman). • Women are having children later today, into their late 30s and older. • A middle-class family with two children will spend about $233,000 for each child before the child reaches the age of 18. • People have children for psychological reasons. • Pleasure of watching them grow. • Hope children will provide for them in old age or offer companionship. • Most married couples have at least one child.
What produced the decline in the US fertility rate? • Availability of more reliable birth control methods • Increasing numbers of working outside the home • Choosing to have children later • Cost of raising and educating children • Fear of not being good or accessible parent 496
Dual-Earner Couples Working Parent Statistics and Distribution of Chores 496
Close to ¾ of married women with school-aged children work outside home. • More than 50% of mothers of children under age 6 work outside home. • In majority of families, both partners work, but wife generally spend more time taking care of the children. • Husbands primarily perform outside chores, and women do housework, child care, meal preparation. • Although husbands and wives work about same number of hours at their paying, women spend more time doing chores and child care tasks. • Women’s household chores tend to be devoted to things that need immediate attention and wives may experience greater levels of anxiety and stress.
Two’s a Couple, Three’s a Crowd? • Dramatic shift in spouse's roles • Challenges to marital satisfaction • Successful coping
Birth of child brings about dramatic shift in spouse's roles and sometimes decrease in marital satisfaction. • Western culture’s emphasis on individualism views childrearing as primarily private enterprise. Parents in Western society are largely left without significant community support. Consequently, for many couples, strains accompanying the birth of child produce lowest level of marital satisfaction of any point in marriage. • Not all couples experience decrease in marital satisfaction upon birth of child. Factors that permit couples to successfully weather stress of child: • Working to build fondness and affection towards each other. • Remaining aware of events in spouse's life and responding to those events. • Considering challenges controllable and solvable. • Satisfaction closely related to state of marriage before birth of child.
Gay and Lesbian Parents • About 20% of gay men and lesbian women are parents • No difference in psychological adjustment from children raised in heterosexual homes • Specialization of roles develop • For children, no differences in terms of eventual adjustment from those raised in heterosexual households
Singlehood • Statistics • Rationale • Societal view
From Research to Practice Majority of American Women Are Living Without Spouse • What do the numbers say? • What do the numbers mean?
Something to ponder… Why do you think that women are less inclined to remarry after a divorce than men are?
Identity During Young Adulthood: Role of Work Vaillant : Career consolidation • General pattern of psychological development as young adults center on careers • Career concerns supplant focus on intimacy • Criticisms • Highly restricted sample limits Generalizability • Dated findings questions in view of shifts in attitudes toward importance of work
Picking an Occupation • Ginzberg’s Career Choice Theory • Fantasy period • Tentative period • Realistic period • Criticism • Non-representative sample • Overstates choices and options to lower SES people • Age demarcations may be too rigid
Traditionally COMMUNAL PROFESSIONS = women AGENTIC PROFESSIONS = men Women less likely found in male-dominated professions Gender and Career Choices: Women’s Work 502
Why Do People Work? • Motivation • Extrinsic • Intrinsic • Personal identity • Status Job status
Satisfaction on the Job • Satisfaction related to job status • Worker satisfaction also associated with: • Nature of job • Amount of input one has into one’s duties • Influence employees have over others
The Informed Consumer of Development Choosing a Career: Beginning Guidelines • Systematically evaluate a variety of choices. • Know yourself. • Create a “balance sheet,” • “Try out” different careers through paid or unpaid internships. • Remember that if you make a mistake, you can change careers. • It is reasonable to expect that careers may change throughout life.