UNDERSTANDING HUMAN SEXUALITY Episcopal Diocese of Southern Virginia FALL CLERGY CONFERENCE November 15, 2011

1. UNDERSTANDING HUMAN SEXUALITYEpiscopal Diocese of Southern VirginiaFALL CLERGY CONFERENCENovember 15, 2011 Wayne V. Pawlowski ACSW, LICSW, AASECT Certified Sexuality Educator

2. WHAT IS SEXUALITY? Sexual behavior (sex) Biological gender (male/female) � five definitions

3. 5 Ways To Define Gender External Genitalia (outside package) Internal Genitalia (inside package)

6. Intersex Maryland Blue Crab

7. Intersex Butterflies

8. Three Other Ways To Define Gender Chromosomal (XY, XX - 9 possible combinations) Assignment/Reassignment Identity

10. FIVE WAYS TO DEFINE GENDER External Genitalia (outside package) Internal Genitalia (inside package) Chromosomal (XY, XX, others) Assignment/Reassignment Identity

11. WHAT IS SEXUALITY?continued Gender identity Gender expression Gender role Affectional orientation Erotic orientation Romantic orientation

12. Remember: Affectional orientation + Erotic orientation + Romantic orientation = �SEXUAL ORIENTATION�

13. WHAT IS SEXUALITY?continued Intimacy (emotional/physical) Sexual identity/sexual orientation identity Sexual/physical response Reproduction Attitudes, values, feelings and beliefs about the above

14. WHAT IS SEXUALITY?continued Sexual behavior Biological gender Gender identity Gender expression Gender role Affectional orientation Erotic orientation Romantic orientation Intimacy (emotional/physical) Sexual identity/sexual orientation identity Sexual/physical response Reproduction Attitudes, values, feelings and beliefs about the above

15. Attitudes/Values/Feelings/Beliefs RELIGIOUS Individual Family Cultural: larger, dominant, sub Identity Groups: larger, dominant, sub Legal Professional Institutional Scientific Political

17. HUMAN SEXUAL DEVELOPMENT Gender identity Gender expression Gender role Sexual attitudes and values Affectional orientation Erotic orientation Romantic orientation Sexual behavior Sexual identity/Sexual orientation identity

18. Orientation,Behavior,and Identityare three SEPARATE and DISTINCT aspects of sexuality�and they are not always logically connect.

19. Same-Sex Behavior Among Animals

20. Animal Same Sex Behavior(continued)

21. The Last Components Sexual Development Sexual Knowledge Sexual Skills Notice How Little We Talked About Physical Development/Puberty

22. HUMAN SEXUAL DEVELOPMENT Gender identity Gender expression Gender role Sexual attitudes and values Affectional orientation Erotic orientation Romantic orientation Sexual behavior Sexual identity/Sexual orientation identity Sexual knowledge Sexual skills ____________________________________________ Physical development/Puberty

23. SEXUAL IDENTITY/SEXUAL ORIENTATION IDENTITY DEFINITIONSHETEROSEXUAL Erotic and romantic orientations primarily to individuals of the other gender; influenced by affectional orientation

24. SEXUAL IDENTITY/SEXUAL ORIENTATION IDENTITY DEFINITIONSHOMOSEXUAL Erotic and romantic orientations primarily to individuals of the same gender; influenced by affectional orientation

25. SEXUAL IDENTITY/SEXUAL ORIENTATION IDENTITY DEFINITIONSBISEXUAL Erotic and romantic orientations to individuals of both genders; influenced by affectional orientation

26. SEXUAL IDENTITY/SEXUAL ORIENTATION IDENTITY DEFINITIONSASEXUAL Erotic orientation to neither gender; perhaps romantic orientation to either gender; not clear how influenced by affectional orientation

27. SEXUAL IDENTITY/SEXUAL ORIENTATION IDENTITY DEFINITIONS Heterosexual: erotic and romantic orientations primarily to individuals of the other gender; influenced by affectional orientation Homosexual: erotic and romantic orientations primarily to individuals of the same gender; influenced by affectional orientation Bisexual: erotic and romantic orientations to individuals of both genders; influenced by affectional orientation Asexual: erotic orientation to neither gender; perhaps romantic orientation to either gender; not clear how influenced by affectional orientation

28. Having Said All of This About Identities (and Labels)�People, particularly younger people, will identify in ways that fit their perceptions of themselves:

29. Some of The Identity Labels in Use Today Include: Questioning Queer Gender Queer Pansexual Omnisexual Heteroflexible Homoflexible Gayish Polygendered Trannyboy Trisexual Faggot Dyke Flexible sexually/sexuality Romantically changeable/ Romantic changeability Sexual latitude Heterosexual with lesbian/gay tendencies Gay/lesbian with heterosexual tendencies Heterosexual identified bi Lesbian/gay identified bi Undefined/uncategorized Recovering heterosexual prone to relapse

30. And of course�least we forget: Straight

31. And, if we can relax and enjoy ourselves a bit�there are still other identities:

32. GENDER IDENTITY DEFINITIONS Male Female Transgender(ed) + Intersexual + Transsexual + Bigendered

33. ????? Crossdresser Transvestite

35. THE KINSEY SCALE OF HUMAN SEXUAL BEHAVIOR 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 HETEROSEXUAL BISEXUAL HOMOSEXUAL

36. THE KINSEY SCALE OF HUMAN SEXUAL BEHAVIOR 0_________1________2________3________4________5_________6 Heterosexual Bisexual Homosexual Behavior Time Fantasy Gender Identity Scales of affectional, erotic and romantic orientations

37. INFLUENCES/CONCEPTS/ISMS/TERMINOLOGY Heterocentrism Heterosexism Homophobia

38. ________________________________________________________________________________ HOMOPHOBIA HETEROSEXISM HETEROCENTRISM FULLY INCLUSIVE

39. INFLUENCES/CONCEPTS/ISMS/TERMINOLOGY Heterophobia/Homocentrism Biphobia Erotiphobia Sexism Ageism Racism Classism The Closet Coming-out

40. INFLUENCES/CONCEPTS/ISMS/TERMINOLOGY Heterocentrism Heterosexism Homophobia Heterophobia/Homocentrism Biphobia Erotiphobia Sexism Ageism Racism Classism The Closet Coming-out

41. ADOLESCENT DEVELOPMENTAL TASKS Physical Dvp (body maturation) Cognitive Dvp (brain maturation) Psycho-Social Dvp + identity (who am I) + Integrity (values) + Intimacy (erotic and non-erotic) + Independence (physical and psychological)

42. IMPACT OF HOMOPHOBIA AND HETEROSEXISM ON ADOLESCENT DEVELOPMENT Isolation Distancing No positive role models Devalued externally and internally Acceptance based on lies Socialization = Deception Self-monitor vs. spontaneous

43. IMPACT� Boys: Depersonalized sexual encounters Girls: Series of intense emotional attachments

44. FIRST SEXUAL CONTACTS IN ARENAS THAT ARE: Often dangerous and overwhelmingly sexual In a context with no: peer support or feedback adult guidance, support, feedback

45. FREQUENTLY COMPARTMENTALIZE LIFE Separate sexual actions from all other aspects of life and development Separate eroticism from affection and romance

46. RESULTS IN Low self-esteem Poor self-image Guilt Loneliness Confusion Distrust Fear being sick Depression Anxiety Suicidal thoughts

47. FEARS Rejection Condemnation Forced isolation Physical abuse Discrimination Legal problems Constraints on future educational and career options

48. PEOPLE FEAR THESE FROM: Family Peers Schools Religion Child welfare Juvenile justice Mental/physical health care systems

49. All of This Means Growing Up Experiencing: Conditional Acceptance Psychological Homelessness�

50. NEWER INFLUENCES Earlier Coming-Out More Visibility Of/Information About/Influence of GLBT People/Community In All Walks Of Live (politics in particular) Your Episcopal Bishop, Gene Robinson Repeal Of Don�t Ask-Don�t Tell Greater and More Realistic/Non-Sensational Portrayals Of GLBT People On Television And In The Movies Gay Marriage/Civil Unions/Domestic Partnerships/D-P Benefits Increased Number Of Religious Groups Declaring Themselves to Be �Welcoming�/�Inclusive�

51. NEWER INFLUENCES(continued) ENDA, Hate Crime Legislation Increased Services/Advocacy/Resources for GLBTQ Youth (GLSEN, GSAs - gay-straight alliances, �It Gets Better� Campaign, etc.) PFLAG Internet The �It Gets Better� Campaign GLBT-Friendly Political Administration (Visible Political Appointees) And Policies (Hospital Visitation/Decision Making) AIDS/HIV