1 / 18

Ask Attend Act Amend

Time-In: When Time Out Doesn’t Work By Jean Illsley Clarke edited for presentation by Meg Buonforte. Ask Attend Act Amend. Why Not Time - Out?. When time - out is viewed as punishment: Child may use the time to fuel blame, and anger at the parent

presta
Télécharger la présentation

Ask Attend Act Amend

An Image/Link below is provided (as is) to download presentation Download Policy: Content on the Website is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use and may not be sold / licensed / shared on other websites without getting consent from its author. Content is provided to you AS IS for your information and personal use only. Download presentation by click this link. While downloading, if for some reason you are not able to download a presentation, the publisher may have deleted the file from their server. During download, if you can't get a presentation, the file might be deleted by the publisher.

E N D

Presentation Transcript

  1. Time-In: When Time Out Doesn’t WorkBy Jean Illsley Clarke edited for presentation by Meg Buonforte AskAttend ActAmend

  2. Why Not Time - Out? • When time - out is viewed as punishment: • Child may use the time to fuel blame, and anger at the parent • Child may use the time to figure out ways to get even with the parent or someone else

  3. Why Not Time - Out? • When time - out is viewed as punishment: • Child may be encouraged to disconnect • Child may decide that he has to obey parent to avoid punishment and refuse to obey when the threat of time-out is gone

  4. How is Time-In Different?

  5. Time –In • Time-in is not a single discipline tool It has 4 ways to solve the puzzle of discipline: AttendAct AmendAsk

  6. Benefits of the 4 Tools: • Child sees him/herself as responsible and successful • Child understands that rules are for her welfare and the welfare of the family • Child feels that he is a contributing member of the family

  7. Ask • Ask questions a child can answer Keep it simple • Ask questions that don’t end in okay • Ask questions you don’t know the answer to • Ask teaching questions what would happen if…

  8. Act • Your actions should challenge your child to think and respond • Act to reinforcea rule or an expected behavior • Act to get a child’s attention when other methods of discipline have not worked • Act to redirect activity or to interrupt misbehavior

  9. Attend • Attending means you are aware of what is going on in the child’s world • Attend to the hurt child first • Attend to the rules that are constantly broken • Attend to a child’s needs and developmental level

  10. Amend • Amends are not about pain but it is okay if your child experiences discomfort. • Making amends can help your child get past shame • Amends should help the child become a better person • Amends should be related to the problem

  11. Amends • Amends should be satisfactory to the victim • Amends should be reasonable and not produce resentment on parent’s part • Amends should support family values • Amender must put forth effort

  12. What Else Can a Parent Do? • First: refocus on your own values • Think about what you really want for your child • Ask yourself “Is this what my discipline is teaching?”

  13. What Else Can a Parent Do? • Second: check yourself to see if you are giving conflicting messages • Conflicting messages create double binds • Never smile when a child misbehaves

  14. What Else Can a Parent Do? • Third: Remember you are an important influence on your child’s life -Volunteer at your child’s school -Become a cub scout/girl scout leader • Stand up to negative influences -Write a letter to a television station -Write your congressman

  15. What Else Can a Parent Do? • Fourth: ATTEND to yourself as well as your child • Take a deep breath and summon the courage to parent well • Get regular exercise and eat right • Lower the noise level in your home • Turn off the T.V. • Get a babysitter and take time-out

  16. ALWAYS REMEMBER • Parents are responsible for the discipline process. • Children are responsible for the outcome.

  17. Stay connected with your child And remember YOU are your child’s best gift. Celebrate that!

  18. Stay connected to your child and remember- you are your child’s best gift.Celebrate that! For more parenting information contact the Parents as Teachers Program near you or call800-839-7444

More Related