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Habit 3: Put First Things First

Habit 3: Put First Things First. What is stress?. Time management. How important do you think it is to manage your time? What are some examples of time wasters? How do I spend my time? On which activities do I spend too much time? Not enough?. Jar of rocks. Important vs. not important

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Habit 3: Put First Things First

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  1. Habit 3: Put First Things First What is stress?

  2. Time management How important do you think it is to manage your time? What are some examples of time wasters? How do I spend my time? On which activities do I spend too much time? Not enough?

  3. Jar of rocks Important vs. not important Urgent vs. not urgent

  4. The Relationship Bank Account • You have an RBA with everyone you meet. • You need to work on your PBA before your RBA. Why do you think this is? • Where a PBA is the amount of trust and confidence you have in yourself, an RBA is the amount of trust and confidence you have in other people. • Breaking trust & promises: very hard to get back • Acts of kindness: compliments, making someone feel welcome or loved, doing things for others • Be loyal, keep secrets, stick up for people and avoid gossip • Listen • Apologize • Clear expectations

  5. Think Win-Win Win-Lose: winning at the expense of others. You win, but feel rotten after. Lose-Win: people who are easily intimidated and give in. “Doormat” syndrome. Anti-confrontational. Low expectations, compromising standards. Lose-Lose: no one wins. Revenge. Grudges. “If I can’t have it, no one can” Win-Win: everyone can win. You care about others, but you also care about yourself.

  6. Why are people who think win-win so easy to get along with? What type of relationship does lose-win encourage? What are some lose-lose examples from current events?

  7. Competition: is healthy when you’re competing with yourself, or when it challenges you to reach and stretch and become your best. Competition becomes dangerous when you tie your self worth into winning or when you use is as a way to place yourself above another.

  8. Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood Five Poor Listening styles: • Spacing out • Pretend hearing • Selective hearing • Word hearing • Self-centered hearing

  9. Genuine Listening Listen with your eyes, heart and ears.

  10. I didn’t say you had an attitude problem. I didn’t say you had an attitude problem. I didn’t say you had an attitude problem.

  11. Interview activity Full name Do you have any brothers or sisters? How many? How old are they? Do you play any sports or participate in any extra-curricular activities? What are some of your hobbies? What are your plans after graduation?

  12. Then Seek to be Understood • Is as important as the first half of habit 5 but requires something different from us. • Courage • To be able to speak up about how you feel • Seek first to understand is weak without the second part. It is an easy trap to fall into “Doormat syndrome”

  13. Habit 6 - Synergize

  14. What is Synergy? • Synergy is achieved when two or more people work together to create a better solution than either could alone. It’s not your way or my way but a better way, a higher way. • Synergy is: • Celebrating differences • Teamwork • Open-mindedness • Finding new and better ways

  15. Synergy is Everwhere! • Examples of Synergy • Sequoia trees – grow to heights of 300 ft. they grow in clumps so their roots can intermingle to make them strong so winds can not blow them over • A Team – all players playing together • A band – instruments alone have a unique sound (guitar, bass, drums, etc) put together they have a completely different sound.

  16. Celebrating Differences • Synergy doesn’t just happen. It’s a process. • One method to getting there is though celebrating differences • What do you think of when you hear the word diversity? • Racial • Gender

  17. MUCH more to it. Including • Physical features, dress, language, wealth, family, lifestyle, education, wealth, skills, etc • The world is a big pot of mixed cultures, religions, races, and ideas • 3 approaches to handling it.

  18. Shunner’s Profile • They do not enjoy differences, sometimes they are afraid of them. • They are convinced their way is the best. • Will do what it takes to save the world from differences.

  19. Tolerator’s Profile • Believes everyone has the right to be different • They do not shun but they do not embrace either • You don’t bother me, I wont bother you • Never get to synergy because they see differences as hurdles, not as potential strength

  20. Celebrator’s Profile • They have learned that two people that think differently can achieve more than two people alike. • Celebrating differences doesn’t mean you have to agree with them but you value them.

  21. Multiple Intelligences We all learn differently: • Linguistic • Logical/Mathematical • Bodily/Kinesthetic • Spatial • Musical Interpersonal Intrapersonal Naturalist

  22. Grapes • Natural Abilities include: reflective, sensitive, flexible, creative, preference for group work • Can learn best when they: can work and share with others, balance work with play, can communicate, are noncompetitive • May have trouble: giving exact answers, focusing on one thing at a time, organizing • To expand their style, grapes need to: pay more attention to details, not rush into things, be less emotional when making some decisions.

  23. Oranges • Natural Abilities include: experimenting, being independent, curiosity, creating different approaches, creating change • Can learn best when they: Can use trial & error, produce real products, can compete, are self-directed. • May have trouble: meeting time limits, following a lecture, having few options. • To expand their style, oranges need to: delegate responsibility, be more accepting of other’s ideas, learn to prioritize

  24. Bananas • Natural Abilities include: planning, fact-finding, organizing, following directions • Learn best when they: have an orderly environment, have specific outcomes, can trust others to do their part, have predictable situations. • May have trouble: understanding feelings, dealing with opposition, answering “what if” questions • To expand their style, bananas need to: express their own feelings more, get explanations of other’s views, be less rigid.

  25. Melons • Natural abilities include: Debating points of view, finding solutions, analyzing ideas, determining value or importance. • Learn best when they: have access to resources, can work independently, are respected for intellectual ability, follow traditional methods. • May have trouble: working in groups, being criticized, convincing others diplomatically. • To expand their style, melons need to: accept imperfection, consider all alternatives, consider other’s feelings.

  26. Road Blocks to celebrating diversity • Ignorance • You don’t know what other people believe, how they, etc • Often abounds when it comes to understanding people disabilities • Cliques • They become so exclusive that they begin to reject everyone who is not like them • Prejudice • It’s a sad fact that all minorities will have additional hurdles to jump because of many prejudices.

  27. Getting to Synergy Action Plan • Define the problem or opportunity • Their Way: understand the other person’s point of view • My Way: seek to have my ideas understood, share • Brainstorm: get creative, avoid criticism, build on best ideas • The Highway: the best solution

  28. Teamwork There are generally five types of people within a team. • Plodders: stick with the job until it’s done • Followers: very supportive of leaders, if they hear a good idea they can run with it. • Innovators: the creative, idea people. • Harmonizers: provide unity and support, encourage cooperative, great synergizers • Show-Offs: fun to work with, can be tough at times.

  29. Third Alternative • Find a better solution than win-lose, lose-win, or lose-lose • A solution that neither side had in mind at the start. • A way for all parties to win. • Different and often difficult to achieve, but the results are “win” for everyone.

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