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Discover the pivotal ingredients for engagement and trust in your organization. This guide highlights five essential skills and talents needed to cultivate strong connections within your team and with clients. Learn how high self-monitors can adaptively build networks, the importance of vulnerability in communication, and the role of proximity in forming relationships. By employing these strategies, increase visibility, improve sales retention, and create a safe environment for sharing. Engage deeply and thrive in any workplace setting.
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Clicking = Connecting = Engaging = Trusting
Coach SALES RETENTION Superior Engagement Hire Five Skills Five Talents
Five Talents • High Self Monitors • Fluid personality • Modulate emotional expression • Quickly incorporate norms • Manage others’ perceptions • Act as network hubs Five Talents
High Self Monitors fit in anywhere! • Connect easily and thrive on it • Become the centers of networks • Engage deeply • Build visibility ten times faster
Five Skills • Vulnerability • Proximity • Resonance • Similarity • Safe Place Five Skills Five Talents
Vulnerability • Revealing who you are how you feel, what you think, from the get go. • Help the other trust you because you put yourself at risk • Hostage negotiator
Need to know as a communication standard is up here. Five Levels of Communication • Niceties: Nice to see you. Have a good day. • Factual: I live in Boston • Evaluative: I like your idea • Gut Level: I was sad when you were absent. • Peak: When you critiqued me, I was terrified that I was a failure. More And More And More Vulnerable
More disclosure; more marital satisfaction. • More sexual disclosure; more sexual satisfaction
See page 56 in Clicking for Youngme Moon’s experiment with vulnerability. She is the author of DIFFERENT.
Proximity • West Point Cadets • Who becomes best friends with whom? • 90% predicted by? • First letter in last name • Sat alphabetically in every class. • PASSIVE CONTACT BUILDS RELATIONSHIPS
Proximity • Florida Gators • Tried hard to win NCAA basketball championship • 1987 through 2005 and failed • The Oh Fours-Their start year 2004 • Random housing assignment • NCAA champs 2005 • NBA contract offers • They stayed • NCAA champs 2006
Proximity • Next year the Oh Fours all went pro • Gators lost in NCAA • None of the Oh Fours achieved in the NBA at the same level.
People are exponentially more likely to form a relationship with people who live and work close by.
How Does This Apply To: • Your management team? • Your Sales Staff? • Your members?
Presence • Undivided attention • Mutuality-focus on meeting you where you are • NOT giving advice • Not solving a problem • Aware of your emotions and not hiding them • Involved: sharing and asking
Similarity • Clicking happens when people share similarities. • The type of similarity is irrelevant. • ‘Hating onion’ is a powerful as hating ‘Obama’ • If some requests a donation and have the same name as you do, donations DOUBLE!
Safe Place Shared adversity -Outward Bound -Biggest looser challenge -My team vs. your team Reduces emotional barriers Bonds
Safe Place A Framed Community -Kibbutz -REX Roundtable: Helping Hands -Hog Rider -Mary Kaye Part of Something Larger Than Oneself Clear ‘In’ and ‘Out’
Actions for You • Hire high self monitors. • Use the Self Monitoring Scale • Keep a hiring batting average • Debrief and learn and get better at this. • Commit to your business being a SAFE PLACE • Use the REX safe place commitments.
Actions for You • Model Proximity • Read the Hidden Dimension by Edward Hall • Creating a touching culture at your club • Deepen Vulnerability • Model it, take personal, risks with staff • Use the Jo Hari Window in staff training