13: Inter-Act, 13 th Edition

1. 13: Inter-Act, 13th Edition Intimate Relationships

2. Intimacy • A pattern of self-disclosure and supportive messages between partners • May have many friends, but only a handful of intimate relationships • Intimacy resides in the “inter-action” between partners.

3. Intimate Conversations • Emotionaldisclosures: reveal sensitive, private, and personally risky information, signaling a desire for intimacy • Mutual understanding: comprehending your own and your partner’s point of view • Warm feelings: positive feelings you have about yourself and your partner during and immediately after an interaction • Verbal and nonverbal messages signal closeness.

4. Intimate Relationship Relationship in which partners share regular intimate interactions, feel affection for each other, trust each other, and are cohesive Mutual Affection Cohesiveness Trust

5. Family A network of people who share their lives over long periods of time bound by ties of marriage, blood, or commitment, legal or otherwise, who consider themselves a family, and who share a significant history and anticipated future of functioning in a family relationship (Galvin, Bylund, & Brommel, 2003)

6. Common Family Structures

7. Parent–Child Communication • Nurturing parental communication: parental messages that encourage a child’s physical, social, emotional, and intellectual development • Controlling parental communication: parental messages that attempt to influence or regulate a child’s behavior Good parenting requires a balance of nurturing and controlling messages.

8. Infant Attachment Styles

9. Adult Attachment Styles

10. Providing Discipline • Permissiveparenting style: moderate to high levels of nurturing but little control over children’s behavior • Authoritarian parenting style: high levels of control with low levels of nurturing • Authoritative parenting style: firm control balanced with ample nurturing

11. Improving Family Communication • Create opportunities for intimate communication. • Respect individual interests and accomplishments. • Recognize and adapt to change.

12. Friendships • Voluntary, platonic relationships characterized by equality and reciprocity • Likely to form between people who have frequent contact and similar demographic traits and engage in the same activities

13. Relationships are based on shared activities. Talk about topics rather than feelings Use covert intimacy to show closeness: Mild insults Competition Put-downs Conversations focus on topics as well as relationships. Intimacy is based on mutual self-disclosure of feelings, secrets, and insights. Male–Male Relationships Female–Female Relationships

14. Intimate Relationships Platonic Relationship Partners are not sexually attracted to each other or choose not to act on their attraction Romantic Relationship Partners do act on their sexual attraction to each other

15. Types of Long-Term Committed Relationships • Traditional –share a traditional ideology but maintain some independence, engage in conflict • Independent –share an ideology that embraces change and uncertainty, but are interdependent and engage in conflict • Separate –share traditional ideology, but are independent and avoid conflict

16. Characteristics of Intimate Relationships • Mutual respect: treating each other with dignity • Presence of a shared plan or life vision: agreeing on long-term goals • Comfortable level of closeness: spending a mutually satisfying amount of time with each other

17. Keys to Successful Long-Term Relationships • Show your affection. • Use symbols and rituals to display your commitment. • Talk about sex. Microsoft Photo

18. The Dark Side of Intimacy • Relational uncertainty – feeling of doubt about the nature of the relationship • Unsure if relationship is platonic or romantic • Concern about future • Tension between closeness and separation • Possessiveness – desire to control another person to ensure exclusivity • Caused by jealousy • Can occur in platonic and family relationships as well as romantic ones

19. Digital Communication Skills • Media multiplexity: using more than one form of social media to communicate in relationships • Strong social media ties: friends, romantic partners, and family members • Weak social media ties: casual contacts loosely connected to social networks

20. Initiating Relationships Online • Social Information Processing (SIP) theory explains how relationships evolve online. • Revealing and seeking personal information reduces uncertainty. • Online relationships require more time to develop. • Digital interaction can be intense and overly intimate (hyperpersonal).