Gay and Lesbian Families

1. By: Kryn Palmquist Gay and Lesbian Families

2. I want to provide the class with an overview of the current legal issues for lesbian and gay parents and their children in the United States today, a summary of the relevant data/literature, and start a discussion on what YOU think about these issues and how it will relate to becoming a counselor. My Main Point

3. Legal and policy questions pertaining to gays and lesbians has been the subject of debate more so now than ever. Legalization of same-sex marriage Adoption laws for same sex couples How and in what ways should laws and policies regulate the family lives of lesbian and gay citizens? (Patterson, 2009) The Debate

4. Is this a religious debate? Should we base our opinion more on fundamental rights or what our religion tells us? What about empirical evidence? (Patterson, 2009) From a Psychologist Standpoint

5. Overview of current legal and policy issues that pertain directly to gay and lesbian parents in the United States Summary of research evidence about development and adjustment among children of lesbian and gay parents Comments on the relevance of research to legal and policy decisions, and also recommendations for change (Patterson, 2009) 3 Main Parts

6. Should be noted the diversity within the gay and lesbian world • There are children who are born of a mom and a dad, then either mom or dad starts dating someone of the same sex • Children who are born into same sex couples • Patterson, 2009 Diversity

7. Custody Cases- • “The right to marry and the right to rear children have both been seen as a fundamental in American law”…unless you’re gay or lesbian. • In 1990, no state offered legal same sex marriage (Joslin & Minter, 2008) • As of 2010, 6 states recognize same sex marriage: Connecticut, Massachusetts, Vermont, Iowa, Maine, and New Hampshire • Two states recognize marriage from outside jurisdictions, New York and Rhode Island • (Patterson, 2009) I. Legal

8. Visual-Gay Marriage Orange with white stripes= Recognizes out of jurisdiction marriages/civil unions Orange= Gay marriage is 100% legal Gold= Statewide law providing the equivalent of state-level spousal rights to same-sex couples within the state Yellow=Statewide law providing some statewide spousal rights to same-sex couples within the state

9. This map is from the Human Rights Campaign Website: • http://www.hrc.org/about_us/state_laws.asp • What is the Human Rights Campaign? • The Human Rights Campaign is America's largest civil rights organization working to achieve lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) equality. By inspiring and engaging all Americans, HRC strives to end discrimination against LGBT citizens and realize a nation that achieves fundamental fairness and equality for all. Human Rights Campaign

10. Boswell v. Boswell (1998) Bottoms v. Bottoms (1995) Pulliam v. Smith (1998) Burgess v. Burgess (1999) Court Cases

11. Maryland Visitation case The court refused to limit children’s visitation with their gay father in the presence of his partner because there was no evidence that this was doing harm to the child (Patterson, 2009) Boswell vs. Boswell (1999)

12. Virginia Supreme Court Reiterated its earlier holding that a lesbian mother is not unfit as a matter of law but included the other’s sexual orientation among factors considered to make her an undesirable parent In some states, lesbian and gay parents may have to overcome preexisting assumptions about their sexual orientation Patterson, 2009 Bottoms v. Bottoms (1995)

13. North Carolina Denied custody to a gay father because of the court’s concern about the father’s long term relationship with another man and the influence it may have on the children Patterson, 2009 Pulliam v. Smith (1998)

14. Indiana Refused a gay father’s request for review of a lower court’s decision that denied him custody of his son Although, Indiana does not have a law against gay parenting in a custody case, the court however noted that the father’s sexual orientation “raises the specter of an aberrant lifestyle” (Burgess v. Burgess, 1999). Burgess v. Burgess (1999)

15. Who is creating this idea that gay and lesbian couples are not fit to parent based on their sexual orientation? What do you think the statistics are in relationship of same sex couples to different sex couples? (Regarding child development, personal development and social relationships) Questions for thought

16. Two kinds of adoption • Stranger Adoptions-adopt from biological parents who are unwilling or unable to rear their children • Parent Adoptions-sought by families that wish to establish legal status for the 2nd parent without terminating the rights or responsibilities of the first legal parent • Patterson, 2009 Legalities for Adoption and Foster Care

17. Parenting Laws Dark Blue= Where second-parent adoption is an option for same-sex couples statewide. Light Blue= States where same-sex couples have successfully petitioned for second-parent adoption in some jurisdictions

18. Children’s Gender Development Children’s Personal Development Children’s Social Relationships II. Summary of Literature

19. Common Myth: Gender development of children who are reared of gay and lesbian parents may be compromised • Concerns: • Mental sense of oneself being either male or female • Gendered behavior • Development of sexual orientation • Patterson, 2009 Children’s Gender Development

20. In many studies, research has failed to note a significant difference in development in children being reared by lesbian and gay couples as compared to children being reared in heterosexual couples. Green & colleagues reported no differences with respect to favorite television shows and characters, games, or toys. (Green, Mandel, Hotvedt, Gray, & Smith 1986) Children’s Gender Development

21. Assessment- Preschool Activities Inventory • Used to assess gender development among children • Reports no significant difference between homosexual parents rearing children and heterosexual parents rearing children • (Brewaeys, Ponjaert, Van Hall, & Golombok, 1997) Children’s Gender Development

22. Many researchers have also studied the sexual orientation of children of gay and lesbian parents Stats are stats-10% of the population is homosexual, doesn’t matter who raises the child- a heterosexual couple is just as likely to have a gay or lesbian child as a homosexual couple (Patterson, 2009) Children’s Gender Development 10%

23. Research has assessed the following: separation-individuation, psychiatric evaluations, behavior problems and competencies, self-concept, locus of control, moral judgment, school adjustment, intelligence, victimization, and substance abuse. (Patterson, 2000, 2006) Children’s Personal Development

24. These aspects of personal development have shown researchers that there are no major differences between the offspring of lesbian or gay parents and those of heterosexual parents. (Patterson, 2009) Children’s Personal Development

25. The concern: • Children and adolescents with lesbian or gay parents have problems with social relationships (especially with peers) • Once again, research has show repeatedly that children and adolescents of lesbian and gay parents report normal social relationships with family members, peers, and with adults outside of their nuclear family. • (Patterson, 2009) Children’s Social Relationships

26. The real problem of growing up with gay or lesbian parents: • Harassment from children growing up with heterosexual parents • This is the major piece that affects the development of children of gay and lesbian parents • (Gartrell, Deck, Rodas, Peyser, & Banks, 2005) Children’s Social Relationships

27. What if it turns out that same-sex couples are not only to be just as good parents as heterosexuals, but better parents? • What are some reasons this could occur? • Many children of heterosexuals are unplanned and unwanted-failure or carelessness use of birth control • Unwanted children tend not to do well in development (Ferenczi, 1929). Recommendations for change

28. Over 25 years of research has been done and there is no data to support the idea that gay and lesbian couples are unfit to rear children based solely on their sexual orientation Patterson, 2009 Research says:

29. How can you apply what you learned from my presentation into your daily practice as a future counselor? What are some problems you can visualize that you may encounter serving this population? How can you show you are culturally sensitive to this group? discussion

30. Sue and Karen have a 5 year old son who is acting out in school. He is throwing things at others, not listening to teacher’s directives, getting out of his chair at inappropriate times, and getting into small fights with peers. Karen and Sue have joined custody of their son Eric. Eric is having no behavior problems at home. Karen and Sue bring Eric in to be evaluated by you. What are some questions you would want to ask Eric? How would you assess the family? Case study

31. Boswell v. Boswell, 352 Md. 204; 721 A. 2d 662 (1998). Bottoms v. Bottoms, No. 941166 (Va. 1995). Brewaeys, A., Ponjaert, I., Van Hall, E.V., & Golombok, S. (1997). Donor insemination: Child development and family functioning in lesbian mother families. Human Reproduction,12, 1349-1359. Burgess v. Burgess, 708 N.E. 2d 930; 1999 Ind. App. LEXIS 300. Ferenczi, S. (1929). The unwelcome child and his death instinct. Final Contributions to the Problems and Methods of Psychoanalysis, 102-107. Gartell, N., Deck, A., Rodas, C., Peyser, H., & Banks, A. (2005). The National Lesbian Family Study: 4. Interviews with the 10-year-old children. American Journal of Orthopsychiatry, 75, 518-524. Green,R., Mandel, J. B., Hotvedt, M. E., Gray, J., & Smith, L. (1986). Lesbian mothers and their children: A comparison with solo parent heterosexual mothers and their children. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 15, 167-184. References

32. Human Rights Campaign. Maps of State Laws & Policies. http://www.hrc.org/about_us/state_laws.asp Patterson, C. J. (2000). Family relationships of lesbians and gay men. Journal of Marriage and Family, 62, 1052-1069. Patterson, C. J. (2006). Children of lesbian and gay parents. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 15, 241-244. Patterson, C. (2009). Children of lesbian and gay parents: Psychology, law, and policy. American Psychologist. 727-736. Pulliam v. Smith, 348 N.C. 616; 501 S.E.2d 898 (1998). References