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Surfing for Managers

Surfing for Managers. How to Lead Your Team and Stay on Board When Change Comes in Waves. Mapping the Waves. It’s more than one wave. Mapping the Waves. How people experience and adapt to change depends on which wave they ride. The Conformer Wave.

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Surfing for Managers

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  1. Surfing for Managers How to Lead Your Team and Stay on Board When Change Comes in Waves

  2. Mapping the Waves It’s more than one wave

  3. Mapping the Waves How people experience and adapt to change depends on which wave they ride.

  4. The Conformer Wave • There’s a right way, and it’s the way we’ve been doing things, • Change means what I’ve done before is no longer valued. • This is just not fair. • It’s hard for me to trust anyone who thinks this is a good idea.

  5. The Conformer Wave • Model desired behavior. • Praise specific performance and progress. • Provide clear guidelines. • Provide consistent paths and structures for advancement.

  6. The Expert Wave • There’s a right way to do things based on proven methods. • I know my job and nobody can tell me how to do it better. • Changes that upset my routines and reliable processes are a waste of time and money. • If my expertise is outmoded, I’m in big trouble. I am my expertise.

  7. The Expert Wave • Respect expertise. • Give individual attention. • Frame cooperation and adaptation as skills. • Provide pathways for applying expertise to learning new skills.

  8. The Achiever Wave • I can do this as long as others don’t get in my way. • Let me at it! • I don’t get what the fuss is about. • Can we just get on with it?

  9. The Achiever Wave • Affirm self-direction. • Coach to develop awareness and appreciation of teams/others. • Brief, implement, debrief.

  10. The Strategists Wave • Everybody’s right (unless they’re wrong). • This is complex! • What does “fair” mean, anyway? • How do I see this challenge? • How do they see this challenge? • How can we frame a common challenge?

  11. The Strategists Wave • No whitewashing. • Modest, recoverable steps. • Encourage focus and simplicity. • Offer choice. • Acknowledge complexity • Dialogue, collaboration. • Creativity. • Balance.

  12. Getting on the Board The 4-column exercise that follows is from the work of Robert Kegan and Lisa Laskow Lahey as it appears in their book How the Way We Talk Can Change the Way We Work.

  13. What sorts of things… …, if they were to happen more frequently, would you experience as being more supportive of your own ongoing development at work?

  14. Ground Rules • DO write out your responses. • DO NOTcensor or filter your responses. • DO choose a partner to whom you do not have a reporting or subordinate relationship. • Listener(s): Your job is to listen, not to not to help. • Speaker: You have sole discretion over what you share and in what level of detail. No advice! No fixing! No helping!

  15. The Language of Complaint

  16. What’s at stake? What values, commitments, or convictions do you hold that are actually implied in your complaints?

  17. The 4-column worksheet

  18. Automatic, reflexive What we can’t stand Feels whiny, cynical Generates frustration Complaints = wrong Dead ends Intentional What we stand for Feels hopeful Generates focus Complaint = care Goal-directed Complaint vs. Commitment

  19. What are you doing… …ornot doing that is keeping your commitment from being fully realized?

  20. The 4-column worksheet

  21. Easy, reflexive Holds others responsible Polarizes Generates defense Dead ends Questions for others Takes work Specific, personal, actionable Builds momentum Generates dialogue Opportunities Raises questions for self Blame vs Responsibility

  22. What fear or discomfort… … can you notice with respect to how you fall short of fully living up to your commitment?

  23. What are you committed … …to (or committed to preventing) in order to avoid that fear or discomfort?

  24. 3rd Column Checkpoint • The “creep out” indicator • Not noble • Names a form of self-protection that competes with our 1st column commitment

  25. The 4-column worksheet

  26. Sincere, genuine intentions Creates hopes for the future Problematic behavior is shameful Attributes ineffectiveness to outside causes (other people, circumstances) Rarely leads to significant change despite sincerity Genuine countervailing commitments Map of inner contradiction Problematic behavior is a successful strategy Acknowledges complex, contradictory nature of own intentions Makes significant change possible by revealing the nature of the blocks New Year’s Resolutions vs Competing Commitments

  27. The 4-column worksheet

  28. Build an assumptive stem. Positive in 3rd column to negative: “I assume thatif I did not …” Negative in 3rd column to positive: “I assumethat if I did …”

  29. Complete your assumption. Complete the sentence that starts with your assumptive stem. Write it in the 4th column of the worksheet.

  30. Everyday Surfing How will you use this tomorrow? • Listen • Inquire • Reframe

  31. Listen • For the values or commitment beneath a complaint. • For the wave. • For the nature of the fear or discomfort for THIS person on THIS wave.

  32. Listen • For big assumptions. • For openings to reveal assumptions. • For opportunities to test assumptions.

  33. Inquire • How does this challenge keep us from living up to our standards? • What could you/we have done differently to experience better results? • What is at risk? For whom?

  34. Inquire • What assumptions are at work? • What have you/we done to test these assumptions? • What can we do now to test these assumptions? • What modest, recoverable steps can we take to test our assumptions?

  35. Reframe • Complaint as commitment. • Resistance and non-cooperation as competing commitments. • Fears and discomfort as unexamined assumptions.

  36. Reframe: Strategist • Complaint as commitment. • Resistance and non-cooperation as competing commitments. • Fears and discomfort as unexamined assumptions.

  37. Reframe: Conformer • It’s a challenge and here are the means to meet it. • These are the steps you can take to succeed now. • Given your strengths, you can ...

  38. Reframe: Expert • Opportunity for you to grow your expertise. • Adaptation, collaboration, compromise are skills. • Ambiguity and complexity require technical discernment.

  39. Reframe: Achiever • A chance to shine. • Respect for others as key to achieving goals. • Adjusting to other styles as learning/leading opportunity. • Manage energy and relation-ships for long term success.

  40. Reframe: Strategists • Now we’re surfing! • Multiple waves = challenge and growth. • Complexity Flexibility Possibility • Feedback (even when it hurts) is a good thing.

  41. Follow Up/Request Slides Molly Gordon, MCC Shaboom Inc. Life could be a dream… PO Box 195 Suquamish, WA 98392-0195 P360-697-7022 F 206-201-5020 www.mollygordon.com mgordon@mollygordon.com

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