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Values

Values What is most important to us Genesis 2:24 “a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh” Values and Marriage You and your spouse come from a different background but are becoming one.

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Values

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  1. Values What is most important to us

  2. Genesis 2:24 • “a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh”

  3. Values and Marriage • You and your spouse come from a different background but are becoming one. • God has brought you two together for a mission unique only to you. (Don’t be some other couple) • If you find out what God has made most important to you, you will begin to see His mission for you.

  4. Values – Why do we do what we do? • Values dictate what is most important to us and what we refuse to budge on “lines in the sand” • For many years God led you on a path to shape your values separately • Now He is bringing them together.

  5. If you had to choose? • You just heard that you have cancer and only 3 years to live • You no longer have time to do everything you do now • What will you stop doing and what will you put your energy towards?

  6. What do you want to be known for? • Instead you both lived for another 40 years • Imagine that you and your spouse just passed away. • At the funeral each of your children decided to buy something that symbolizes something important to you. • What would they buy or make that would remind them of what you were all about? • Write down on your “values sheet” the values these items represent in you.

  7. Timeline • Divide a piece of paper into 3 sections. Childhood, teen years, and together • Write down your fondest memories on the timeline. Place it near the top for really good or near the line for just okay

  8. Our Wedding Hiking with Dad Vacation to Canada Teaching Job First Car First day of School Together Teenage Years Childhood

  9. What do these events tell you? • Which events made you feel like, “I was made for this?” How come? • How about the rest of them, why are they important to you? • How did this event shape you?

  10. Homework • Continue to fill out the value sheet • Write down what is most important to both of you. • Tomorrow we’ll pull it all together and discover “our mission”

  11. Mission Why did God bring us together?

  12. Where are you going? • If you don’t care where you are going then any road will do…

  13. Esther 4:14b • “And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?” - Modecai to Esther

  14. God raises up people • Joseph – to save his family • Moses – to bring Israel out of Egypt • Solomon – to build the temple • Daniel – to witness to the Kings • Nehemiah – to restore the wall

  15. What is a mission statement • Answers, “Why did God bring us together” • What is our unique contribution we have been called to make? • Short enough to fit on a T-shirt • Motivational

  16. Theme Hunting • Pull out your “Values Sheet” • Group your values together by different colours • If something is really important circle it more than once • Write a 3-5 word phrase summarizing each grouping • Is this an “end” or a means to an end?

  17. Relational Intimacy Personal Growth Friends Minimal Fitness Going to Church Personal andSpiritual Growth Ministry Family Helping Others Grow Life-Long Learning Having an Impact Relationships Spiritual Growth Eternal Significance

  18. God-Centered • We cannot divide our lives into our part and God’s part – all of our lives are drenched with the supernatural and God is part of all of our lives. This journey we are on is really a journey with God.

  19. Personal Growth • Central to our mission is that we ourselves are growing and are not satisfied to stay as we are. Growth is holistic – spiritually, intellectually, socially, mental, and physical.

  20. Helping others grow • We want our lives to make a difference. We believe that God has given us special gifts and abilities to help others grow in their spiritual and personal journeys.

  21. Authentic Relationships • People are important to us! We do not want to be alone, neither do we want to turn all of our relationships into ministry transaction void of true friendship, instead, we want strong relationships where we can be ourselves. Of greatest importance are God, then each other, then family then friends.

  22. Giving our best • In the end everything we do is for God so we want to give God our best efforts in all that we attempt. This value is applied in work by doing our best, in finances by being good stewards and being generous, in relationships by being our best and in spirituality by giving up sin and living a life devoted to God.

  23. Rest • We believe that God wants us to enjoy life and not just burn ourselves out. Rest includes such activities as TV, biking, games, story, sleeping and just having fun.

  24. Write your mission statement • Create a slogan that captures your key values in one statement • Need to be short enough to remember • Needs to be you! • Examples…

  25. Moses • “Draw out God’s people”

  26. Joshua • “Bring God’s people into God’s rest”

  27. Nehemiah • “Rebuild the wall”

  28. Jesus • “To seek and to save the lost”

  29. The Apostle Paul • “To preach Christ where he has not been preached before”

  30. Chris and Cory • “We are on a journey of becoming and we are inviting others to join us”

  31. You

  32. Tips: • Keep it short • It should cover your larger life not just this year. • It should motivate you enough so you get up in the morning • Don’t cover the how’s (that comes later) • Make sure it is you!

  33. Homework • Polish off your marriage mission statement • Polish off your values

  34. How are we going to get there?

  35. How will you get there? • A mission statement is useless if it collects dust. • We have to make choices or we will just drift through life.

  36. Why Plan? • Mt 25 – Stewardship of our lives • Gen 2:24 – Part of going from being two to being one • Surrender of the will to God

  37. Wild Ideas • If I gave everyone • a blank cheque • got someone to cover all your responsibilities • What kind of things could you possibly do to see your mission fulfilled.

  38. Life Projection • Go back to your life chart • If things continue as they are what can you expect from your future (Status-quo) • What if you focused your values, what could you expect to see.

  39. Values Lived Out • For each of your values write down • What would you look like 20 years from now if you lived it out? • What prevents you from seeing that reality? • What can you change so that reality becomes real?

  40. Authentic Relationships • To deliberately take time to build strong and authentic relationships between God, then each other, then our family, then our friends. • Combines values relationships, giving our best, helping others grow • This relates to our mission in that we cannot invite others to join us unless we have people involved in our lives

  41. Authentic Relationships Plan • Weekly date between each of us • Weekly visit with family and regular visits to interior BC • Become a “great” uncle and aunte • Make our home safe for friends

  42. Helping Others Grow • Embrace (or create) environments that will invite people to take another step in their spiritual journey • Serve in Belize • Speak at Conferences and Retreats

  43. Spiritual Growth • To have a thorough knowledge of God’s Word applied in a daily intimate relationship with God. • Daily: Read the Bible every night • Weekly: Study together for 1 hour a week • Quarterly: Evening of Prayer and Planning • Yearly: Go on retreat for reflection, prayer, evaluation and planning

  44. Homework • What are 3 things that you can do in 90 days that will make 50% of a difference

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