Sampath Paragraph Feedback

1. SampathParagraph Feedback characterization, analysis, supporting claims, smooth writing

2. Pull Out a Highlighter & a Pen! • As we go through this feedback, highlight ON YOUR WORK ANY of the issues that show up in YOUR writing! • Then, on the colored scrap paper I hand out, make a list of the issues here that effected your – you will look back on this list the next time you write!

3. Writing Clear Claims Merely Descriptive / Summary Evaluative • Sampath is too naïve and lazy for his own good. • Given his imagination and unique outlook, Sampath is destined for a positive future. • While he does trouble others with his antics, Sampath deserves to seek inner peace. • Sampath is restricted by his society. • Sampath finally finds peace at the end of the story. • Sampath causes problems for others.

4. Do’s & Don’ts When Writing About Literature • No personal pronouns: I, you, me, my, we, us… • Don’t end your paragraph with a quotation • If this was a full essay, you would include the author’s name and the title of the piece in your intro • Identifying titles (MLA format): • short works (stories, poems, songs, articles, chapters, etc…) are put in “quotation marks” • long works (books, magazines, movies, plays, etc…) are underlined or italicized • Stick to literary present

5. Tense Shifting • Many of you shifted tenses throughout your paragraphs… • In most cases, when writing about literature, you will stick to simple present tense • Check all of your verbs and be sure they agree with your subject and maintain the appropriate tense • To change tense in quotations to better fit your writing, simply change the tense and use brackets. • Example: When he is at the wedding, he “[tosses] choices bit of food to the stray dogs,” showing…

6. Write STRONG Sentences! Sampath the protagonist in Desai’s novel /is restricted by his society. Subject Predicate • Fragments  sentences that are missing a subject (main noun) or a predicate (main verb) • Run-ons  more than one idea in a sentence OR more than one subjector predicate • Often a result of poor punctuation • Awkward Writing  some writing was simply “clunky” or “funky,” let’s keep working on this! • read your work OUT LOUD, if it sounds weird, it’s because it is… your ears hear that which your eye overlooks Simple subject Verb

7. Quotation Blending: This is an ART! • We will work MUCH more on this all year long; ALL of you should endeavor to work on this art • Quotations are used to highlight YOUR ideas and to support YOUR claim, they cannot speak for themselves • They should be incorporated INTO YOUR sentences, they should not stand alone on their own • Phrases like “this quotation shows…” or “ as seen in the quotation…”  don’t write explicitly about your quotations, blend more smoothly than that

8. Great examples: • His own father calls him “an absolute good for nothing” (42) after he losses his job. • Sampath’s actions show he is a risk-taker and a rebel, like when he “[begins] to disrobe” (45) and “[leaps] from the window of the stalled bus” (49). • Kiran Desai succeeds in expressing this feeling of angst and frustration when she mentions the crone “[using] her voice like a needle to reach and poke” (49).

9. MLA In-Text Parenthetical Citation • He displays his hatred for his life by comparing it to “a prison he had been born into” filled with “a never ending flow of misery” (43). End Mark after parenthesis Quotations marks Page number in parenthesis after the quotation this is MY work, GIVE ME CREDIT PROPERLY