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This session focuses on enhancing your thesis statement writing skills and structuring effective conclusion sentences. Participants will review examples of both strong and weak thesis statements related to the emotional and psychological impacts of the Vietnam and Iraq wars on soldiers. The goal is to identify effective comparisons and contrasts, and learn how to improve weaker statements. Additionally, we will participate in peer critiques to refine our work further and explore organization of ideas and topic sentence drafting.
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Friday, January 13 Objectives: • Review thesis statements • Learn how to write an effective conclusion sentence • Continue to draft topic sentences and organize order of ideas
Effective Thesis Statements All Difference: The outside influences that soldiers encountered had a more negative effect on the morale of soldiers in Vietnam than in Iraq. By being unable to sustain strong relationships, soldiers in Vietnam struggled more than soldiers in Iraq with the toll the war left on them
Effective Thesis Statements All Similarity: In both [the Vietnam and Iraq] wars, combat forced the lives and relationships of soldiers to dramatically change, [negatively] affecting their emotional well being.
Effective Thesis Statements Split: Similarity and Difference Both the Iraq and Vietnam wars had crippling effects on the American soldiers involved, but the challenges faced in Vietnam produced more widespread suffering during and after the actual war
Ineffective Thesis Statements Listing Sub-topics: Soldiers in the two wars were similar in recreation and leisure time, but different in treatment of the enemy and gear.
Ineffective Thesis Statements No comparison between the two wars: War has a very damaging effect on soldier’s psychological well-being.
Ineffective Thesis Statements No position or argument: Soldiers in Iraq and Vietnam both had problems and faced many situations.
Ineffective Thesis Statements Weak 2nd Half: The US soldiers in Vietnam underwent terrible stress that damaged their ability to build healthy relationships, than in Iraq.
Ineffective Thesis Statements Unclear, Awkward, Tangled Phrasing: Even though the soldiers faced trouble more than in the conflicts, in Vietnam coping strategies of soldiers effectively helped rather than in Iraq.
Peer-critique • Look over the sheet of thesis statments and describe the weakness in each using both the categories that I gave you and your own reactions. • Choose two to revise.