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Communication and relationships

Communication and relationships. The intergenerational dynamic Mary Crowley National Academy for Parenting Practitioners. Relationships.

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Communication and relationships

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  1. Communication and relationships The intergenerational dynamic Mary Crowley National Academy for Parenting Practitioners

  2. Relationships • “Human relationships and the effects of relationships on relationships, are the building blocks of healthy development. From the moment of conception to the finality of death, intimate and caring relationships are the fundamental mediators of successful human adaptation” Shonkoff A and Phillips D(eds) 2000 “From neurons to neighbourhoods: the science of early childhood development . http://books.nap.edu/books/0309069882/htm/index.html • “Those who were protected, respected and treated with honesty as children, will have no choice but to protect and respect those weaker than themselves” Alice Miller, (The Drama of Being a Child)

  3. Allan Shore “Rethinking the brain” 1997 • Brain development depends on both genes and experience • Rapid brain development takes place in the first year of life • Early interactions directly affect the way the brain is wired “use it or lose it” • Early relationships set the thermostat for later control of stress response

  4. Impact of Neglect on Developing Brain

  5. Peri-natal programmes • Olds Family Nurse Partnership - intensive home visiting programme • The Centre for Parent and Child support- promoting a partnership model of support (Crispin Day) • PIPPIN and Lifeline programmes • The Social Baby and The Social Toddler - (The Children’s Project) • The Solihull Approach • Brazelton - Training in the Neonatal Behaviour Assessment Scale (NBAS)

  6. Erini Flouri and Ann Buchanan ESRC study based on NCDSann.buchanan@applied-social-studies.ac.uk • Once fathers are “involved” they remain so • Father involvement:more satisfactory marital relations • Children are less likely to be in trouble with the police • It plays a protective role against psychological problems in adolescents where parents have separated; this effect is stronger for daughters • Father involvement at age 7 predicts higher educational attainment by age 20 – girls and boys • Good father-child relations are associated with an absence of emotional and behavioural difficulties in adolescence and greater academic motivation

  7. 2003 Prof Charles Desforges with Alberto Abouchaar The Impact of Parental Involvement, Parental Support and Family Education on Pupil Achievement and Adjustment: a Literature Review DfES Report 433 • “Parental involvement in the form of "at-home good parenting" has a significant positive effect on children's achievement and adjustment even after all other factors shaping attainment have been taken out of the equation. In the primary age range the impact caused by different levels of parental involvement is much bigger than differences associated with variations in the quality of schools. The scale of the impact is evident across all social classes and all ethnic groups”.

  8. Adolescence:NFPI research with 11-16 year olds found that the majority (75%) got on with their parents, felt they loved them and were cared for by them. (2002) • Growth outstrips muscular development • Ability to recognise signals of common emotions reduced • 800%+ increase in testosterone (and GCSEs) • IPPR 2006 report shows that having a warm and loving relationship with a parent can override the impact of living in a lone-parent family • Parents’ job is to do themselves out of a job

  9. Programmes • Trust for the Study of Adolescence • Parentline Plus • Strengthening Families (Carol Kumpfer) • Triple P Teens • Toolkit for Commissioners • www.parentingacademy.org

  10. Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health:Helpful Parenting • A growing body of research shows that our familiar assumptions about bringing up children are not always correct • Early experience in the family influences a child’s ability to develop relationships built on tolerance, respect for others and socially responsible behaviour • Behaviour management?

  11. THE CONTRIBUTION MADE BY PARENTING PROGRAMMES TO THE DEVELOPMENT OF RESPECT IN CHILDREN, YOUNG PEOPLE AND FAMILIES Hetty Einzig 2002 (www.parentinguk.org) • Within the parent-child relationship trust is freely and abundantly given by the child to the parent, but not always the other way. Respect is often demanded by parent or teacher but not always given to the child. Children are frequently subjected to a good ‘talking to’ but how often do they get a ‘good listening to’? • Boundaries are needed. Robin Skynner “Families and How to Survive them”

  12. Building a Europe for and with Children: Council of Europe 2008 • A Europe-wide awareness- raising initiative; a human rights imperative for Europe’s children • Hitting adults is called assault • Hitting animals is called cruelty • Hitting children is “for their own good”

  13. Respect in Relationships at Work • In a study by ISR (Institute for Social Research) in 2002 of employee engagement, the top driver of engagement (over values, alignment or ethical behaviour) for workers from all sectors in the UK is the level of respect that managers show to their staff members.

  14. Support for families • “Parents have always needed support in the raising of their children”(Pugh Charitable Trusts - USA) • Support should be respect based and should model the parent-child relationship • Parenting services not the same as teaching or treating children or adults who are ill • Knowledge and skills; evidence base models

  15. National Academy for Parenting Practitioners • Launched November 2007 • Partnership of ParentingUK; Kings College London and FPI • Training, Research, Information sharing • “To transform the quality and size of the parenting workforce across England so that parents can get the help they need to raise their children well” • www.parentingacademy.org

  16. “A Very Important Profession”BBC World Service programme about parenting around the world 1 Love infuses all parenting principles 2 Every child needs respect 3 Every child needs to be listened to 4 Good parenting provides boundaries and limits, enforced by alternatives to physical violence 5 Act as you want your child to act 6 There is no such thing as a perfect parent: involve others 7 Have fun with your child 8 Be willing to learn from your children 9 Be realistic about the world but give your child the confidence to try 10 Attempt to understand and respond to your child

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