Communication in Relationships

1. Communication in Relationships By, Becca Bedford, Kelsey Carey, Will Finlay, Creighton Segars, and Stephen Newman

2. How do we use communication? • Find out information about each other • Define our relationships

3. Types of relationships • Girl-Girl • Guy-Guy • Girl-Guy Platonic • “FriendZone”

4. Girl-Girl Friendships • An intimate relationship between two girls however they feel no sexual attraction towards one another • Characterized by trust and ability to communicate about personal topics with each other • Differs greatly from a Boy-Boy platonic relationship

5. Why is a Girl-Girl Platonic relationship so important? • Study by Stacey J. Oliker – “Best Friends and Marriage: Exchange Among Women” • These relationships impact who women marry • Relationships impact the marriage in several ways • Things that bring women together in these types of friendships are not the same as men • Effects on family life

6. How do Girl-Girl platonic relationships differ from other types of relationships? • Study by Daniel J. Canary and Kathryn Dindia – “Sex Differences and Similarities in Communication” • Differences in the topics discussed • How big of a factor is gender in communication? • Differences in the way they communicate • Stereotypes

7. Boy-Boy Platonic Relationships • A relationship between two males that does not consist of any sexual attraction towards one another • Close relationships are known as a “Bromance”

8. Bromance <3 • A non-sexual relationship between two men that are unusually close • The intense complicated love shared between two heterosexual males that consists of but not limited to wrestling, numerous man-dates, and tons of other stories that will only remain between the two

9. What do guys even talk about? • Robin Thicke Interview • Haas and Sherman study in 1982 • Examples: • Joey and Chandler from “Friends” • Step Brothers

10. What is a platonic relationship? • an intimate relationship in which the partners are not sexually attracted to each other or do not act on an attraction they feel

11. What works? • Open communication • Honesty • Self-disclosure

12. What doesn’t work? • Man's need to provide and protect • Intimacy and emotional support • Sexual tension

13. Bleske-Rechek and Buss study  • Questionnaire regarding initiation, selection, and dissolution • Men use platonic relationships to gain sex • Women use as a strategy to gain protection • Both sexes use platonic friendship to acquire potential romantic partners

14. Forced Platonic Relationships: A.K.A. "The Friend Zone" • Nonsexual, intimate friendship • The decision to remain nonsexual is typically maintained by only one person • Friendship may have originated when the two were young children • Some level of sexual attraction, even though sex itself is avoided

15. Causes of the Friend Zone  • The woman is not sufficiently attracted to the man • The woman feels she is receiving ambiguous signals from the man as to the future of the relationship (lack of good communication) • Childhood friends "sibling like feeling between them” • Are actual siblings

16. Creating and Maintaining: Study by Messman, et. al  • Study by Messmen, Canary & Hause (2000)  • "Motives to remain platonic, equity use of maintenance strategies in opposite-sex friendships" • "This person may hurt me" -.80  • "I may be disappointed" -.67

17. Getting out • 71% of women say they would date a friend • Easier for women to get out of the friend zone • Prevention is best • Communicate your intentions accurately from day 1

18. Activity • You’re crossing Library Bridge… • What does a Girl-Girl conversation look like? • What does a Guy-Guy conversation look like? • What does a Girl-Guy conversation look like?