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Friday, January 17th Bell Work: Please pick up an Essay Peer Review handout from the front table and take out your essay rough draft. Find a partner to exchange essays with and trade papers. Use the first 15 minutes of class today to score their essay using the front side of the handout. Make sure to fill in any information requested on the front of the sheet.
Daily Agenda: • Bell-Ringer: Essay Peer Review • Word of the DayReview • Writing Workshop: The Comparison Essay • Lecture: River Valley Civilizations • Essay Revision • Discussion: turnitin.com Homework: Finish final draft of essay and submit to turnitin.com. Essential Question: What do AP graders expect in an essay? How do I plan, organize, and write an AP comparison essay?
GERRYMANDER- to divide a geographic area into voting districts so as to give unfair advantage to one party in elections Review Slide for Monday Pronunciation Modern Day Gerrymandering Click on the link above to view a clip from January 17, 2013, The Rachel Maddow Show where Rachel clearly and expertly explains how she believes Republicans gerrymandered and rigged the 2012 House election / vote so that fewer Republican votes elected more Republicans than Democrats and how they plan to gerrymander and rig the 2016 Presidential election / vote. (Like other political talk shows, this is subject to the commentators opinion.) January 17, Block 1
The Comparison Essay Guidelines and Expectations for Good AP Writing
Know the Rubric Comparison means to say what is the same and what is different. This says at LEAST one – you need THREE – Rule of 3!!! Analyze means to say “why” – why is there a difference or similarity (or to what degree)
So how do I set up my essay? Remember you only get points for pointing out the similarities and differences. Consider the following…
If you do the following… Where are you going to compare and contrast???
The following also has some issues Can work, but not always
Best format to get POINTS This requires a lot of prewriting – if you have time, do this!!!
Use Outline Thesis – Same as before – answer question, use groups, and give hints Political Goals and Outcomes Economic Goals and Outcomes Military Goals and Outcomes Evidence (at least 3 detailed comparisons) Evidence(at least 3 detailed comparisons) Evidence (at least 3 detailed comparisons) Conclusion
Common Problems Describing the two things/events separately (with great evidence) but never comparing and/or contrasting – NO POINTS FOR DESCRIBING Confusing dates, people, and places Running out of time and not finishing
Length: 3-7 sentences Organization: Background Argument Roadmap Background: Attention-Getter (prove you understand history/set the stage). Set the stage for your thesis. Argument (Thesis): Must be explicit, comparative, and avoid restating question. Roadmap: Indirectly describe how you will support your thesis (can be part of thesis) Thesis and Introduction
Length: About 7 sentences Organization: Topic sentence, evidence, analysis (repeat the last two three times) DON”T just talk about one, then talk about the other (parallel structure) Make DIRECT comparisons, and use effective transitions Use body paragraphs to prove or support your thesis Explain, don’t just list similarities and differences (analysis) Body Paragraphs
No points can be taken off for not having a conclusion But, it is your final chance to make sure that your argument is not lost (back-up thesis?) This is your chance to show you recognize the significance of your argument (Your answer to “So What?”) Conclusion
Mini-Lecture: Early Civilizations
1. Where did the earliest civilizations form and why? • River Valleys • Nile • Tigris / Euphrates • Indus • Huang He / Yangtze • Rivers provided irrigation, drinking water, and transportation • Why not other rivers?
2. What different forms of rule did the earliest civilizations use to keep order? Egypt Divine rule; pharaoh = god; bureaucracy Mesopotamia Lugals = “Big Men;” strong armies (Assyrians); use of priests China Mandate of Heaven (Divine Right); Confucian beliefs (Social Roles) India Samsara and caste system (social institutions) )
3. What factors helped determine the social structures of various early civilizations? • Free vs. Slave (Mesopotamia especially) • Land ownership (China) • Occupation • India • Mesopotamia • Egypt • Gender
4. Explain the interconnection between geography and religion in two early civilizations. Egypt Gods controlled environment beneficial flooding = nice gods; unified religion due to geographic isolation Mesopotamia Violent floods = Angry, vengeful gods; introduction of new religions (Judaism, Zoroastrianism, etc.) due to geographic “openness” China Mandate of Heaven illustrated by natural disasters
5. Was there gender equality in early societies? If not, what prevented it? All Neolithic societies women no longer play as much of a role in food acquisition China Confucianism held women in lower status than any male; men must “protect” women India Aryan beliefs made women the equivalent to lowest caste; sati Egypt Limited protections and rights for women, but not equivalent of men (few female leaders) Mesopotamia No female “Lugals” = no legal equality for women
Turnitin.com Using the link on the “Useful Links” page of the class wiki, register for or log-in to your turnitin.com account. After getting logged-in, you will need to use the tab on your dashboard to “Enroll in a Class.” Use 6874859for your class I.D. and WHAPfor the class password. Once you are enrolled, you should notice your first assignment waiting for you. While you wait for everyone else to get registered, click on the various tabs of your dashboard to familiarize yourself with the functions of this site.
Essay Revision Exchange your essay with a different partner. Using the back of the peer review handout, assist your partner in revising their essay. Make sure to fill in all of the requested information