Lecture 19

1. Lecture 19 Self-Concept Self-Awareness Self-Esteem Self-Disclosure COM 340 Intercultural Communication

2. l. Self-Concept • How you view yourself or your self image • A. Others’ Images of You • B. Social Comparisons • C. Cultural Teachings • D. Your Own Interpretations and Experiences COM 340 Intercultural Communication

3. II. Self-Awareness • The goal is to be as open of a communicator as possible • Johari Window: a tool that represents your communication behavior. COM 340 Intercultural Communication

4. Johari Window Known Not Known to Self to Self Open Blind Self Self Hidden Unknown Self Self Known to Others Not Known to Others COM 340 Intercultural Communication

5. III. Self-Esteem • Your own evaluation of worth • Attack your Self-Destructive Beliefs • Engage in Self-Affirmation • Seek Out Nourishing People • Work on Projects that will Result in Success COM 340 Intercultural Communication

6. IV. Self-Disclosure • Sharing previously unknown personal information and experiences with another person • A. Factors Influencing Self-Disclosure • Who You Are • Culture • Gender • Your Listeners • Topic COM 340 Intercultural Communication

7. IV. Self-Disclosure (con’t) • B. To be effective, self-disclosure includes: • feelings more than facts • greater breadth and depth over time • a focus on the present, not past • reciprocity COM 340 Intercultural Communication

8. Guidelines for Self-Disclosure • Discuss situations as they happen • Choose appropriate time and place • Choose appropriate level of disclosure • Share feelings and thoughts – move from self description to self-disclosure as appropriate COM 340 Intercultural Communication

9. Rewards of Self-Disclosure • Allows validation of one’s perception of reality • Brings psychological relief through sharing • Creates better lines of communication • Increases physiological health • Helps reduce stress, tension, and adversity • Addresses intimacy needs • Increases one’s self-awareness and self-understanding • Strengthens relationships COM 340 Intercultural Communication

10. Dangers of Self-Disclosure • Personal risks • Relational risks • Professional risks COM 340 Intercultural Communication

11. V. Communication in Developing Relationships • How does communication change as people go from casual encounters to a more committed relationship? COM 340 Intercultural Communication

12. A. Theory of Social Penetration • 1. As relationship progresses communica-tion increases in: • Breadth: number of topics discussed • Depth: intimacy of topics discussed • 2. Self-disclosure: changes over time • Initially mostly superficial • Later more meaningful • 3. “Quick encounters”: • Strangers on the bus: no continuation • Fast romances: may be vulnerable to fast termination COM 340 Intercultural Communication

13. B. Self-disclosure Reciprocity • 1. Greater among strangers than established partners. • 2. Once we feel close to someone, we do not feel the need to reciprocate immediately. • 3. However, when we are trying to become close to someone, immediate reciprocity in self-disclosure may be crucial in helping the relationship to grow. COM 340 Intercultural Communication

14. C. Privacy is important, too. • 1. People need their privacy even within the context of a close, intimate relationship. • 2. The theory of social penetration describes the way people develop the capacity to share and disclose with one another. • 3. Social penetration theory does not imply that we should always be making use of the capability to self-disclose to others. COM 340 Intercultural Communication

15. VI. Gender Differences in Communication • A. Self-disclosure: • 1. Females self-disclose more than males, particularly in regard to personal feelings. • 2. Males disclose personal facts. • B. Avoiding Self-disclosure • 1. Females are concerned about lack of response. • 2. Males are concerned about lack of practical assistance. COM 340 Intercultural Communication

16. C. The roles people play: Expressive versus Instrumental • 1. Women are more socially sensitive • Better at sending and receiving non-verbal messages. • Better listeners. • More empathic. • More consoling to others in distress. • 2. Men are more reliable • Young males: empathy leads to helping. • More reassuring, problem oriented, willing to compromise during conflict. COM 340 Intercultural Communication

17. C. The roles people play: Expressive versus Instrumental • 3. Women are more hostile and confusing • Express more negative emotion, are more coercive. • Use more double, contradictory messages. • 4. Men are more emotionally constricted • Unresponsive to others. • Inexpressive of their own feelings. COM 340 Intercultural Communication

18. D. Why can’t a man be more like a woman (and vice versa)? • 1. Cultural stereotypes. • 2. Other people reward us for conforming to the stereotypes. • 3. Parents may socialize us to conform to the stereotypes. • 4. Possible “sex-linked biobehavioral predispositions” (i.e. genetic explanation) COM 340 Intercultural Communication

19. E. Difficult does not mean impossible: Improving male-female communication • 1. Androgyny: Both males and females become both instrumental & expressive. • 2. Remember the good parts of the other person’s communication style. • 3. Try to speak the other person’s language. • 4. Get a “interpreter” if it’s necessary. • 5. Express your love; express that you’re trying. • 6. Listen when your partner says these things to you. COM 340 Intercultural Communication