Our thoughts LOVE vs. Infatuation
Love Is…… Write it down on your heart.
Ladder of Love • Mature love for others • Love for humankind, very unselfish love. • Love for children • Unselfish love with ability to love without expecting anything in return. • Love for the opposite sex • Begins with interest in the other sex and continues throughout life. • Love for someone the same sex, older • Role model and exemplified what you wanted to become. • Love for same sex friend • Close friend of the same age and sex. • First love outside the family • You had fun with this person and loved him for the times shared. • Love of other relatives • Love of a relative which brought a special sense of security. • Love for secondary caregiver • This person met your needs and cared for you. Usually your father. • Love for primary caregiver • Your primary caregiver (usually mother). • Self-love • Until you love yourself, you cannot truly love another.
We know for sure that…. • Love is vital to the well-being of a person • Elderly in rest homes or without spouse • Love is based on and best expressed through trust, honesty, and respect. • There are many types of love that we receive daily. • Before you can love anyone else, you must first love yourself = Self Love 9 types of love
SELF-LOVE • Respect and concern for self • An egotistic, narcissistic kind of love.
Unconditional love • It asks for nothing in return. • Showing love towards someone regardless of his or her actions or beliefs.
COMPANIONSHIP LOVE. Typically found in good friendships
PLATONIC LOVE • Based upon Non-sexual feelings with the opposite sex and not physical attraction. • Spiritual and intellectual relationship between a man and a woman.
MANIC LOVE • A crazy, possessive, jealous kind of love.
ROMANTIC LOVE Also known as “puppy love”, and is an exaggerated form of love.
ALTRUISTIC LOVE Selfless love or concern for the spouse.
Happens quickly Short-lived Physical thrills Jealousy Rush to marry Grows slowly Long lasting Trust More realistic More thoughtful Infatuation vs. Love
Love is a feeling you feel when you feel you are feeling a feeling you’ve never felt before.
Tunnel Of Love Experience Get into groups of 4 and complete the steps on the envelope
Love is …….. • * Grows slowly, beginning with friendship • * Lasts over a long period of time • * Involves the entire character and personality of the partner • * The relationship grows and matures as time passes • * Little jealousy—accepting of one another's feelings • * Work harder at assigned tasks • * Less emotional and moody—more happy and kind • * Opinions of other people are not as important • * Fun times and friendship are more important than a physical relationship • * Share common interests • * Enjoy being together without need of expensive entertainment • * Trust and have confidence in self and in the relationship • * Trust the partner • * There is no rush to make decisions—the future is planned with confidence • * More vital, more energy • * See life realistically
Infatuation is ………. • Is common during teen years • * Grows rapidly—love at first sight • * Does not last long • * Occurs shortly after breaking up with someone—known as “on the rebound” • * Is centered on a few admired traits in the other person • * Is often based on physical traits or feelings • * Does not see or acknowledge the other person's weaknesses • * The relationship stays the same for a long time—does not go anywhere • * Selfish and possessive of the other person—jealous • * Disagreements are common -- fighting • * Daydream—cannot concentrate on necessary tasks • * May lose your appetite • * Is easily influenced by the person they are infatuated with • * Creates a selfish relationship—"How can he/she help me get what I want?" • * Other people's opinions matter too much • * May be based on physical enjoyment–a couple who finds themselves bored without physical stimulation • * Feelings of insecurity • * Lack of trust in partner • * Feels a real need to marry • * Causes lack of ambition and to disregard problems
He’s teaching her arithmetic He said is was his mission, He kissed her once, he kissed her twice and said, “Now that’s addition.” And as he added smack by smack is silent satisfaction, she sweetly gave the kisses back and said, “Now that’s subtraction.” Then he kissed her, she kissed him without an explanation, then both together smiled an said, “That’s multiplication.” Then Dad appeared upon the scene and made a quick decision, He kicked that kid three blocks away and said, “That’s long-division!”
WEB Dear ABBY Money and status Money and status Sex /physical Sex/physical Physical looks Physical looks WHAT ELSE? INFATUATION LOVE
What Love Isn’t Dear Abby, after 13 years of being with an abusive husband, I finally figured out what a jerk he really is. I sat down one day and wrote down all the things he has put me through and titled it, “Love isn’t”…. • Raising you hand with intent to scare or harm your spouse. • Making yourself absent when your spouse is sick • Standing them up for important celebrations • Screaming or yelling at them • Calling them names: stupid, liar, #!@% • Being nice only when you want affection • Not letting them express their opinions • Thinking of yourself first • Criticizing them in front of other people • Threatening them • Being physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive