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This section explores the barriers to emotional bonding through a character study of Judas, highlighting past injuries, defense mechanisms, and distorted thinking that hinder trust and connection. It offers practical skills for fostering relationships, such as vulnerability, active listening, and embracing emotional experiences. Readers will learn how personal and relational perceptions impact bonding and how to implement changes that promote healthier interactions within teams. Engage in truth and grace as a foundation for building stronger relationships.
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Conqueror’s CourseBonding – Part II Barriers to Bonding Character Study – Judas Skills to Help You Bond Team Time Agenda
Barriers to Bonding Page 27 • Past Injury • “Trust Muscle” (how did our muscle grow?) • Vulnerable – symptom of a good trust muscle • Defense Mechanisms(everyone has them) • Projection (pushing needs onto others) • Reaction Formation (suppresses what you really feel) • Substitution (drugs, food, sex, etc.) • For a complete list, see notes
Barriers to Bonding • Distorted Thinking • Ourselves • “I am bad” • “Something about me scares people away” • Others • “People are mean and critical” • God • “God doesn’t care about the way I feel. He Just wants me to be good.” • For a complete list, see notes
God’s Way vs. Our Culture? • What are your 10 relational commandments in your family? Changes That Heal, pgs. 104-108 • How are these contrary to God’s culture? • What do you have to guard against?
Character Study • Judas – John 12:1-8 • How were Judas’s relationships? • With God • With others • With himself • How did John feel about Judas? • Why? How strong is that feeling? • How did God feel? How did Jesus react? • Who was Judas thinking about? During betrayal? • How did he respond when he realized what he did?
Learning to Bond • Skills for Bonding • Move toward others (work at it) • Be vulnerable – “open to criticism or attack” • Challenge distorted thinking • Take risks • Be comfortable with emotion (feeling chart) • Say “Yes” to life, yes to invitations to bond • For a complete list, see notes
Team Time • Volunteer to share REBT sheet • In your teams, the goal is truth & grace • Take turns speaking and listening • If you need more time, work it out