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LEARNING INTENTION: To liken something to something else, by using similes. Examples: My attention was as far away as love on a battlefield. Her skin is pale as eggshells. Create Similes. Complete the following: The sun sank in the west like… The baby opened its mouth for food like…
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LEARNING INTENTION: To liken something to something else, by using similes. Examples: My attention was as far away as love on a battlefield. Her skin is pale as eggshells. Create Similes Complete the following: The sun sank in the west like… The baby opened its mouth for food like… When he left, it was quiet… The shadow hung on the wall like… His words were as painful as… The sun on the water was like… On roller skates she looked as awkward as… The sky was as blue as… The clouds rolled across the sky like.. After our huge dinner of fish and chips, we felt like…
METAPHORS A metaphor is like a simile. That's because it is a comparison that is made between things, which is not always likely or obvious. We don’t use ‘like’ or ‘as’ in a metaphor. We often use metaphors without realising it. For instance, when we say that your parents 'bark a command' at you, you are comparing them to a dog, and hence engaging in metaphor! Other Metaphors A heart of stone He has the heart of a lionYou are the sun in my skyYou are the light in my lifeShe is my East and my West, my compass.You had better pull your socks upLove is a lemon - either bitter of sweet
LEARNING INTENTION: to understand that a metaphor is a word picture in which the writer replaces the thing to be described with another image. It makes a more direct and vivid comparison to a simile. Examples: The moon is a pearl from a necklace. The moon is a cold, cheesy pizza. The moon is earth’s halo Create Metaphors Try to write three metaphors for each of the following examples: the sun an apple clouds cheese a cat the ocean fog anger
LEARNING INTENTION: to understand that in personification, the non-human is identified with the human or given human characteristics. Examples:The steel beam clenched its muscles. Clouds limped across the sky. The pebbles on the path were grey with grief. Cricket has been good to me. The New Zealand dollar had a quiet month. Life dealt him a heavy blow. Personification Give the following items human characteristics: wind refugee camp night cold moon war
LEARNING INTENTION: to understand that Onomatopoeia is found in a group of words that attempts to replicate certain sounds. We have words like woof-woof, or bow wow, tweet-tweet, and cock-a-doodle doo. However, these words are still the creation of the human mind. Examples:crackle, splat, ooze, squish, boom. The tyres whirr on the road. The pitter-patter of soft rain. The mud oozed and squished through my toes. Onomatopoeia Write onomatopoeia for the following: gun sound wind bomb tank planes walking in snow
IMPACT Show Don’t Tell To write what is happening in the story without explicitly stating it. Telling sentence: Joe was old. Showing sentence: Joe creacked when he moved, his arthritic limbs bowed beneath the weight of his eighty years Below are some telling sentences which simply state facts. Transform them into showing sentences: 1. It was cold on the beach. 2. Dad was angry. 3. My friend is a great rugby player. 4. The house needed repairs. 5. The car braked suddenly.
You can improve your writing by removing unnecessary words. It is possible to eliminate unnecessary words but still retain the same information. First Draft The idea was thought of by Jim at four o’clock early in the morning. (14 words) Revised Jim’s idea came at 4 am. (6 words) Make every word count Rewrite these sentences, eliminating all the unnecessary words to make each sentence more precise. He looked at Mike. Mike was his brother. The people that I would like to tell you about are my father and mother. He let me know that the contest the Bulldogs were in resulted in a win for the Bulldogs. In the vase were some daffodils. The vase of daffodils was on the table. This recipe deals with and describes one method used to attain the desired result in the preparation of scrambled eggs.
Create Word Pictures We can add details to a sentence to make an image more vivid and life-like. Bland The man had a hairy face. Interesting The hair on Mr Twit’s face didn’t grow smooth and matted as it does on most hairy-faced men. It grew in spikes that struck out straights like bristles of a nail brush. • Rewrite these sentences using details to make the image live. • The room was dark • The girl ran • His dog was unwashed and smelly • The lady next door is a busy body.
Focus on the Facts We can add on sufficient information to help the reader understand better. Example A boat came to the island. What kind of boat was it? Who was aboard the boat? What were the feelings of the passengers about reching the island? When did the boat arrive? What was the purpose of the visit? Read the following sentences. What questions would you ask the writer to ensure that all the essential information was given. 1. I don’t like school. 2. My aunt is in hospital. 3. We like going out for dinner. Select one of these sentences. Rewrite them with sufficient information.
LEARNING INTENTION: To think of as many different ways as you can to express the same idea. Example: Mary is a good person. Mary is a lovely person. Mary is a wonderful person. Mary is a superb person. Mary is a delightful person. Replace Overworked Words For my birthday I got lots of presents. It was a lovely day. We got off the train at Wellington. My sister got fifty dollars a week. In the war, lots of men got injured. Feeling annoyed, the teacher went out of the room. We had a nice holiday in Dunedin where we met many nice people.
Strong Verbs By using strong verbs we can express movement and help to create a picture in the reader’s mind. Well-chosen verbs can give writing power. With throttles open all the way, big bad bruce and his gang charge down the highway on their Harleys. Bruce blasts along the highway at top speed. Icy wind whacks into his face. He whacks it back, twice as hard. He zooms around corners and shoots up the straight. He pushes his bike to the max. from Big Bad Bruce by Dianne Bates • Write a description of the action in each of thes pharases using strong verbs. • a man kicking a door • a lion stalking prey • a rabbit digging a hole • a getaway car speeding around a corner • a dog chasing a cat
Using a Thesaurus A thesaurus extend your word power. Don't Say "Said," Say declared exclaimed questioned replied repeated bellowed shouted responded whispered asked