Sexual Expression and Communication

1. Sexual Expression and Communication • Goals • To understand theories of love and mate selection • To explore aspects of sexual attractiveness, expression, and eroticism

3. What’s the Triarchic Theory of Love? INTIMACY Liking Romantic loveCompanionate love Consummate love (has all three components) PASSION COMMITMENT InfatuationFatuous loveEmpty love Nonlove (void of all three components)

4. What Are Some Other Mate Selection Theories?

7. What About Sexual Attraction and Expression? • Sexual Scripts • Definition of erotic • Masturbation • Monogamy, premarital sex, affairs, hooking up, and all that • Polyamory

8. History of Sexuality Revisited

9. Bi or Gay Curious?

10. Downright android definitions: • “may or may not lead to a relationship, which can mean a longer period of uncertainty for women who are increasingly delaying marriage” —October 24, 2012 • “can mean anything from 20 minutes of strenuous kissing to spending the night together fully clothed to sexual intercourse” —January 5, 2000 • “emphasizes group friendships over the one-pair model of dating, and, therefore, removes the negative stigma from those who can’t get a date” —December 13, 2008 • “an emotionless connection that can make sex ‘safe’” —August 16, 2009

11. Vaguely human-like definitions • “among young people, characterized by spontaneous, commitment-free (and often, alcohol-fueled) romantic flings” —January 11, 2013 • “[i]nstead of going steady” —July 7, 2010 • “a casual sexual encounter with no expectation of future emotional commitment. Think of it as a one-night stand with someone you know” —December 13, 2008 • “casual sex” —June 20, 2010 • “going beyond kissing” —November 11, 2011

12. Skin-crawl-y definitions: • “what used to be light petting. Just about everything else comes under having sex.” —October 20, 1996 • “coupling”—November 28, 2004 • “getting down” —November 5, 2000 • “the back cover of The Hook-up Handbook makes a stab at it: a hookup is ‘anything from making out to doing the nasty, generally with no commitment or plans for said commitment.’” —April 3, 2005 • “enjoying ‘friends with benefits’” —October 11, 2010

13. Gendered, Agoraphobic, and Ageist Definitions: • “‘Hooking up’ to a man means having sex,’ he said. ‘But to a woman it means kissing or fondling.’” —January 2, 1991 • “sex is this looming possibility from the first moment you meet a prospective partner” —November 8, 2003 • “a particularly millennial pastime” —May 7, 2010 • “the kids volunteered: ‘No expected commitment,’ ‘Sexual pleasure’ and ‘Guarding emotions,’ meaning you can enjoy yourself without the messiness of attachment.” —November 20, 2011

14. Judgmental definitions: • “fleeting sexual encounters” —August 29, 2001 • “the ‘no strings attached’ sex that for many wasn’t turning out to be so carefree” —April 28, 2011 • “I figured that it was a fad that would soon fizzle. I was wrong. It seems to be becoming the norm.” —December 13, 2008 • “the sex seems so disconnected from anything resembling even liking the other person” —September 9, 2008 • “having oral sex and other intimate contact at parties with people they may hardly know” —October 10, 2000