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Love: What it does and does not do

Love: What it does not do -- What it does do – John 13:34, 35. Love: What it does and does not do. Introduction. John 13:34, 35 (15:12, 17).

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Love: What it does and does not do

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  1. Love: What it does not do -- What it does do –John 13:34, 35

  2. Love: What it does and does not do • Introduction. John 13:34, 35 (15:12, 17). • A. Jesus would soon leave His apostles and for them to carry out their work they needed to get over their rivalry and be united (Jn. 17:21, 23). • B. Why say “new” when Lev. 19:18 taught love (Mark 12:30)? • C. New because they are to love each other “as I have loved you.” 1 Jn. 3:16, “He laid down His life for us. And we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren.”

  3. Love: What it does and does not do • D. This was a love that caused Christ to leave heaven, come to earth, suffer and die for them. His love was genuine… constant… sacrificial. • E. V. 35, “By this shall all men know that you are my disciples.” Recognized… distinguished… this would be their badge, their uniform. • F. Col. 3:14, “And beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.”

  4. Love: What it does and does not do • G. This would not merely cause the world to marvel at them. By this they would exert strong influence on the world (like salt, light). • H. Even pagans would say, “See how the Christians love each other. They are ready to lay down their lives for each other.”

  5. Love: What it does and does not do • I. Jn. 13:35, “By this all will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.” • Not just by profession. Not just by insisting on “Christian only,” “church of Christ,” right doctrine, worship, organization.

  6. Love: What it does and does not do • I. Love (agapao). • A. Vine: “Agape and agapao are used in the N.T. (a) to describe the attitude of God toward His Son, Jn. 17:26; the human race, generally, Jn. 3:16; and to such as believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, particularly, Jn. 14:21…

  7. Love: What it does and does not do “(b) to convey His will to His children concerning their attitude one toward another, Jn. 13:34, and toward all men, 1 Thess. 3:12.. (c) to express the essential nature of God, 1 Jn. 4:8…

  8. Love: What it does and does not do • “Love can be known only from the actions it prompts. God’s love is seen in the gift of His Son, 1 Jn. 4:9, 10… • “Christian love, whether exercised toward the brethren, or toward men generally, is not an impulse from the feelings, it does not always run with the natural inclinations, nor does it spend itself only upon those for whom some affinity is discovered… (doesn’t mean “like”)

  9. Love: What it does and does not do • “Love seeks the welfare of all, Rom. 15:2, and works no ill to any, 13:8-10; love seeks opportunity to do good to ‘all men, and especially toward them that are of the household of the faith,’ Gal. 6:10.” (End of quote). • This “love” is not blind. Phil. 1:9, “And this I pray, that your love may abound still more and more in knowledge and all discernment.”

  10. Love: What it does and does not do • So this love (agapao) is the love of intelligence and purpose (not emotional, sentimental love). • Love God: implies that we know the one, true, living God in all His greatness. • Love with all our heart, soul, mind and strength, means turn to Him with our whole being... • Love man for who he is, “made in image of God” and love brethren for who they are.

  11. Love: What it does and does not do • B. Thayer: “agapao, to love, to be full of good-will and exhibit the same: Luke 7:47; 1 Jn. 4:7 sq.; with acc. of the person, to have a preference for, wish well to, regard the welfare of: Mt. 5:43…” • Even the welfare of our enemies. Mat. 5:44, “love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.”

  12. Love: What it does and does not do • C. So, again, we are not talking about an emotion or sentiment, but rather constructive… indestructible… invinciblegood will toward all. • Eph. 5:2, “walk in love…” This is the very environment in which we live. • Col. 3:14, “put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.” This is our UNIFORM that identifies us as Christians. (Jn. 13:35, “By this…”)

  13. Love: What it does and does not do • D. This is not to minimize phileo, love in the sense of affection (Titus 2:4)… brotherly love… even kiss (philema)… Rom. 12:10 (twice), “be affectionate toward each other in brotherly love.” • Agapao love can produce phileo love. Be super good to your wife and you’ll be increasingly affectionate to her.

  14. Love: What it does and does not do • II. What love does NOT do: • A. Titus 3:3, “For we ourselves were also once: • -- foolish: house on sand… bigger barns…virgins • -- disobedient: 1:16, profess to know God but are disobedient… Paul thought he was serving God. • -- deceived (all sinners are), by our own lusts and appetites, false religion.

  15. Love: What it does and does not do • -- serving various lusts and pleasures. When they were slaves to such. But now slaves of God. • -- malice and envy go together, ill will, jealous, resentful of the blessings others receive. • -- hateful and hating one another. Despises not only other people but even himself. Miserable existence. • -- this is the way we WERE, but not now!

  16. Love: What it does and does not do • B. Gal. 5:14, “For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ 15. But if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another!” • Like animals (but these only have two legs). • You mean there are BRETHREN who bite and devour each other? And this is “brotherly love”?

  17. Love: What it does and does not do • Spiteful criticisms, judging hearts and motives, derogatory remarks, snide observations. • “The Gingham Dog and the Calico Cat: The truth about the cat and the pup is this: they ate each other up.”

  18. Love: What it does and does not do • C. Gal. 5:26, “Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.” • Conceit and jealousy are two of the fundamental fleshly lusts. Very degrading. Very unbecoming in the church. Cause constant provocation. • What’s the connection? 2 Tim. 3:2; Rom. 12:3. 1 Cor. 4:7. Nothing one is or has is of himself. Have nothing that we haven’t received.

  19. Love: What it does and does not do • D. Eph. 4:31, put away “bitterness, the settled disposition of one who is resentful; anger, strong, sudden antagonism, explosive, potential murder; wrath, like a roaring furnace, settled indignation; clamor, yelling at others; railing, blasphemy, speaking against God or man; malice, takes delight in inflicting hurt or injury” (Hendriksen)

  20. Love: What it does and does not do • E. James 4:11, “Do not speak evil of one another. 5:9, Brethren, do not grumble against one another, that you yourselves may not be judged.” • “He who speaks evil of a brother (to his back of course, so he can’t defend himself) and judges his brother, speaks evil of the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.”

  21. Love: What it does and does not do • Of course, this admonition is not in conflict with Matt. 7:15; 1 Tim. 1:20; 3 Jn. 9, 10, etc. • We have to “judge” a brother in the sense of recognizing his fault in order to restore him (Gal. 6:1, 2) • Or to withdraw from him if he won’t repent (Rom. 16:17, “mark”; 1 Cor. 5; 2 Thess. 3).

  22. Love: What it does and does not do • This is not what James means, but speaking evil and judging in the sense of 1:26; 3:9; Matt. 7:1. • Running him down, when he isn’t present to defend himself. Judging by appearance, Jn. 7:24. • Why is this judging the law? In disobeying the “royal law” (2:8) one sets aside this law and puts himself above it… and in effect implies that the law isn’t good, isn’t worthy to be obeyed.

  23. Love: What it does and does not do • Why do we do it? Do we complain, groan, grumble against someone we really love? Your wife or husband? • Do we really love our brethren? • “By this all men shall know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another.”

  24. Love: What it does and does not do • F. Matt. 18:6, “whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in Me to stumble, it is better for him that a heavy millstone be hung around his neck, and that he be drowned in the depth of the sea.” • Should do our best to convert and save people (difficult, few obey), but we must be sure to not cause any brother/sister to stumble.

  25. Love: What it does and does not do • III. What love DOES (remember: it is only known but its ACTIONS). • A. Rom. 12: 9, “Let love (agape) be without hypocrisy… 10. In love of brethren (philadelphia) be kindly affectionate to one another (philostor-gio, family love; our love for each other in the church should rival the love we have for family).

  26. Love: What it does and does not do • We should show strong, warm affection for brethren. The idea is loving dearly (Phil. 1:8). • “We don’t go in for showing emotion.” No certain way bound. At that time and with many today, the kiss or embrace. Now, here, handshake • Rom. 16:16, “holy kiss” (philema). Emphasize “holy” (1 Pet. 5:14, “love”). • But in some manner warm affection to be shown.

  27. Love: What it does and does not do • … “in honor giving preference to one another.” • Not grasping honor for ourselves, nor even waiting for brethren to honor us. • But rather be an example (take the lead) in honoring them, desire to exalt them, not self. Deferential, not grasping.

  28. Love: What it does and does not do • B. Rom. 15:14, “Now I myself am confident concerning you, my brethren, that you also are full of goodness (uprightness of heart), filled with all knowledge, able also to admonish one another.” • Not saying there was no room for growth in goodness and knowledge, but they had the maturity they needed to handle problems. • “Love” demands that we admonish each other.

  29. Love: What it does and does not do • Heb. 3:13, “exhort one another daily…” • Do we love enough to exhort, admonish? • Don’t want to embarrass, hurt his/her feelings? • Is that more important than saving the soul?

  30. Love: What it does and does not do • C. 1 Cor. 12:25, “the members should have the same care (concern, anxiety) for one another. 26 And if one member suffers (misfortune, sorrow, loss) all the members suffer with it (share their sorrow); or if one member is honored (prosper-ity, success, promotion), all the members (instead of envy) rejoice with it.” • We are NOT in competition with each other. • Avoid strife, division, but also avoid indifference.

  31. Love: What it does and does not do • We are Christ’s “body.” Think of how the eyes, hands minister to an injured member of the physical body! The whole body responds. • Also think of how proud parents are of their children’s accomplishments (here, school, etc.). • We don’t envy those we love.

  32. Love: What it does and does not do • D. Gal. 5:13, “through love serve one another.” This is to be our habitual conduct. Like Jesus (Jn. 13:15); like Paul, (1 Cor. 9:19-22). • Love is unselfish… wants to serve others. Does not do so grudgingly (“I guess I ought to visit…”) • Phil. 2:4, “Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” 2:20, Timothy, “sincerely concerned for your welfare…”

  33. Love: What it does and does not do • E. Gal. 6:1-2, “Bear one another’s burdens…” • What burdens? V. 1, “if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted.” • Love does not overlook sin, but works to restore the erring to usefulness. “Restore” - same word used for mending nets, Matt. 4:21.

  34. Love: What it does and does not do • -- “you who are spiritual” (5:22, 23), filled with and governed by spirit…walk in Spirit, 5:25. • Certainly elders, but should include every member. Either spiritual or carnal (1 Cor. 3:3). • Of course, if not spiritual, how can he restore someone else? He’s in need of restoration himself • This is not just a suggestion, not optional. It’s a commandment and love requires it. To disobey this is to show lack of love.

  35. Love: What it does and does not do • Even “withdrawing” is an act of love, 1 Cor. 5:5. • But first, every effort should be made by the congregation (all the spiritual) to restore. • Some brethren “trigger happy,” a member miss for a time, “we should withdraw from him.” • Withdraw what? Yourselves, company, social contact (1 Cor. 5:11). But if there has been no association with him, what do we withdraw?

  36. Love: What it does and does not do • F. Eph. 4:2, “with all humility, lowliness of mind, aware of God’s greatness, therefore, submissive. • -- and gentleness, meekness, strong but gentle, not docile, much less weak. • -- with longsuffering, 2 Pet. 3:15, “the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation.” “If God had been a man, he would long since have wiped out the world for all its disobedience.”

  37. Love: What it does and does not do • -- forbearing (bearing with) one another in love,” accepting and seeking best for each other. • -- endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” (Then follow 7 “ones”). • Church made up of all kinds of people: Jew-Gentile; rich-poor; educated-uneducated; different race, color… BUT ONLY ONE BODY.

  38. Love: What it does and does not do • G. Eph. 4:32, “And be kind to one another (just plain, ordinary human kindness, great blessing). • -- tender-hearted, genuine pity, compassion. Pagan philosophy: “If one is in affliction, you may say that you have pity on him, but take care not to feel any pity.” • 1 Thess. 5:14, “comfort the fainthearted, uphold the weak, be patient with all.”

  39. Love: What it does and does not do • -- forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” • “Well, I’ll forgive you but I’ll never forget.” Heb. 8:12, “their sins I will remember no more.” • Worst possible description of a person: “he or she is not like God.” • Forgive or forfeit forgiveness! James 2:13.

  40. Love: What it does and does not do • H. Eph. 6:18, “praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints…” • Col. 4:12, “Epaphras, who is one of you, a bondservant of Christ, greets you, always laboring fervently for you in prayers, that you may stand perfect and complete in all the will of God.”

  41. Love: What it does and does not do • I. 1 Thess. 4:18, “comfort one another with these words… 5:11 encourage one another, and build up one another…” Everyone says “comfort” but! • Love not only encourages (never discourages brethren), also takes positive steps to build up. • Anyone can tear down… takes love, spiritual maturity, effort… to build up.

  42. Love: What it does and does not do • J. Philemon 7, “the hearts of the saints have been refreshed by you, brother.” • “He’s a pain.” “She makes me tired.” “Oh, here comes …” “He’s always so down in the mouth.” • How sad when we only get discouragement from fellow-members of the church.

  43. Love: What it does and does not do • K. Heb. 10:24, “And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works…” • How? V. 25, “not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as is the manner of some…” • Are we “inconsiderate” of our brethren? Do we fail to “stir up love and good works”? • Nothing more discouraging than an empty pew.

  44. Love: What it does and does not do • Conclusion • Identify of the true church, true disciples. • Sign important. Profession important. Emphasis on Founder, Foundation, doctrine, worship, organization very important. • However, remember FIRST COMMANDMENT and a second like unto it. This is our life. • And John 13:35. By THIS shall they know…!

  45. Love: What it does and does not do • This we must do to be like Christ, transformed into His image, Rom. 8:29; 2 Cor. 3:18. • This we must do to be “partakers of the divine nature” (2 Pet. 1:4). • Without this we will not go to Heaven! • “Now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love” (1 Cor. 13:13).

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