Today we will: • Talk about revision strategies; • Update our submission to PIT; • Continue our conversations on the PIT platform. Reminder: 15-minute mandatory conferences starting today—check your appointment time!
“I never revise!” • Five group questions under Post Your Work > Week 13 > Revision Freewrite > Your Group • Discuss the question in your group and, as a group, write a paragraph in response to it • 5 minutes!
Updating Your Current Submission • login to the PIT website: http://siteslab.org/pitjournal • go to “my account” “my posts” • find your current submission click on the title click the edit tab • delete your mission statement and paste your conference proposal • click “save”
Real Student Feedback (Spring 2011) • “The paper can be improved by adding a joint comparison at the end of the paper. Take the stereotypes used in both ads and create a discussion as to how the ads are used towards different audiences in the two different sources. Also, explain why in pg. 3 par. 2 “petite and dainty” are characteristics not considered butch. You could briefly discuss what the ideal feminine woman wants to be ….” • “You need to mention the main argument in the intro. Mention the actual stereotypes.” • “The last sentence on page 2 is very vague.” • “One weakness is definitely evident in the last paragraph; this is the inclusion of some points that are possible arguments but have little or no evidence. I am referring to the point about a young audience. The last sentence probably [could] be included elsewhere with the American patriotism argument. Other small problems may be the use of many ideas that seem more like assumptions.” • “Nothing really, just try to find more ideas for the 2nd ad.” • “More emphasis on the 2nd ad.”
Continue those PIT Conversations… 1. EITHER If you have received feedback from a reviewer: • Write a response thanking the reviewer for taking the time to write. • Point your reviewer to specific parts of the paper, or sections, and ask specific questions (e.g. In paragraph X, I am exploring Y. Do I need to give more background about Z? Do you have a sense of how my argument here is working? Etc.) • Describe the kind of feedback you want, and the kind of feedback you DO NOT want (e.g. I am not looking for suggestions about organization, word choice, grammar, etc.). • Even if the reviewer doesn’t respond a second time, this will help you focus on your paper’s strengths and weaknesses and help you figure out what needs to be improved 2. OR If you have not received feedback/when you are done responding to feedback to your own submission: • Review someone else’s submission (preferably from our class) • Take a look at the guide for writing a successful conference proposal again to make sure that the submission you’re reviewing meets the genre, length requirement, tone, style, etc. • Use the praise burger and be polite
Homework for Monday • Using the feedback you may have received from your group members or reviewers on the PIT platform, revise your Conference Proposal, print it, and turn it in for mock grading before class starts on Wednesday. • Go back to the reviews you wrote for Monday and check whether you can continue your conversations with the persons whose work you’ve reviewed. Also engage in conversations with your own PIT editor(s). Ask further questions, discuss the minutiae of your work together, and, as always, be polite and considerate.