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Couples Building Rock Solid Marriages

Couples Building Rock Solid Marriages. “Your Heart” The Body Part Series November 7, 2010. Where are we going?. Your Heart, part 1 - today Fall Marriage Panel-Nov 14 ( Shupes , Andersons, Halinans , Sinclairs , Kahlers ) Our Tongue- Nov 21

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Couples Building Rock Solid Marriages

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  1. Couples Building Rock Solid Marriages “Your Heart” The Body Part Series November 7, 2010

  2. Where are we going? Your Heart, part 1 - today Fall Marriage Panel-Nov 14 (Shupes, Andersons, Halinans, Sinclairs, Kahlers) Our Tongue- Nov 21 (Brian and Tiffany Gaston testimony) No class Nov 28--Happy Thanksgiving Christmas Dinner- Dec 4 Skin & Nerves-Dec 5 The Whole Person -- Dec 12 Your Heart, part 2 -- Dec 19 No classes Dec 26/Jan 2 Class resumes Jan 9, 2011

  3. How are we made up? Body- dust to dust; war between flesh and spirit; temple; new body Mind- knowledge; understanding; transformable; changes Spirit- given; taken; renewed; breathed (pneuma) Soul- won/lost; possessed individually Heart- source; inner person; center

  4. What we say and hear about the emotional heart • “I gave my heart away.” • “I am brokenhearted over _________.” • “I love you with all my heart.” • “My heart is heavy.” • “Let’s get to the heart of the matter.” • “I mean it from my heart.” • “The effort was half-hearted.” • “My heart aches for that child.” • “He has a divided heart on the matter!” • “ I felt good in my heart about…..”

  5. Your Heart Life giving Seat of emotion and will Hard and Soft heart Broken and Contrite heart Joyful and Thankful heart

  6. At your tables What are the things that can effect our physical heart condition? What is a Scripture that comes to mind about your Heart?

  7. What the Bible says about Heart • Greek = “Kardia”; Hebrew = “leb” -- hidden, inner man, center, real, source, feelings, emotions, enclosed • Proverbs 4:23-- “Above all, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” • 1 Samuel 16:7-- “….for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” • Jeremiah 17:9-10-- “The heart is more deceitful than all else and is desperately sick; who can understand it? I, the Lord search the heart …” • Mark 7:21-23-- “For from within, from the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts…murders…thefts…deceit… covetousness…pride…foolishness…all these come from within and defile a man.” • Hebrews 4:12-- “Like a sharp, two-edged sword, the Word divides the inner man asunder, to reveal the true condition and needs of our hearts.”

  8. More Heart from Scripture • Ps 51- “Create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a right spirit within me.”; “….the sacrifices to God are a broken and contrite heart…” • John 14:1- “Let not your heart be troubled.” • Matt 6:21- “Where your treasure is, there your heart is also.” • Psalm 27 - “I would have lost heart had I not believed that I would see the goodness of the Lord…” • James 3 - “Wisdom from above is 1st pure hearted…” • Deuteronomy 6:5- “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might.”

  9. Your Heart can/can be: • Laugh • Dirty or clean • Searched • Some or all of it can be used-- “all my heart” • Joyful • Speak • Have desires, blessed • Faint • Be seen • Sad, sighs • Moved • Wise, anxious, faithful, in turmoil • Hide things • Lust, deceit, wicked plans • Divided, unrepentant • Hardened

  10. As a couple • What do you think of when you hear the term ‘hardened heart’?

  11. At least 3 Heart conditions might be present in this room today 1.Congenital heart disease: A lost, stained, heart. 1 John 1:5-10; John 3:17-18; Psalm 51:5 ; John 1:1-14 2. Coronary Artery Disease (Atheroscleroris): Saved, but varnished, having become a hard and constricted heart from sin and neglect, perhaps quenching the Holy Spirit’s flow of fruit and gifts to your heart. 1 John 1:9 ; Psalm 51:10 & 12

  12. At least 3 Heart conditions might be present in this roomtoday 3. Aneurism: An artery that has a weak wall and is in danger of failing and not supplying life giving power.

  13. Two wholes merging as one We want to be accepted, not judged. We want to be known, not fixed; protected, not exploited. We want to know the other, not be strangers. We want to be explored, not labeled. We want to be discovered, not explained. We want to be deeply connected, not mechanically supported, nor inwardly turned, nor ignored. We want to be vulnerable, not attacked or manipulated. We want to be heard and honored, not just tolerated . We want to be “all-in”, with all our healthy heart, taking dead aim at our marriage and faith.

  14. Sometimes we can hurt each other and show a hardened heart • Make our mate feel inferior, stupid, guilty • Devalue their inner self, core beliefs, fundamental make-up • Off-load anger, tension, stress • Let them know how bad we hurt, by hurting them • Make yourself be seen as right--manipulation • Alienate them and make them feel alone • Dominate or control your mate in order to feel in control • Throw-off responsibility • Deflect the blame • Hide your real feeling, pain • Hide your failures

  15. At your tables • Given all that the heart can be, what are the characteristics and behaviors of a hardened, weak blood flow heart in our marriages?

  16. As an individual • Are you hard hearted in your marriage? • How do you behave when you exhibit hard heartedness? • What is the root cause? • How does your mate display hard heartedness? • Share your answers this week.

  17. Jeremiah 18 Spirit of the living God, fall fresh on me. Melt me, Mold me, Fill me, Use me. By Daniel Iverson

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